Raylee

Amazing!

No doubt up among my favourite Inkitt stories! It is well written, flows wonderfully and I am always captivated and wanting to read more. I cannot wait to read the rest of this story (and hopefully maybe others if this continues) and no doubt recommend this to everyone. The plot and development of this story are marvelous, There are nearly no errors and I truly anticipate Wendy and Avel's coming adventures. Terrific work, Ms Grey.

Got boring.

It feels a bit lackluster, and there seems to be a lot going on far too quickly. I'm sure it has driven some readers away. Personally, I think the biggest issue would be the writing style. The changes in point of views, whilst they have been noted, happen rather abruptly and can often be confusing. There are a lot places where punctuation is missing, especially during speech. Frankly it got boring very quickly. Sentences dragged on quite a bit, and I found myself often skimming through. Also why have one sentence as a paragraph? That happened a lot from what I read. I really, really wanted to give this a decent chance. I was in fact quite looking forward to reading this, and when I read the first chapter the... prologue? Background? Well, it was just riddled with issues and mistakes. Overall it was very confusing. As someone who had just started the book, I think the author meant for my curiosity to be peaked so I would keep reading, perhaps you wanted me to think who is this character? What is happening? And so on. Rather, I was more confused and lost rather than interested in continuing to read... If the author fixed these sorts of things, it would be a much better read. **This was going to be longer, but I will cut this short because I did not finish this story (which is surprising because even if I haven't liked a story, I've finished it). It felt like an unnecessary use of my time, to be frank. Maybe this story got better, maybe it didn't - I don't know so that is why. This is a review for the first six chapters of the book. The rest could be better. Could.** I don't know if I'm not quite the targeted demographic and that's why it didn't work for me, or if it's just my tastes, but no matter what it was I commend the author for their hard work. I see they published a lot of chapters and they most certainly did put effort into this. I hope to find a story of theirs that I enjoy more, and can leave a better review on.

Amazing. I love it!

Wow this is my first five stars review (I believe). I literally have nothing but praise for this story. I absolutely love it! I definitely recommend it to potential readers, and I've forced my friends to read it as well - they also love it. It's very immersive and realistic, the character's are wonderful and I have seen no errors - haha or maybe I was too invested. The description and language used is absolutely fantastic, it's so beautiful and honestly I can see the author going places. This story most definitely also has publishing potential. The writing flows and there's no unprofessional things that stick out to me, like "le time skip cause the author is lazy" etc. Even the filler chapters are good! I love it! That's.. really all I have to say. Keep up the wonderful work!

Could be better.

I think with some editing, this could be a much better story. For one, I don't believe I saw more than ten commas - and I read all the chapters currently posted. Two, it would be much better if a proper dialogue system was established. Don't bold the character's name, put a ':' and then italicize the text. Use speech marks. That would improve reading experiences immensely. Three, there are obviously some spelling and grammar errors so just rereading and editing before posting should fix that well enough. Also there is a lot of mixing between words like we're and were and so on. Making sure those kinds of things are being used correctly is important. Nevertheless, I like how the author has established/developed the characters so far and their personalities, it definitely helps make the story more interesting. Some scenes were also described very well and helped keep me invested in the story. I look forward to reading more, and hopefully giving a better second review. To potential readers, it's still very much worth a read in my opinion. Please don't be discouraged by any of this, readers and author. :)

Love it!

This story is amazing, wonderful, I definitely recommend it. Especially to mystery loving BTS fans. It's so immersive and I'm loving these characters and how they are written about. Other stories often eventually get boring or are just plain awkward to read, sometimes they don't really portray the main idol very well. In this case none of those things are true. Yoongi's point of view is very refreshing to read about and in fact I would go far as to say it's pretty accurate, I can imagine him actually experiencing these things and reacting just like he does in this story. I also love the introduction of the other member (I won't spoil it) later on, it was very subtle and works well. It felt natural, not like how some fanfictions throw all the idols together as soon as possible. Anyway, wonderful work, author! Keep up the good work~ ♡＼(￣▽￣)／♡