Just a quick review!
If you're done writing this book, this probably can be at the top list if you run through it again. I also admire how you describe each scene which the readers can imagine what exactly is happening and I commend you for that! :D
Read the story now
Usage of punctuation marks is essential in terms of writing a book. You do not want the reader to read one straight sentence even though it has adjectives/adverbs because it will sound very bland, and no stresses or pauses would be applied. One thing I learned from writing, is that refrain from using numerical values because it kills the mood of the story (well, most of the readers might feel the same way).
Wordiness in your story should be avoided too. Too many prepositions or pronouns in one paragraph can be confusing to readers, and I suggest you try rephrasing or separating it with a new paragraph/sentence. Please take note of tautologies because it can also make the paragraph contain unnecessary elements.
We improve as writers, that includes me. I hope you won't stop writing and take these criticisms as an advantage because there's always room for improvement. On the other hand, you might not see this, but I can make a book cover for you if you want. Just send me a message! It's not as good as those people who use Adobe Photoshop, but I assure you it will be a good cover! :)