Jak Reed

Self-Published Author, Aspiring Writer. 자체 발행 저자, 미래 작가

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It definitely has potential

I'm really intrigued by the plot, and the blurb. The way it's told, reminds me of how Titanic is told. However, I'm not totally sold on the way you've written all the back story. I feel like it's just thrown in there for the sake of it, and it's written more like an article than a novel. I think it would be better to incorporate it naturally into the story, rather than spending a few pages giving us the back story. Especially, since you've gotten back to the story by using "Anyway", this takes away from the novel and brings the reader out of the world.

But that's just my two cents. The back story itself is incredibly detailed, which i liked, and gives us a lot of history - something you've clearly spent a lot of time on. And I'm intrigued by how the relationship between Ada and Henryk will evolve. I'm excited to read more when you write it, and I can see the potential for it to be a really good novel. Keep it up!

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This hit me!

This hit me. This hit me hard. It's so raw and emotional, I was at a loss for words after reading it. You just don't expect it. Wow, is all I can say.

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Overall Rating
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Good Potential, Lacks Elsewhere

The story has a good premise, the plot has some potential, but your writing leaves a lot to be desired. There are grammatical errors, words missing, too many words, and some punctuation errors. I think you need to work on your writing style, and proof-reading, and then go from there. I’m a fan of the idea of the book, however. Keep working hard!

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Really intriguing, I’m a big fan

A really interesting use of vocabulary here, I love the flow of words and the meaning behind each line, you can sense the emotion emanating from the page. I’ll be following this as you write it, great work

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Overall Rating
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A good start, but needs proof-reading

The book itself is good, I enjoyed it, the first person works really well with this plot. I think it’s going to be a good read when finished. One thing I noticed a lot was certain punctuation and grammatical errors (i.e. names not being capitalised and commas, full stops missing). Other than that, a good effort thus far!

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