Where to go
It takes courage to paint such a dark future for a much loved character. Clearly this is just the beginning.
Remember that Reavers are insanely tormented characters. Wash hasn't been exposed to the Miranda treatment so he wouldn't be calmly piloting a ship if he were a true reaver. He'd be flying way closer to the edge. There's no sanity left in a Reaver so it wouldn't be calmly filing teeth, it would be an obsessive behavior to demean himself still further. Just shooting the opposing pilot wouldn't be his approach unless he isn't a true reaver. Don't get me wrong, and I hope I'm not giving away a plot element. I like the potential of this story. I can't wait to see Mal's conflict knowing his perspective on reaver psychology, and the suggestion of conflict between the captain and loyal NCO. Mal will believe that Wash would be better off dead than continue as he is. River has already hinted he can be saved. Then there's the fact that Mal and Wash have both been tortured before by Miska - how does this impact Wash's chances? And then, there's love ...
Great job, please finish it.
Things Remembered Past
Let me start by saying I really liked this. It was an excellent effort to get inside the head of a tormented young girl. The journal idea was brilliant. I enjoyed reading the entries. I was curious what age you see for River. The series is rather confused about that and I wonder myself. I see her as being mid to late teens. With that viewpoint, I see the language in your dairy as being perhaps too mature. Again, I'm not sure, but that was my response. Often in the series she spoke in a kind of staccato rhyming rhythm and I would have expected to see a little of that reflected in her journal, then again, those usually popped out when disturbed and one would guess that when journaling she was calmer. Still, great job. Write On!Read the story now
Backstory par excellence
Knowing Wash, it could well have happened this way. It is a very good backstory that would consistently explain Wah's behaviors, maybe not his fascination with dinosaurs, but how the sky calls him. There was only one area where I had a problem with the story - when he's slipping away to the spaceport. What does he know every feature of? Other than that, it was an enjoyable read.Read the story now