L. M. Huntwork

In between a city and a forest

26 I am here to beguile you to my world.

Overall Rating
Plot
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Grammar & Punctuation

Very Fascinating

I love your writing style. The way you describe things is very fun to read. The grammar doesn't necessarily distract from the storyline but there are a few lower case i's that are around. And I am only slightly confused on the age of the child. I'd love to know if this is a talking baby...or a small toddler? I'd like a little more explanation on this please!

So far it is a very gripping tale. Please continue! This was a fun one to read. Aliya appears to be a very strong character which I always love. And you already have some nice mystique with those eyes!

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Great Concept

For anyone that likes horror, you could definitely get into this one. It has all of the main themes, mystery, gore, sex and a young main character. The grammar does not take away from the story, but there are some edits that should happen throughout for better flow. Aside from that, nothing is too cliche that it would make you feel like it's a story on repeat. It has genuine mystery and another common theme: crows! There is a reason authors and directors use them in their art. The overall thematic changes should be a little more flushed out. The scenes are just a tad bit abrupt and then something else is happening, so it would be good to just add some meat to these story bones throughout.

Also, if you really like the unexpected, I was not ready for the second chapter! The story gets going very quickly which is very nice for anyone ready to delve into this campus horror novel. Hopefully the main character makes it out alive!

Overall, the concept is engaging for horror fans and after some nice edits and work, this could be a great addition to anyone's library of terror.

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Hooked me in

This is not normally my cup of tea but my goodness, did this bring me in pretty fast. I was not the biggest fan of our MC at first, more of a personal preference thing but even he grew on me. The reveal of some of his past gave me a bigger appreciation for him, much like Roma. I am super intrigued by Roma as well. He is a very dimensional character so far. Lots of layers to him that fold and unfold at different intervals, I like this aspect a whole lot. The fact that you don't keep him closed off and cold the entire time, there is an obvious humanity to him. Very well done. I did think some of the bits were happening the tiniest bit too fast, like the revealing of the needle and that Roma just suddenly dropped the fact that he was essentially found out. I don't quite understand why he dropped this so quickly and our MC spoke about a bug bite? Things were so obvious a moment ago and then they weren't. Is that denial or continued disbelief happening? Anyway, everything is very well done. There were very minor errors throughout the story (literally only two mispelled words) and that's all I could tell. I am not one for grammar but everything looked great to me. Anyway, I cannot wait to find out what happens next. This is a really fun concept and I adore the way you tell each chapter. Very, very well done.

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About an hour later

Oh man. I started this, expecting to only read the first few chapters today and woah. I am blown away by the storyline! This was so fun to read and instantly grabbed me! 11 chapters were just utterly absorbed and I am so excited to read the rest as they come out. This was a very fun read and I really am intrigued by the characters. The plot appears complex and that is super nice to see because sometimes the conflicts are just too simple. I love something that isn't easy to pinpoint. Anyway, major fan right here and I'm really excited to see where this goes and how Saf continues to grow.

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Overall Rating
Plot
Writing Style
Grammar & Punctuation

Intriguing Concepts

I absolutely adore creative fantasy novels and this one definitely is up there in the creative route. It is not entirely my cup of tea but the concepts were very fun and the grip of the characters was steady. I think there are some grammatical work and syntaxes checks that need read through. Spelling was a tad off at times as well but it was a fun read.

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