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Mike
Tense matters
I like the premise of the story and I like that you are writing from the first person perspective. The one thing that I would caution you on is to make sure you are staying in the same tense. Is the narrator telling the story as it is happening (present tense) or are they retelling a story from their past (past tense)? You seem to jump back and forth so the story becomes a little hard to follow at times.
Read the story nowI like it.
It's a decent story. I like the idea of exploring how in the absence of God, humanity will create its own and, if that god is a man, that god can become corrupt with that sort of absolute power (you can certainly see it in the behavior of the main character's brothers). I also do like how you are exploring what it would be like to grow up in a world where a mortal has the stigma of being your god and what it might take for a person to break out of that world.
There were a few grammatical errors so you may want to go over the chapters just to make sure everything sounds right.
