Natalia DeParis

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In The Gap

I think this is the best story I've read here on Inkitt! It's not the kind of story I usually read (mystery/ suspense), and I have to admit that some parts scared me. But all this thanks to the author, who makes us really imagine the scene as we read. Reading this story you can imagine everything as if you were there with the MC.

Though they were fictional characters, I found myself rooting for them as I read. As if they really existed. I even cried! The characters were built beyond the physical, but in an intense psychological way. As you read, you will identify with them, and learn from them. The characters are real.

I love the theme of your story. We are always so stuck in foolish novels, and your story made me think a lot about myself as a Christian. Your story makes us reflect on how we are acting in our life, and that the true purpose of all this is our salvation. And what made me think even more is that just like Tyler at the beginning of the story, we always think that person is saved (by accepting Christ as their savior), but many times they got lost in the middle and we don't realized that.

Your story is excellent, just as your plot. Please keep writing. I need to read more of your stories!

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The Fire Seal - Book 1

If you like stories about magic, this is the book you should read here on Inkitt. Not only by the theme of the book, but of how the story is built, and also the characters. Action, romance, teenage drama, mystery and of course fantasy.

In this story you will follow Dialla, the main character, through her discovery about her mark and also about the world of magic. What I liked the most in this story is how the protagonist was built. Dialla isn't the typical protagonist who discovers her magic and suddenly she already becomes a unique sorceress, feared and indestructible. No, she is full of fears, insecurities, doubts, and is discovering and learning about this new world she didn't know, little by little. Dialla is a teenager who sometimes acts like a spoiled, petulant brat, but elsewhere she is a caring person who loves her family and friends. And she has that complicated love life of every teenager who is still discovering what she wants, and who she wants. She makes mistakes and achievements, and that's what makes her more real.

>> If you haven't read the story yet, don't read it from here. Spoiler alert <<

The story has a slow pace, which I personally like. But when I finished reading the whole book, I realized that most of the action scenes are at the beginning of the story or at the end. And believe me, when you spend some time reading about her lessons and what she's learning, it becomes rather boring. There are incredible parts of the book that could certainly be explored, so the action would be spread throughout all the story, and not reserved for only some parts.
Such as Seth's betrayal. It would be nice if we could see Seth from the time Dialla entered the school - and not as if he suddenly fell into the story - and also about their relationship - the lessons he gave her. Her father's interest in her, the sword that suddenly appeared, and her mother doesn't even say anything when Dialla questions about the present, and also Lance who has an interest in her, but only being mentioned in the story about three times before - all these facts could be more explored in the course of the story, connecting many points and bringing more emotion in the central part of the book. The action scenes that exist are fantastic, the way the writer described them, the feelings of Dialla, but if it were more extended and not reduced to a few chapters, it would make the book even more incredible.

I know this is only the first book (I don't know how many there will be), but I did miss the fire seal being the main focus of the book - after all this is the title of the book. The writer has a great main theme in her hands, but I felt that instead of writing more about how Dialla feels about being unique, or the seal's discoveries, the story was more focused on the romance. And from one point you really start to think more about the romance between Dialla and Dimitri than the whole world of magic itself and her unique and powerful seal. Like I said, probably all of this will be clearer in the other books, but I don't know. I think that when a person discovers that she may die, or that no one knows about her seal, she will become curious and begin to research about it. I didn't see Dialla doing this.
Another thing I remembered, the part of her being in a coma could be more explored. What she saw, what she lived, who she saw - this was a very important part of the story, and that was so much talked about previosly, but then when it happened, it soon ended and another drama was added.

I'm sure writing a book about magic must be very difficult, and believe me, you're going the right way, the way you describe the scenes, the spells. But a tip... be careful with some ideas because we can remember Harry Potter. I know it must be difficult, but it's something I have to warn you about (especially by reading the blurb of Book 2).

This is a excellent story, and you have a great talent - as I said, the construction of the character is fantastic, the description of the fights, the spells, and the main theme of the story is very good. Congratulations on the story, and keep writing! I'm anxious to know who Dialla will choose at the end (I hope it's Dimitri).

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Lily Louise and Jeffrey

Jeffrey's love for Lily is so beautiful and inspiring. The beautiful poem describes the various phases of a couple's life, but even with the fights and differences they overcome everything by love. It's inspiring! Congrats!!

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When I look at You

How can I comment on this story? It’s so beautiful and full of twists that make ya think about life, the love between two people and what you can cause in someone's life with your prejudices. This is certainly the lesson that this short but complete story tells us.
Kerry's life would be very different if she didn’t create this bad image about her father when she was a child, and that would change her parents' whole life and they could have been together.
But the story gives us so many messages about true love, love from parents to children and also about soul mates, Kerry and Blaine were certainly born for each other.

You will cry and you will fall in love with the characters, each of them.

The author has to stick to a few details, for example when Kerri is unable to speak to his mother, and leaves several voice messages; but then at another moment she’s able to call her mother and it’s as if she never tried to call; and then we go back to the point that she didn't speak to her mother. It’s a little confusing, but nothing that gets in the way of the story.

I just have to say congratulations to the author, and please read this story and fall in love with Blaine just like all of us did!!!!!

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The mechanic’s daughter

I loved it! I just read the book and I can only say how much it made me cry.

‘The mechanic’s daughter’ isn’t that traditional story about that crazy love that does crazy things, full of jealousy, and adventures. No! this story is about real life! It’s about being disappointed with the person you love, about family, death and with everything going on, you still have to continue to live.
Just as Cory was an idiot, so was Autumn! The two got hurt but this is real life, this is real love between real couples, and that’s what makes the story even better. I cried and made me think about what life is like, one minute you are planning to have lunch with that person and in the next hour they may be dead.

Now about things that got me confused... you need to decide on the surname of the characters ... sometimes you put Cory last name being Oliver and sometimes being Forest, as well as in various situations with Autumn.
And about the family's financial situation, it made me confuse. How could Autumn's mother be struggling with money when she got a share of Uncle Jamie's money? As well as Kendra working to buy a car if she kept the collections that the family had.

But I loved the plot and your writing! Looking forward to start reading one more of your books! Congratulations for the story !!!

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Book 1 - Bright Knight

Addictive! This is the description I have for this book.

The story of Alaine and Lucas is beautiful, and I wanted to have written a review as soon as I finished reading it, to be with the details lived in my memory, but I couldn't.

Alaine is a very real character, which I believe represents many women. While Lucas too! Her shy way, the way she thinks a lot of things but just decide to hide it, and also hiding her feelings... is how many people react. And Lucas's womanizing way, his whistles and his way of investing in Alaine but always around the edges... is also how many men are.

I love the way you write, Gigi! Congratulations! The descriptions of the people, the places, the thoughts of each one, make everything so real.

The only thing I found confused in this story is the time. For me it had been longer than only two weeks in all the story. I found this very surreal, it's as if the story doesn't match with the time.

Keep writing, Gigi!!!!! I'm looking forward to Book 2!!!

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Love planner

Since the first chapters of this book I was anxious to finish reading to write a review, cause the ones that are here don't say very much.

I'll start by saying that I loved the story, I loved the way the story isn't rushed and it follows a normal step for all the events (like in real life). So if you are looking for a fast step story, this is not the one for you.
I believe that everything happens in its perfect time, with the ups and downs, and the fact that everything is not rushed, holds your attention until the end of the story.

On the other hand, the characters should be better described, better presented (like the fact that one ex-boyfriend of Angela married her cousin, and I still didn't understand it right, because it wasn't explained).

I loved the MC. Angela is strong, determined, and it's not her love for Robert that makes her run to him like a dog in heat (seriously, I hate characters like that). No Angie is sweet but at the same time strong; quiet but at the same time speaks her mind; passionate but doesn't give up her values. And to think that Robert was a jerk in almost the entire book, she tried hard to discover his true self, and ends up finding a sweet and fun man.

The psychological side of the characters are easily discovered during the story, but not their physical characteristics. This is something that stands a little in the air, and bothered me.

The script is good, but there is a lot of work yet to be done, and many good parts of the story that can be developed.
I advise you to decrease the size of the chapters, which are excessively large, and also to make some interesting parts more descriptive, making the reader fall more in love with the story, and don't get bored.

The biggest problem I've encountered in this story is the inconsistencies, especially about time. It is very confusing how much time has passed from one event to another, and sometimes the information changes. Also some characteristics, for example in some chapter you say that the eyes of Angela are brown, and far ahead that they are of a deep blue. Try to organize the informations.

And grammar mistakes as well. I know you said that the book is under revision, but this occurs so much, especially the with punctuation mark.

But it's a great story, I'm sad that doesn't have an end, but ate the same time, happy that you're working on an upcoming book. You have talent, you just need to refine it. Don't give up! I've seen some rather mean reviews and comments here, but don't listen to them!! Keep on writing, and soon you'll be excellent!

I've seen that you want your book to be published, and I'm sure with a great review and some changes you may have a chance... as I said is a great story. Congratulations! And please don't make us wait too long for the next book, I'm anxious!!!

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Welcome to heartbreak

I just read this story and couldn't help but write a review. Let me just say, I loved it!
Despite some grammar mistakes, the plot makes you hypnotized and cannot stop reading. If you're going to start reading this story, you'd better have some free time, cause besides being very long, from beginning to end all events will trap you in a way that will make you unable to stop reading.

I loved the step of the story, all the descriptions that make you feel inside the story, all the whirlwind of emotions... but I think 900 pages was unnecessary. For all this, I imagined that much more things would happen, and some facts were stretched more than necessary.

But just read the story, I'm sure you too will love it!!!

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A Teenager Love Affair

What can I say? I started reading this book with an idea, and it turned out to be a totally different thing.... and I loved it!

At first I found the story a little bit fast step, but then everything started to make sense the way the author writes. It may not sound very ‘professional’ (it isn’t the word I wanted to use, but I have a temporary forgetfulness of proper words at the moment), but it's so fun to read, and you can clearly imagine everything that happened, with the mc narrating in the background.

'A Teenager Love Affair' is a story full of drama, and at the same time that you will laugh, you will also cry. Dennise goes through all the drama of a teenage life... broken heart, loneliness, choices, friendships, discoveries, love... everything we live in high school.
You will have fun with her adventures, you will suffer with her, you will get annoyed, but like in every good romance book, you will fall in love with her.

Congratulations on the story!

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RED

I followed this story from the beginning. I fell in love with the book 'A Devil for a Husband', and 'Red' was another story that caught me from the beginning.

I love the way the author wrote this story, even being in the third person, the story ranges from the view of Enrico and Kiana. And seeing the situation that each one lives, the difficulties, the secrets they hide, make the story electrifying. Believe me, you will not be able to stop reading.

But there is a however in all this. The plot is very good, but I felt that the author was very keen on on keeping the protagonists away, and when the secret of Kiana is finally revealed (without many details), the story ends. Her secret is the main focus of the story, the motive behind all the distance between the two, the betrayal of his family, and as you read the story, you are anxiously waiting for the moment when she will reveal it - or he will find out as it happened. But it seems that at this point the author wanted to 'get rid' of the story and just ended it.
Of course there is an end, but it was very fast. At first I didn't even believe it was the end, I just realized there would be no more chapters when the autor posted on her wall that that was the end.
I'm sorry, but it was a little disappointing, mainly because the story is so good and captivating.

But the story is good, worth reading. Mercy is a great writer with a great talent. I just feel that if she put a little more work into the final part of this story, it would look fantastic. Or else, Enrico discovering about Kiana's secret a few chapters earlier.

Congratulations on this story, I'm already looking forward to the next book, after all are all good!!!

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My mate is my Enemy

I loved this story! Quite different from most werewolf stories, but full of exciting and hectic parts. I just couldn’t stop reading, especially how the chapters are linked to each other.

The story takes a quick step, and some parts could be better explored, such as the final war, if June managed to kill the scientist, and how it was when she told Cy about her past.

There are also some grammar mistakes, especially when the POV is changed to the third person. It implies that in the middle of the story the author preferred to write in third person, but I think that you should have continued to vary between the perspective of Cy and June, since it was started this way.

Congratulations on the story!!!! And keep writing, I look forward to reading the next book!

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Marriage Partners

Love is something incredible. And you described how to love really is. To love is to feel sad, cry, and sometimes alone, but it’s also full of unique and incredible moments, full of joy and peace.
I just loved your writing style, it’s awesome!
Congratulations!

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The Arrangement

I loved the story! I couldn’t stop reading, the story caught me from the beginning to the end. The only thing I found strange is Emerson forget about Abigail so fast, and Madeline forget about Lucas .... but at the same time I know that the werewolf mark always drives them crazy for each other. In resume, great story! Congratulations!!!!

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Devil for a husband

I just loved this story! Details that make you imagine the scene that is happening, and I loved that the story has a coherent step with reality, no love at first sight, and love after three days. the characters are amazing too!

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