spatrick

review

Great start.

review

A unique twist on the vampire story.
It's still early, but the setup of the plot is effective.
the style is entertaining and the narrative moves at a nice pace.
A great start.

great start

Unique, likable characters.
Strong sense of place.
A good, fast narrative pace.
A few minor technical issues, but they didn't stop me from enjoying the story.
Well done.

review

A fast-paced story that doesn't waste time.
Well done.

excellent

Great sense of atmosphere and place.
Character development is motivated and natural.
There is a nice sense of dread creeping up in the main character's life.
Easy to read, which is harder to do than it sounds.
This writer is an artist.
Can't wait to read more.

great start

This writer has such a strong sense of artistry, world building and writing mechanics that i want to read more.
It's an easy read, the characters are likable and the plot, so far, is simple and effective.
One of the best written stories I've read on this site so far.
Extremely well done.

the next james joyce

Rises to Joycean levels of artistry.
Highly recommend.

great start

I love reading epidemic novels and this first chapter hits all the right points.
Brilliant researcher.
Deadly pathogen.
Small town.
My only concern, and its a small one, is a technical issue. More conventionally structured paragraphs would be easier to read.
Overall, I loved it.
The writer has a good ear for natural dialogue and a strong sense of pace.

well done

The family dynamic is a strong start that could go in 100 different, interesting directions.
Your technical skills are excellent.
The characters are real and relatable.
Well done.

good start

The world-building is solid.
The relationship between the two leads is friendly and real.
The mystery of the surface is clear and compelling.
Well done.

Edit

The fight scenes are tight and controlled and visceral. The action is brisk. And I'm invested in the friendship between the two lead characters. Quality work. Everyone should read this and learn how to write action.
Well done.

Edit

In chapter 10 now and, as always, a compelling, tragic story is building. I feel the impending doom but I'm not sure where it's coming from, and that's the mark of a good storyteller.

review of sleep

The plot was simple and uncomplicated. The story structure was effective. The narrative choices, especially chapters 4-6, were compelling. I would enjoy seeing this expanded into a full-length novel.

GREAT START

Great setup of character and plot. And just enough world building to put me there without slowing down the story. Not my usual genre, but I'm looking forward to more chapters.

The Suicide Club

The Suicide Club makes good use of the built-in drama of suicide.
Which characters will live or die gives the story a nice momentum that will keep you reading.
The multiple perspectives helps you to get to know the characters and sympathize with them.
I wasn't distracted by the minor grammar/punctuation issues.
I'm hoping to learn about Victor's phone call/secret plan.
Well done, Molly Miller.