Chapter 1
The dark is the only thing that surrounds me, the only thing that can save me is her. Just her. Her secrets, I can’t keep them hidden if I give them up how will I keep her safe I can’t hide her I’ll need her love and trust and loyalty and she’ll need to be strong I know this but how can I let her know that I would die if I could I can’t keep her in the dark all this time she will never recover although she will never learn to fight I would to protect her will she understand that she can’t keep them hidden forever.
In the end, will she understand if I don’t give them up how will I keep her safe When I wake up from this dream I remember a lot of details from the dream, the hands, the car, where she was. I remember that she was so pretty but I can’t see her face.
When I think about this dream I am sad because I am unable to remember her face I can’t remember her looks or the scent of her Dior perfume. I can only remember her voice she would always ask me about my friends that are usually bad if they are not doing well in school or if they have lost a game but she would always help me if she could in school.
When I think about it and I’m remembering the many details of this dream I can understand that this is an opportunity for me to face my fears. So I have to keep in mind what would happen if I am not strong enough and what would happen if I’m not able to keep my friends and family safe.
I’ll have to tell them in the end I have to find a way to explain everything. I can’t let anyone else lose trust in me. She has lost trust in me so I have to find a way to win it back.
“So it is always good to keep the girl happy, don’t forget that.”
Beep.
I got a new message I didn’t recognize it at first I knew it wasn’t from anyone; from my family or my friends. So I opened it and it was from "(707) 234 9926" I read the number aloud.
"I wish I could say it was from my parents and I hope they are doing well but I can’t do that I want to tell you something but I am sorry. I lost your sister this year in the war and I was really sad and confused I was confused why I lost her because she was sick when I heard that the Army was calling her I went home right away. I haven’t seen her since then I tried to find her but I lost her. I am very sorry for your loss ” I put the laptop down and stared at the wall.
“You knew?” I asked her. “Yes I was at home in North Carolina when they called me because she went out at night I got her back to the house but she went out again at night and they found her the next morning at the beach it was too late she was found naked and they didn’t know what happened to her.
I was shocked I didn’t know how to handle it it was a feeling I can’t describe it was horrible I was so happy for her just before she went out I kissed her and told her how much I loved her she didn’t want to hear it because she didn’t believe me she always thought that I didn’t love her as much as I do. She thinks she is sick and I had to do something to make her know she’s not sick.
“She died in the cold.” The man over the phone said coldly I need to find my family so I can get them to come to North Carolina so I can find her bones so I can bring her back. They knew about the war and they knew about her illness so they had to come to North Carolina to get her when she was reported missing.
They didn’t come when she was dying they didn’t know that she was going to die we never found her and we couldn’t put her in the car and drive back. I never got to put her on the bed where she hoped to be resting after her last visit.
I would have loved to do that for her I would have told her that she was still loved so much even after her death. She must have been so sad to die on the cold concrete outside. She must have died wishing she was back home.
“She is never going to be that girl again I can’t tell her that she is not getting over her death. I am not sure why but I have to find her and I need to talk to you so I can get some information from you .”
I finally said in reply I had to know what they were talking about I need to know what it is she wants from me “What happened to her ?” I asked
“We have no clue we are sorry to inform you but we speculate she was murdered,” The man said over the phone.
I closed the phone and leaned back. “That’s a lie,” I said softly. The phone rang again I went over to it and it was the same number
“No this is not my number it is my dead sister’s I know it because my family called me and told me that we lost a girl and she was raped and she had been murdered. We lost her because she lost trust in us and we lost her because of it.” A cold monotone voice said slowly.
“I need to go now I will call you later once I find out what you mean by that.”
I hung up on him I threw the phone across the room and stared at it angrily I hit the wall. I couldn’t talk to anybody about this it was just too painful and so emotional.
I took a hot shower and went to bed it had been a long day of driving and searching,
I just sat down to close my eyes. I opened my eyes and I was staring at the door looking at the man standing in front of it I shook my head to clear my thoughts it wasn’t a dream but, how.
I got up and went to the closet got a pair of shorts and a hoodie to cover my bra and went back into the room I went to the door but he had moved and was standing in front of the couch. I looked at him and shook my head slowly.
“Who are you and what are you doing in my dorm?”
“Well love, I am Xac your sister murdered, and yours as well ”
“You are a terrible liar this isn’t you, I have seen you and we are good friends .”
“No, I don’t know how this happened because I was with her”
“I was trying to protect you and your roommate this happened on her bed you see she and I was laughing she promised to bring me back she left and then I heard a scream I ran to the room and I saw her lifeless body on the floor, I wanted to be near her and there was blood everywhere and it was cold so I covered her with a blanket and ran to the dorm and I just wanted to get her out of there as fast as I could so I put her on the floor and covered her up with a blanket.
I thought she was still breathing but then I saw the knife and the empty bottle and the amount of alcohol she had and I knew she was gone, I was freaking out I called my friend to tell her that we had lost someone who I loved very much and she told me we lost her ” Xac said coldly
“So you thought it would be okay to take her and not tell anyone where you were just to avoid questions?” I screamed at him
“I did what I had to I just wanted to get her out of there I couldn’t let anyone see what I had done so I took her to a friend’s house I was mistaken,” Xac said in the most monotone voice I had ever had the misfortune of hearing.
“I can’t believe you right now Xac.
"Do you realize what this means for you?” I looked into my father’s eyes, following them over to Xac hoping they would soften, hoping for at least a glimmer of comprehension, but I saw only blankness.
“What do you mean?” I asked, suddenly overcome with panic. What did this mean? Was my father mad at me? I could hear the screams and pleas from my mother from the other room, my father was going to kill her, for letting Lexi go out and drink.
There was a knocking on the door, but my father’s anguished cries filled my ears, and I didn't hear the sound of the man on the other side of the door.
I was gripped with fear, I had no idea how to react to what was happening, all I knew was that my parents were dying and I was next. Xac walked towards the kitchen.
“Would you like some tea or some water?” Xac asked.
“Water would be great,” I replied.
I stared at Xac in disbelief. My father had snapped, he had abandoned his entire life to save mine, and here I was, sitting at my own kitchen table, debating whether I should just grab a bottle of booze and down it when my whole life was about to come crashing down.
I was in a haze, but I could hear Xac speaking to me in a very calming voice, as if he were soothing a frantic child who had just learned about Santa.
“Ali,” he said “we are going to get through this.
We have to get through this. You are family, your mother is family, and we have to do this together.
What you did today may be the bravest thing you have ever done. I can understand why it is difficult to keep your head in these times, but you can do this.
"You are strong and you can do it.” It was all I could do to just nod my head.
Was this Xac’s way of telling me that he had lost his mind?
He was trying to comfort me.
That’s what he always did, but what was he trying to comfort me with?
It was getting harder and harder to concentrate on what Xac was saying to me, I was beginning to lose the ability to form words.
What was going on?
