Chapter 1: the train
I rush forward, pushing my way through the crowd as the doors begin to close. My balance goes slightly as I reach the last step as I pull people, probably a bit too roughly, away from me.
I slam my hand down on the open doors button and jump inside... to see nothing. An empty carriage. Not even a view out the windows. Just pure blackness. It was dark outside, as midnights are, but not that dark. I turn myself around to check the other side. The darkness outside looks as if it has swallowed the rest of reality: no change in shade or texture to it. Just darkness. I reach for where the button should be, but my hand just flattens out on the plasticky wall.
The train starts up, and my confusion turns to panic. The sign above the door into the next carriage lights up, a message running across the screen: 'Please take a seat. Do not attempt escape. Next stop: Paddington Station.'
I obey the sign and sit in the nearest window seat, guessing I don't have much of a choice.
The lights flicker as the train continues to the next stop, dipping the train into the utter darkness every few seconds before blinding it with white light again.
I relax into my seat, slumping slightly as my brain accepts my new routine.
After what seems like hours, the left side of the train opens up into the darkness, letting it spill in as a figure steps into the light and sits themself down on the side opposite to me. A herd of figures, all made of the darkness, fill the carriage. They share their basic outline with humans, but lack any features or hair. They sit scattered throughout the train, but never next to each other. I slump further into the seat, attempting to hide, or at least appear dead.
The train 'doors' close up again and another message plays on the screen: 'Welcome. Next stop: Paddington.'
I sit back up slightly, turning around to look at the figure sitting behind me. They sit motionless, appearing more like a stationary shadow than a living creature. The blinding lights in the train don't seem to affect them, as I'm the only thing in the carriage that casts an, admittedly faint, shadow. My breathing becomes heavy, my heartbeat beating against my chest. 'Excuse me, but'-- the shadow tilts its head down to look at me-- 'Sorry. Where are we going?'
The creature doesn't reply, but a sickening feeling that it's staring into me enters my body. It begins to mirror my breathing before tilting its head back to its original position. I turn slightly to the right before realising the other shadows are staring at me, all mirroring my breathing: heavy and loud. The train fills with darkness again for the first split-second flicker.
For the first time, I'm relieved as the intense white of the lights burn into my eyeballs, reassuring me of my existence. Each figure, excluding the one behind me, has moved exactly one seat closer to me, staring into my soul with a life-threatening hatred that makes me wish I hadn't lived through the first flicker.
I leap forward as the second flicker starts, running to where I'm guessing the 'doors' opened at the last stop. I don't stop running. I can't stop running. Not while it's dark.









hi I just read this chapter the story seems to be there, and ready to emerge. A couple of notes, it feels like your describing the story instead of telling it. in places it feels as though you don't allow enough room for the readers imagination to take over and that can also effect the flow of how its read.
that said it has got potential and I look forward to reading further