Enjoyable

"I read the first bits of your story and am enjoying it so far. Romance isn't really my preferred area, but I figured I would try and give you some feedback. The idea of the couple being separated by the car accident is very sad. In the first chapter, you do an excellent job of conveying Matthew's grief toward the loss of Jenny and his sexual struggles. Your dialogue in the next chapter was very sweet, until everything went horribly wrong. I think my favorite part of this story so far are the visuals you use and your ability to show rather than tell. You never had to tell us that Matthew was well-off, you showed it to the reader by giving us a look at the inside of his house. I feel like you do a good job conveying Matthew's character just by that scene in front of the mirror and the little snippets of dialogue/monologue. You also did a good job of conveying the scene between him and his lover without getting overly graphic. As a reader that's not super into romance, I appreciated that. Sometimes less is more. When I first started reading the story, I skipped the synopsis. It may be just me, but it felt like a spoiler to have that right at the beginning. I'm not sure why you put it there, but I would just delete it and let the story itself sink its hooks in. Your first chapter has enough draw that it should be able to entice readers. :-) Also, while I liked the snippets of dialogue in chapter one, I thought it was weird that Matthew was just walking around the empty house talking to himself. If I were you, instead of having him talk out loud, maybe use italics and make that a sort of interior dialogue. A way of letting the reader tap into his thoughts. I think it would be much more natural that way. Other than that, the only thing I noticed were little issues with the grammar here and there. I think it's an excellent start to a very enjoyable story. I hope that this helps, and I hope you get lots of readers. Good work!"