Dark Illusions

“I am a hero.” I need to be a hero. Or, at the very least, a good, normal(ish), albeit with powers human, like the magic-less ones in the big cities. Because if I can’t be, and if they find out, if they catch me, they will kill me.

“I am a hero.” I repeat quietly as I practice my magic, smiling as I see Aldolfina, my cat, leaping around as she tries to catch my illusions that are flying from the page: golden butterflies, at a height she can still swat at them. I concentrate a little harder and make a forest appear, one with lush green grass and a pond with crystal clear water. The rocks at the bottom- I put them there to solidify the illusion- are pure black on one half and on the other, white. Fish swim in the water, all colours, and two pink dolphins with silver stars accompany them.

Wait. No. The stars- they’re not all silver. One is black on each, in the very centre of the tail. A symptom of a villains black, polluted magic. I vanish it, but even after it is gone I cannot stop thinking about it. The urgency for me to rid myself of black magic is getting bigger by the day. The exams are coming up, and if I don’t preform with perfectly pure magic, there will be consequences. I repeat it to myself again. “I am a hero. Not a villain. A hero.”

Just then my brother comes into the room. “Show off.” He says, smirking.

“You would know.” I reply. “Anyway, I’m not. I’m practicing. For the exam.”

Alaric rolls his eyes. “Whatever. Mum said to tell you dinners ready.”

“Oh.” I reply. “Sorry, Aldolfina. I’ve not got enough power to keep this big an illusion going while I’m doing something else too. But- tell you what- bring the book through, and you can play with the butterflies while I’m eating.”

Aldolfina replies with a long meow.

Alaric looks up from his phone “She says she can’t carry it. It’s too chunky for her.”

“Oh, well. That’s a shame. I cant take it- I’m already carrying all my revision papers.”

“Wait, Devy, can’t you just.... I don’t know, do it without the book?”

I shake my head. Theoretically, I could, but the book helps me to focus my energy, to focus on the words to do with what I want, instead of the thing itself. A dictionary, in particular, like the one lying on the floor, is best because it has most of the words in the chosen language- English, mostly, for me, but occasionally French or German.

“I can’t.” I answer. “Not yet.”

I put Aldolfina on the head, gather up my papers, and go to the kitchen.

When I get there, I dump the papers on the table. They thud loudly.

Mum looks up at me. “Devymayi. You’re late!”

And that’s when I see her. Ms Daniels. The head of the magic Council. And suddenly I understand. This is the interview, only mum ticked the ‘come early’ box for it on the form because sometimes can’t talk if I feel uncomfortable. Mum calls says I’m Selectively Mute. I call it ‘Not wanting to be bullied by Gabriella’, which is what it is. I don’t want her to hear. If she hears, she’ll ruin my life. And if I do it at school, she will hear. Super hearing must be useful for a future villain- even one without polluted magic... Like me.

But, I remind myself, I can’t think of that right now. I need to concentrate on the questions. And the Practical practice. The videoed one. I gulp.

Ms Daniels starts talking about three seconds after I sit down.

“So, Miss Hemlock.” she says. “What would you like to do when you’re older?”

Oh, god. I worry to myself. I have no idea what an illusionist can even do...

“Uhh, well, I don’t know” I mumble. Mum... What jobs could I get? I mean, like, what jobs can an illusionist get?

No reply. “Maybe- a... Therapist? Like making illusions to calm people?”

Why did I say that? What about being a hero?

“Don’t be silly, Devy.” Mum butts in, before turning to Ms Daniels. “What she really wants to be is a hero. But, for some reason, she thinks it’s a silly idea, and won’t talk about it anymore.”

Ms Daniels writes something in the little notebook she carries and nods. “And, Miss Hemlock...”

The next hour is nothing but a blur. I don’t really pay attention to what is being asked, just answering without thought. I vaguely remember saying I prefer to use a book, a dictionary to help concentrate on what I’m creating, but nothing else. And then I have to create something. Anything, Ms Daniels says. Anything I want. But I need my book. I’m about to go and get it when, as if on cue, Alaric walks in with it, along with Aldolfina. “Good luck.” He murmurs as he places the book on the ground. “She scares me.”

When he leaves I start, creating the same world as earlier, bit by bit. The butterflies come first, gold, mainly, but other colours too. Then the grass, speckled with tiny flowers. The pond appears next, nestled neatly beside a small hill. I add the fish and dolphins, taking extra care to not add any black.

Then the trees sprout from the ground, tall pines and oaks. I make a few foxes that run about the grass, and a cave with a bear sleeping half inside. I’m about done, but then I decide to add a few nests and birds to fly about as an afterthought. As rabbits start to hop through the grass, I look up. “Im finished.” I announce, scooping up Aldolfina. “How- How did I do?”

Mum says nothing, but smiles. Ms Daniels, on the other hand, is frowning.

“Hemlock. Well, well, well. You did well I suppose, and the illusion looked real, but by this stage you shouldn’t have to use a focus object. Still, your attention to detail was good, and it was... Pretty. 6/10. How did you choose what to create?”

I nod at Aldolfina. “She likes butterflies. And I made a meadow earlier.”

Ms Daniels doesn’t stop frowning. “It’s on film, and you answered the questions. Id better get going now. Good luck with the hero thing. Keep practicing. You might have a slim chance if you do.” She pauses and turns to face us again “and, stop using the book! You can do it without the focus object! You are old enough.”

Once Ms Daniels has left, mum comes over and hugs me. “That was amazing, you know that? And there’s nothing wrong with a focus object. I used one until I was 23. No one cared. Anyway, when you were busy, Alaric got cake to celebrate!”

The cake- chocolate with toffee icing- is huge. We all have a big slice, and in the morning I take some to school.

School. Usually I dread Wednesdays- most of my classes are with Gabriella – but today I don’t. Maybe it’s the cake, or the fact that my practical will probably be ok. That all changes at lunch time.

When I get my lunch box out, Gabriella somehow notices straightaway, and comes storming over to my seat.

“What’s that?” she says nastily. “Cake, is it?”

“Yes....” I reply warily

“Its quite big, isn’t it. Let me take some off your hands.”

I shake my head.

“Don’t be greedy, Devymayi. It’s one of the reasons no one likes you.”

The cake starts floating. She must be using her telekinesis. But why?

I find out soon enough, because she splats it into my face. Then she does it again. And again.

Eventually I decide I have enough. She’s being a bully, I think, so I’ll give her a taste of her own medicine. I just need to make her angry.... And perhaps scared. Yes, that would serve her right.

Spiders begin to appear all around her from the tiles on the floor. They’re mostly white, but all are partially speckled with small, hole-like dots, grey, which have another dot in the middle. Almost all of the dots are white, but a small circle in the centre of each ones’ back is black.

Dark magic.

Gabriella seems to notice at the same time as me, because as I do, she screams. The spiders start to swarm her, but before she faints, she utters one last word. “VILLIAN!”

I watch until the spiders disappear. When they do she is gone. Devoured.

And then I run.

When I come back a day later, everyone knows. At first they stare. And then magic control come from nowhere, ready to chase me. They hold handcuffs and an Anti-Magic mask. I make the illusion of another me, and cloak myself so I look like I’m not there. The other me moves to the school doors and I make my escape from the back exit. But before I leave, I leave my parting gift. The dark spiders.

As I write all this twenty years later, in my secret room, I know I will die. They will find me, even if they have not yet, and they will kill me. I briefly ruled the world. But all good things come to an end. I have only one more thing to say.

To all who have dark magic inside – embrace it.

Because I dreaded it, but being a villain wasn’t as bad I thought it would be.