short story for lost students

University is hard.

I never thought I would say that one day.

All my life I’ve waited for college because it meant freedom and independence. But I guess those three things don’t come as a package like I used to think. I have college, that thing I got for sure. Let’s say I have partial freedom, I can do pretty much what I want, when I want but I still live at home so scheduled dinners and letting my mother know about my every move it is. As for independence, we’re not quite there yet.

I want to make my own money, have my own apartment, my own life. Most people will say I am still young, and I have time to make it all happen. Which, in theory, I know I do. But whatever age you are doesn’t determine the way you should be living. You want to live at your parents’ house until you’re 30? Fine. You want to get a job and live by yourself as soon as you turn 18? Also fine. You want to work a 9 to 5 office job? Do as you please. As long as you know what you want, you just have to work towards it, right?

Being 19, enrolled in a university, living with mom and dad in my hometown is what I thought I wanted. I thought I wanted to live at home, so that my parents wouldn’t spend extra money on me and would then pay to send me abroad my third year of college. But is it really what I want now? Do I want to wait two full years before my parents can pay for my year abroad? Do I want to wait to get a job and make money?

The truth is I don’t. I don’t want to wait. I want to move out my parents’ house. Get a job. Save some money. Buy a plane ticket and start living. I’ll be a waitress wherever they need one, a cleaning lady for whatever hotel, a babysitter for kids who need to be picked up from school. I’ll stay in cheap hostels and eat plain pasta 2 times a day, 7 days a week, 4 weeks a month and 12 months a year.

Most importantly I’ll be free. Free to move to whatever country I want to. Free to meet new people and build new relationships. Free to explore, learn and discover.

But am I being unreasonable for thinking I could ever live this way? Will it even work? And how will it work out on the long term? Will I be able to do it without any college education?

I might disappoint you, but I don’t have any answers. I don’t know if it’s possible, if it’ll work out or even if that’s what will make me happy.

But isn’t living supposed to be all about taking risks and improvising from there?