Chapter 1
Josh and Andrea were high school sweet hearts. They met at a coffee shop they both worked right down the road from the school they went to. Andrea was a senior in high school and she was the Cheer Captain for the Texas rangers. Josh was a Junoir in high school and he was on the Varisty football team. Josh was a quaterback who loved to put in hardwork and effort. Josh never gave up on any of his dreams. Andrea was on the Varisty cheerleading team and gotten the title of Cheer Captain her Junoir year.
Josh was driving Andrea to work after their long and tiring day at school. When Andrea tried to open the door Josh locked the car doors after he got out of thr car and walked around to the passenger side of the car where Andrea was unlocked the car doors and opened the car door for Andrea. "You didn't have to go through all that trouble just for me ya know" says Andrea. "Yeah I know but your daddt told me that if I didn't treat his princess right he would beat me up for it." Says Josh. As soon as Andrea was ojt of the car she felt l
Josh and Andrea started dating their freshman and sophmore year of high school. Josh was the old school type of guy who liked to open the car door for Andre and make her feel like she was the only girl in the world. Josh and Andrea always found time to hang out even though they were both so busy trying to chase their dreams.
Andrea always knew she wanted to be a teacher and Josh wanted to work in construction and their relationship has always worked beacuse they both love and trust each other. They couldn't bear the other one tonget hurt.
Andrea had to skip school Thursday morning for her yearly check up and she asked Josh if he wanted to come with. josh said, "Yes just to make sure she was ok." What they didn't reliaze was that their life was going to change upside down that d
I think the story has promise. You just need to add depth to the story. It looks like you have a lot of great plot points, but show us their meeting in the coffee shop. Make an entire scene around it where he walks in and sees this beautiful girl across the room. Or anything that moves you. Instead of telling us josh was the old school type, write out scenes showing him acting in that way. Maybe they go out somewhere and show him holding the door open. Like I said, you have a good direction, but show it all. You could take this small chapter and turn it into a 1000 word chapter or more just writing the scene where they meet in the coffee shop. But dont be discouraged, it took me over five years to finish my first draft of my first book. It takes a lot of time and patience. I wish you the best of luck.