The Grim

Elias POV

Gardner, Massachusetts - Autumn - 1908

Being autumn the weather is still pleasant and not as unbearable as the winter. Usually around this time, it would be raining. I thought that I might be on a spree of good luck because I was not.

Although winter is coming which is always the worst time of year for Shadow and I. Each year we come close to dying with no one thinking of us and no help given.

Everyone else is bundled up in front of a warm fire. While Shadow and I share one thin scruffy blanket. The blanket doesn’t even come close to covering all of me. I give most of the blanket to Shadow.

Shadow is a handsome dog. Fur the color of onyx. Eyes that show pain but are a warm golden yellow. Occasionally while lying down Shadow will have his tongue hanging out to the side of his mouth.

The corner of his mouth turned up like he just heard a funny joke. Half a smile was shown on his muzzle. He doesn’t do this often but when he does it brings a huge smile to my face. He currently has that look on his face and I smile in tandem.

The appealing smell of hay in the air mixed with the scent of fresh-cut grass envelops my senses bringing me out of my thoughts.

There is also the faintest hint of roses coming from the bushes lining the perimeter of the backyard. It brings to me a kind of cozy peacefulness. Peace is a luxury that didn’t come to me often.

I feel the chilly wind ruffle my shirt. I look over to Shadow as the same breeze tousles his black fur. Shadow’s eyes are closed as if he’s trying to feel one moment of tranquility.

Tranquility is something Shadow doesn’t experience often. Shadow’s head tilts back and his nose is up in the air sniffing away just as I did.

The sounds of the horses snorting and mouth noises cause me to relax. Again this is a strangeness because I always have to be vigilant. I sit with my back against the door of one of the horse stables.

There are five stable doors altogether. Four are for the horses. The fifth I use for Shadow and I. Each stall is larger than one would think. The stable opens out with an awning on the top which is open over a windowless entrance.

The whole stable is open to the elements. When needed there are barn doors to pull across the entrance. However, they are flimsy, often stuck, and almost blow in with a strong breeze.

The backyard of the estate has elaborate gardens and multiple fountains. It had vibrant plush green grass. Grass that would be comfortable to lay on and observe the stars. Also soft enough to take a nap on.

Although I know better not to step foot out of the stables. How I longed to sleep on that grass instead of the hard floor of the stables or the hay that poked my skin.

The back of the manor had a staircase on the left and right leading up to the rear entrance. The walls were made up of a light-colored red brick with the bottom half covered in ivy.

There are six pillars on top of the roof. I assume that it’s the fireplaces the maids talk about.

The closest I have ever come to fire are the ones that are in lanterns. The maids bring down my scraps at night to not interfere with their daily work. Which is when I could observe the lanterns. I don’t get the extravagance of a lantern or daily food.

There was a party going on in the estate today. I can hear the music coming from the ballroom. Even as far as I am at the back of the grounds. I hummed along to the tune not even knowing correctly how it went but I did it anyway.

I tapped the beat gently on Shadow’s hind leg. Shadow turned quickly and put his mouth on my hand pressing his canines into me in warning. Shadow let me go. The message he sent to me was clear.

I was never allowed inside the house. Or anywhere else on the property really besides this stable. I would love to have danced in the ballroom. Or make idle chatter with strangers. Even a simple greeting of shaking hands was something that appealed to me.

Watching in the distance I saw people in their fancy spotless clothes talk amongst themselves with the occasional loud fake laugh. My clothes were anything but spotless they were not even holeless.

I pull on my shirt and inspect it while sticking a finger through a hole. Sticking my finger in each hole and counting them. Although I only knew how to count to ten. There were many more holes than that. Each hole is one too many. Especially when the winter chill sets in.

Not even my porcelain skin was spotless. It has a thick layer of black grime. The knots in my hair are large almost making up one huge one. I run my hands through my fingers it gets stuck. I have to disentangle them trying to bring about the least possible pain to myself.

I’m sure these people smelled of perfumes and cologne. While I smelled of hard work and neglect. I lifted my armpit smelled myself and gagged. How I longed to have a bath. Even just one.

To feel how the warm water caressed my skin. To even know what warm water felt like.

Occasionally Shadow was given a bowl of cold water. When Shadow was done I would drink the rest. Shadow didn’t seem to mind.

Sometimes I would dip my finger into the water just to feel what it was like. To me, it felt soothing. Especially when the cold water spilled down my throat on a summer day.

These rich people had shoes. I never knew what it was like to wear shoes. My feet are hardened on the bottom and coarse. One of my toenails was off because a horse stepped on it. Maybe if I had shoes I wouldn’t have lost the toenail.

I looked over to Shadow and thought about him again. We are exactly alike. Neither one of us had a name until I gave us each one. I named myself after the last stable keep I thought it sounded nice.

I gave Shadow his name because he was as dark as the blackness of night. I have to be careful not to say Shadow’s name to anyone else. I’m scared if they know how close we are they would take him away.

I observe Shadow closely. Shadow’s ribs are sticking out. He is covered in filth. His hair is matted in many places. I wouldn’t be surprised if Shadow was covered in fleas. I’m surprised I didn’t have them myself. Shadow’s nails are so long they are starting to curl inward. It’s surprising he can even walk.

In the beginning, when Shadow was a puppy he let me pet him. Unfortunately, Shadow was beaten, kicked, and treated like he was nothing. Except for me, I would never hurt him. As he grew he became aggressive. Rightfully so. Once Shadow became an adult we began hating each other. I hated Shadow because all I wanted was a friend.

Shadow hated me out of fear. We slept at opposite ends of the stable. Both of us would avoid each other. Which was sad because we were the same. A pair with identical misfortunes.

Things changed when one night I saw Shadow wasting away. I couldn’t handle seeing Shadow like this. I whistled to the dog and threw a scrap of my scrap toward him on the ground.

Shadow walked over to him his head hanging down low. He didn’t take his eyes off of me. He growled the whole time he was eating his food. Seeing how Shadow needed the food more I threw the rest of it to him.

Every time I receive food I would give Shadow the lying share. Shadow still won’t let me pet him. When I get up the courage I’m awarded a nip on the hand.

Occasionally, I steal some oats from the horses to feed Shadow and me. If I was caught I would be whipped and starved.

I grew to love Shadow. Shadow is my everything. My reason for waking up in the morning. The reason I still had hope in my heart. The one thing I could count on to make me smile. The one thing I would die to protect. My one reason to endure.

There looked to be a few young men coming this way. I was always told to stay out of sight. I whistle sharply to Shadow. Shadow followed me to the back of the stables. “Sit,” I told Shadow. His voice came out scratchy because I was not used to speaking often.

“There is supposedly a young man that lives out here.” One young man says to the others.

“People say the young man is attractive. He has stunning green eyes and a slender but muscular build. He has strong built shoulders. Also, he is tall around six two! He’s huge. All the maids whisper secrets about him.” A young man says.

Another young man with a strange accent pipes up “Ye, Six Two sounds gigantic!” I look down on myself. Holding out my arms and hands I look down at them. I walk over to the back of the stables and put my back on it. I put my hand on my head and step around to see how high my hand is.

Agreeing to myself that it does look high up on the stable. I grab my shoulders and squeeze them. I look down at Shadow and shrug. Shadow just gives me a blank stare. I could almost feel how Shadow found me pathetic.

I listened as the young men petted the horses. “This white horse is a beauty. What was her name again?” One asked the other. Her name is Cloud. Master Elworth let me name her. I wished I could discuss it with them.

To tell them things I know about the horses. Which one liked its ears scratched? It was Colt the black horse. How the chestnut brown horse named Sticks likes his rear patted as if he was a good boy. I would teach them how to brush them the correct way. Maybe even show them how to ride one in case they never have before.

I knew how to ride I was just never allowed to do it. I wished I could. To speed along the grassy fields the breeze whipping your face. The rush of it lets your mind forget your sorrows. I didn’t have much to make me forget besides my work.

“Let’s go see the graveyard.” One of the men pipes up. I could hear footsteps coming around the stables. They were all about to pass without noticing me until Shadow sneezed. Their heads whipped towards them.

How it must be nice to go wherever you want whenever you please. A simple walk around the grounds of the estate. To know what it’s like to simply be free.

The three men stop and pivot to face them. Up close their clothes seemed a bit ridiculous. Weird pants that are larger at the thigh but thin on the bottom. Each man here had a weird loose coat with a lined pattern.

Although I disliked how the coat looked I still wish I had one. They were also wearing strange tall black hats. I found them humorous and wanted to laugh at seeing them.

Not knowing what to do I just stare at them. I know better than to move and I avoid eye contact. My fear for Shadow makes me keep watch of him out of the corner of his eye.

As soon as they start to walk towards me Shadow is no longer sitting and is on all fours with his hackles up. Every step that they take Shadow’s growl gets louder. Shadow looks scary when he is like this.

I know Shadow would never hurt me as he might others. That doesn’t mean Shadow’s growl didn’t cause a chill down my spine. I snap my fingers loudly which causes Shadow to stop growling.

The young men are ignoring Shadow their attention on me. The blonde one has a more sinister look in his eye. This one wants to cause trouble. I know if the position was reversed I would try to make friends not bully.

They assume that I’m the bigger threat here. Which just shows them how wrong they are. Shadow is the violent one.

The blonde-haired young man once he gets closer starts waving his hand in front of my face. The blonde-haired one starts curling his nose and moving his head to turn away from me.

“Ugh, he smells awful.” Well, what does one expect someone to smell like when they can’t bathe and have to shit in a hole behind the stables.

“I think he’s the one father has been talking about. Father said his mother slept with Sir Elworth. His mother was an Irish maid. This is Elworth’s bastard son. Rumor is Lady Elworth had her killed off. Elworth begged his wife to keep him out of sympathy. Lady Elworth agreed. But look at the state of him. He is treated just like a slave.” Says the brown-haired one.

“He is Irish, a mick!” The red-haired man with a strange accent says. What does that even mean?

The blonde-haired one comes closer. “You’re right he is. He’s a mix just like his bitch dog.” He starts laughing loudly. Then the red-haired one joins in.

Shadow is perfect just the way he is. My temper is beginning to grow. Which is strange because I didn’t even know I had one. It’s never appeared before.

“What do you mean mixed?” The red-haired one says. “He is English and Irish. Similar to his dog that is not a pure breed.” The blonde-haired one says while not taking his eyes off me. I’m English and Irish? I don’t seem different than anyone else I’ve seen. Just how I’ve been treated.

“But the maids are right, those eyes. They are eerie. Creepy even. They are so green it seems as if they glow.” The brown-haired one says.

“Can you understand us?” The blonde-haired young man asked loudly. Of course, he can. The stable keep before him taught him basic English. This was in case he needed to communicate about the horses.

Master Elworth used to come down every day to have a chat with me. But that stopped once I reached the manhood of sixteen. I’m twenty now. A few of the maids even made small talk with me. Choosing to act as if I couldn’t understand them to try and avoid extra trouble.

“Look he’s stupid too.” The young men laughed. I became upset and overwhelmed from learning about my parents if I could even call them that. As well as I was cross at this young man who had been insulting me.

It is making my insides revolt against me. There is a burning heat blazing from my skin seeping out from my pores. I never felt this way before yet I knew what to call it, anger.

The blonde-haired young man came over to me and snapped his fingers in my face loudly. This didn’t stir me but it did excite Shadow. Shadow began growling loudly.

The blonde-haired young man kicked Shadow. Hearing Shadows yelp of pain caused fury in me and I launched myself at the young man.

My fist shot out and connected with the blond-haired young man’s face. The force of the hit caused the blonde one’s face to turn harshly.

I pelted his face again this time I felt the crack of the man’s nose breaking under my fist. I reared up two more times punching him in the eye and the side of the cheek.

Not feeling I was done with him I drew back and punched him in the gut. This feeling this high felt beyond incredible. To be rid of my frustration in a few hits felt addicting.

Hitting him felt so good I wanted to do it again. I knew though for each damage afflicted was another whipping. I had never hit anyone in my life but now I have come to like it.

The red-haired young man went to attack me but Shadow was quick to react and latched himself onto his arm.

Shadow was drawing blood the red-haired young man was swinging his arm trying to throw Shadow off of him.

I stood and then moved away from the blonde-haired young man. In the next moment, I whistled sharply. Shadow let go of the red-haired young man’s arm and came to sit behind my right leg.

The brown-haired young man grabbed the blonde-haired one and lifted him off the ground. The blonde-haired one looked woozy and like he was going to fall over. He had blood gushing from his nose. His perfect spotless white outfit was now stained with blood.

The red-haired young man was crying out from the pain in his arm. He was holding it to his chest. I watched as they all quickly left going back to the manor.

The relaxing feeling Shadow and I were experiencing the calm before the storm. I knew we were now in a great deal of trouble. There would be no more peace in my foreseeable future. Hopefully, there could still be some for Shadow. I will do my best to see to it.

I knew any minute they would be coming for us. I walked back over to the front of the stable and Shadow followed closely. Opening the door to the stall I let Shadow in and closed the door.

“Sit. Stay.” I commanded of Shadow. Closing the door in an attempt to keep Shadow safe. There was nothing else I could do but stand here dreading the punishment I knew would come.