Lost (revised)

Owen

BEEP BEEP BEEP BE-

The sound of my obnoxiously loud alarm is stopped by the crash of my hand on the snooze button. I turn around and snuggle in for just another five minutes before I get up.

BEEP BEEP BEEP BEE-

“Can you please get up for the love of God Owen.” After snoozing for a second time, I slowly realize I fell back asleep. I hear my roommate continue to groan from his side of the room. “You do this every fucking morning man. I just want to sleep in peace for once.”

Guess I better get up then, if I don’t want to face the wrath of my roommate any further.

But my bed is sooo warm on this chilly November morning. I can feel my eyelids drooping slowly as sleep takes over once again.

BEEP BE-

“OWEN!” said wrath is accompanied by a pillow thrown my way. I can’t wait for Christmas break. Sadly, it’s still a couple weeks away and I have to get up to go to class.

“Alright. Alright. I’m getting up.” I announce as I stretch out in my bed. “No need to get violent, jeez” I mumble as I slowly sit up and rub the sleep from my eyes. This semester has been kicking my ass. You’d think this being my third year that I would get used to the lack of sleep, but man am I tired.

I get up and take my towel to the shared bathroom and join the other sleep deprived students on this Tuesday morning. I clean myself and go back to my room to get dressed. I’m careful not to make too much noise since my roommate managed to fall back asleep. I grab my bag and my coat, then leave the room for my first class before I’m late.

I arrive to class just on time and I scan the room for the familiar head of brown locks. I spot Heather in the back and make my way towards her through the quickly filling seats. As I reach her, I see the usual cup of coffee sitting by the empty seat next to her.

“You know I love you right?” I announce as soon as my ass touches the seat. I carefully take a sip of the hot beverage before turning my face to see her with an unimpressed eyebrow up and her eyes squinting my way.

“Are you professing your love to your coffee or me?”

“My coffee obviously H” I answer with a quick smile as I try to dodge her poking fingers coming my way. “I’m kidding! I’m kidding!” I squeak out to make her stop her torture. When she retreats, satisfied with my answer, I add in a mumble “You totally make the top two after the coffee.”

Thankfully, the start of class saves me from further violence. As class drones on, I have to try not to fall asleep. When Heather nudges me awake for the third time after the first hour, she shoots me a concerned look. I should probably get a nap in before my next class if I want to make it through the day.

“Are you okay man? You look dead on your feet.” She asks me at the end of class, while we make our way towards the door.

“Yeah, just tired. I can’t wait for the end of this semester. I seriously need sleep.” I yawn halfway through my sentence, and I rub my eyes to try and get myself to wake up. “I’m going back to my room after we get something to eat to nap before my next class. Hopefully that’ll help me.”

“Yeah, that’s probably a good idea. I won’t be there to wake you up later.” We make our way to the campus café to get ourselves some food.

There’s a line when we get there so we chat while we wait. When it’s our turn, I let Heather order first. Once she’s done, I walk up to the cashier and give him a small, tired smile. His name tag reads Zach. Huh, he’s kind of hot. Strong features, nice smile, pretty blue eyes. God has favorites for sure.

“Hi! What can I get for you today?” He asks with a big smile. Huh, dimples too.

“Hi, I'll take a bacon grilled cheese please.”

“Anything else?” The cashier asks me with the same wide grin. Damn, someone’s happy today. Good for him, I guess. Right! He asked me a question.

“Umm... no... no that’s it thanks.” I finally answer him when my brain catches up. Jesus, I need sleep. I pay and make my way to the side with Heather while we wait for our food.

When my order gets called, I walk over and take my sandwich. I notice something written on the napkin. A note from the cashier with his number. When I look up, I catch his eyes and he winks at me before helping the next customer.

“Did that guy just give you his number?” Heather says reading the note over my shoulder.

“Yeah… yeah I think he did” If I wasn’t half asleep, I’d probably be blushing.

“Damn, even when you look like shit you still pull. I’m a little jealous. That guy was really hot” We slowly make our way out and walk on the path that takes us towards the building where Heathers class is situated.

“Stop it, you get plenty of attention from guys.” I tell her with a light shove to her shoulder. The girl is gorgeous, long wavy brown hair, big light brown eyes, and a body to kill for. She could have a date with a different guy every week if she wanted.

We stop a little way down the sidewalk before we split up for the rest of the day. “Alright, text me when you get to your room. I’ll see you later!”

We hug and make our way to our respective buildings. On the way back, I mull over the idea of texting Zach. Maybe later tonight. Maybe not. He was pretty cute.

What if I don’t text him and then I have to face him every time I want food or a coffee. What if I do text him and I totally embarrass myself. That’s even worst. Either way, it’s a decision for the Owen of after my nap.

I nibble at my food on the walk over. I’m too exhausted to eat more than half before I reach my building. I throw my cold food in the trash by the doors and make my way up.

While going up the stairs, my phone starts ringing, and I instantly recognize my brother’s ringtone. We’ve always been really close, and we try to catch up at least once a week since we’re both busy. I don’t even have time to say hello before I hear his happy voice in my ear.

“Owen! How you doin’ today lil bro?”

“Hey, Kev. I’m good.” I try to give some life to my voice. “What’s got you so happy?” I turn the subject back to him, so he, hopefully, doesn’t notice I’m half asleep and already dreaming about the warmth of my bed.

“Oh! I just got some really good news! Wanna know?” By the sound of his voice, he’s going to tell me even if I say no. He’s that excited.

“Sure, hit me.” I finally get to my door and let myself in. Once inside my room, I put him on speaker phone and take off my shoes, pants and shirt before throwing myself on my bed. I take the time to quickly send a text to Heather, confirming I got home okay.

“Brandon’s coming back home for Christmas!” he announces in a sing-song voice. The excitement makes total sense now. Brandon hasn’t been back since last May. He’s been friends with my brother, and consequently me, since we were children. We're only 2 years apart, so I always ended up hanging out with them when he came over to our house. He and my brother both left for the military when they turned 18. My brother had to leave after he got hurt while overseas and lost part of his leg 2 years ago. Brandon stayed and comes back home every couple of months. “And before I forget, he’ll be staying with us in the other guest room, I figured you wouldn’t mind.”

Shit

Shit

Shit, shit, shit

This is not good.

I’m supposed to stay with my brother during winter break. And don’t get me wrong, I’m so so happy that Brandon’s back. The only problem is that I might have developed a tiny tiny crush on him over the years. I mean puberty and military conditioning really didn’t help me get over this crush. He’s always been good looking but there’s something about a guy in uniform. On his last visits, I only saw him a handful of times and I could somewhat control my crush. But living with the guy? God help me.

“Omg that’s really great Kev! I can’t wait to see him.” I really hope the fake excitement in my voice is realistic. “Hey, I’ll call you back later this week, I’m going to take a nap before my next class.” And, you know, freak out a little!

“Oh, yeah yeah sure. The end of the semester is always wrought on sleep. We’ll catch up later. Love you!”

“Love you too Kev” I hang up and shove my head in my pillow. “Urrgh whyyy, why me..!” I turn on my back and stare at the ceiling. “This is fine! Everything is going to be fine! You won’t embarrass yourself, you’re both grown adults. You can totally coexist in the same space without anything going wrong!" Dragging my hand down my face, I continue my existential crisis. "Right? Yes! For sure. Mmhmm yep yep yep.” Thankfully my roommate isn’t here to hear this pathetic pep talk happening right now.

After staring at the ceiling for who knows how long, I finally fall asleep.

I definitely didn’t dream about a certain grey eyed guy. No sire.