CHAPTER 1
I’ve always loved TV and movies. There are so many reasons why: the bonding between friends, family, and even society as a whole; the adventures we can take to other worlds, other times; having the choice to zone out and turn our brains off, or watch intently and analyze deeply.
I could go on and on, but I’ll spare you. The point I’m getting at is— when I found myself working behind-the-scenes of a real Hollywood production, I had a lot of big feelings.
Granted, I was working the craft services table, but. You’ve gotta start somewhere, right?
It’s my third day and the butterflies in my stomach are still fluttering as I wipe my hands on my apron, proud of my carefully cut fresh fruits and vegetables.
“Whaddup, bitches?” Maddie barrels into the kitchen, the same opening line as the two days before. She is WILD. She’s not much older than I am, but she’s worked on dozens of sets before and she’s… let’s just say, very comfortable. I adore her.
“Bestie!” I holler back. “Grab me the garnish tray, I need some sprigs on this motherfucker!”
I don’t normally talk like that, and I just sound silly. She gives me a look. I think she can tell I don’t normally talk like that.
Maddie dances over with the garnishes. “M’lady,” she says, offering them to me like a servant and then plucking a loose blueberry off my plate. She pops it into her mouth. “Yum.” She smiles at me and turns to set up her station, and throws together a platter in the time it took me to double check my task list. “Let’s goooo!” she says, whipping her head toward the set.
After we set everything down on the table, I’m ready for my break. “Oh, I’ll come with you!” Maddie says. I want to make a joke about how she just got here, but I don’t want to say anything that sounds like I don’t want her to hang out with me. I step into the alley and sit down on an upside-down milk crate. She stands against the wall and lights up a cigarette.
“Sooo, are you soaking in the glamour of Hollywood?” She points to a stain on my apron, she’s making a joke, but I am so excited that I answer in earnest.
“Oh, my gosh, yes. I still can’t believe I’m here.” I have a big smile on my face. “I’ve actually had a big crush on Hwan Kang since I saw him in Baroque Enigma.”
“He is dreamy, isn't he?”
My face freezes for a few seconds, deciding how open to be. I want to impress her. Should I tell her?
“I actually had a dream about him last night.”
“No! Spill!” She takes a drag. “What kind of dream?” she adds suggestively.
I guessed right, she loves gossip. Score! I have butterflies in my stomach. “A sexy dream.” There's a softness in my voice that betrays my inexperience in discussing this kind of thing.
She did a “continue” gesture with her hand and says, “And? We’ve got ten more minutes, I want to her every last disgusting detail.”
Oh, geez! My face is turning red. “It wasn't that crazy, I guess. Just, like, we were on that part of the set with the red velvet couch–”
“That is a very sexy couch.”
“Agreed!” Her encouragement is building up my confidence. “So, we were at the red velvet couch and it was, well, it was like a movie. I was wearing a really pretty off white satin dress almost like a nightie, and he was just in boxer briefs.”
“Did he have a big bulge?”
I blush again. “I don't remember.”
“Okay, okay, so then what?”
“He pulled the straps of the dress off my shoulders and kissed my neck and my collarbone and let the dress fall to the ground, and then–” Can I even say it? I guess I have to, right? “And then he laid me down on the red couch, put one of my legs over the back of it, and we had sex.”
“Ooooh! I knew you were a little freak. I could see it in your eyes.” I’m tense. I’ve got her on my side and I don’t want to mess up, so I just sit still for a bit. “I actually worked on that set.”
I light on fire! “No! Seriously? Shut up! Really?” I’m overcome! My anxiety leaves and I feel the intensity of curiosity. “I’m— oh my god. That’s so cool. Did you ever talk to him?”
“Yeah! We were actually kind of chill, we would talk about bands sometimes. He’d bum me cigarettes.”
“Shit, that’s so cool,” I sigh.
“There you go. That’s a proper swear."
