Chapter 1 - Ilyana
Ilyana flinched as she turned the corner and saw him. The look in his eyes and her own clenched fists told her it was going to be bad. Every part of her wanted to run. To turn back down the corridor and make her way through the castle until she reached other people.
But she refused to let him think she was afraid of him. She was. But if he knew, it would only get worse. And he had already seen her.
“Looks like the rats are out and about.” Caleb’s voice was full of scorn.
The two men with him instantly snapped their heads in her direction. Caleb and his cronies. The three men were tall and richly dressed.
He was four years older than her, and her cousin had never let her forget who was in charge. Not that age or relations mattered. Caleb was a prince. And he bowed to no one.
Ilyana released her breath slowly. Why were they here? What could Caleb possibly be doing in the library? Cursing herself for taking the shortcut, she tried not to press herself into the wall as she walked toward them.
A few steps away, she stopped and curtsied. “Caleb.” Maybe if she was polite, he would let her pass. One of his friends stepped closer to her. “That’s Your Highness to you, rat.”
Ilyana swallowed. She gritted her teeth.
Caleb raised an eyebrow, and the simple gesture spoke volumes.
Ilyana inhaled. “Your Highness.” She spitted out the words he wanted to hear and lowered her eyes so they wouldn’t see the fire.
Ilyana had never been as demure as her position seemed to demand, and after an argument with her governess, she was not in a good mood today.
“I don’t think she means it,” the other friend said and crossed his arms.
Ilyana glared at him from under her brows. His name was Wenn, and he was only at the castle because his mother was mistress to the king. His father was a noble who had been sent to Doriande, the mountain kingdom, on some diplomatic mission. Probably in the hopes he would die to the blossoms in the icefield.
Caleb took a step forward. “Did you mean it, rat?”
The heat that rose all the way from her feet told Ilyana she was about to be in big trouble. But it was impossible to stop.
“Is that any way to speak to your cousin?” she asked.
Caleb narrowed his eyes and came closer. Ilyana took an involuntary step back, but there was a solid stone wall stopping her from putting any distance between them.
Caleb leaned in close, and she held her breath. With his hands on the wall behind her, she was trapped. She could smell his soap as his words rumbled in her ear. In a voice low enough to keep his cronies from overhearing, he spoke.
“You think I would ever admit to being related to you? You’re lower than the filthiest human. As much as you go around pretending to be one of us, we both know that those ears should be rounded. You’re only here for one reason.”
Ilyana’s lungs burned, and she released her breath. Tears threatened to fall as she blinked, and she steeled herself for what was coming.
“You’re only here until my father is done with you. And as soon as he is, I will very much enjoy finding your limits. Until then...”
Ilyana closed her eyes as he stepped back. She settled her face to show no emotion and prayed to any god that deigned to listen to her.
Strong arms gripped her wrists and pinned them to the wall. To her right, Wenn chuckled as he waited and squeezed her wrist hard enough to bruise.
“Open your eyes, lady Ilyana.” The title was mocking her and the words chilled her to the bone. This was going to be bad.
He was looking at his clenched fist when she forced herself to take in the scene. Caleb stood in front of her, waiting, savoring the moment. Two guards had appeared a few steps away. But she would get no help from them.
His eyes ran over her. She knew it was coming, and yet there was no way she could ever be prepared. There never was.
His fist connected with her ribs, and her lungs rebelled. She didn’t scream. The hands pinning her to the wall were hard and cruel. They prevented her from collapsing in on herself.
The second punch connected with her gut, and she was grateful for the men keeping her upright.
Gasping for air, she focused on the tight jaw of one of the guards. She knew him. He would stay and help her when it was over. But he wouldn’t interfere.
The punches kept coming, spreading fire throughout her body. She took breaths when she could. And waited.
He never hit her face. Not anymore. Not since he had given her a black eye right before a dinner she had to attend. The king had been furious. He had told her she embarrassed him in front of his guests.
She had been young. It was right after she had come to the castle, and she had told him Caleb did it.
Her honesty got her a stinging slap across the face and a stern lecture, never to speak such things of the royal prince again. She had been knocked over by that slap, and from her position on the floor, she had decided that there was no one here that could help her. Save her.
But Caleb had never hit her face again. And she was grateful for that. The rest of the bruises were easy to hide.
She had fought back. Of course she had. But it soon became apparent that it was pointless. So she waited. She tried to find that calm place inside her, the origin of her magic, and she waited. Pain seared her body as a blow landed on her breast.
“Are you sure you don’t want to scream?” His voice was too calm. Too teasing.
Ilyana met his eyes. She inhaled painfully. “You’re going to have to hit harder for that.”
His smirk filled her vision. There was no change in the air, no sparks or lights. But she knew he was tapping into his power. His face told the story as magic filled him and gave him more strength.
The sound was the worst part. The snap that echoed through her body. Sometimes, if the pain was bad enough, she would pass out. She liked passing out. But the sound wouldn’t leave her. The crack of her rib breaking would haunt her dreams and send shivers down her spine.
Darkness came for her and she could hear words far away. Her arms were released, and she fell to the floor in a heap.
Turning slightly to not put pressure on the injuries, and whimpered at the movement. She carefully touched her rib. Definitely broken.
“Lady Ilyana, can I move you?” The voice was concerned as the guard bent down next to her. He was a stout man in his thirties. One of the few people Ilyana knew would look out for her. Soren Fade was the kind of guard that wanted to do good, but had ended up in a bad situation.
Again, Ilyana fingered her side. Once, a broken rib had punctured her lung. That time, she had spent hours lying on the floor, passing in and out of consciousness.
Fade had tried to move her then, too. He had found her a while after the beating. When he lifted her, she screamed. It had taken her a week to heal.
“Careful,” Ilyana said. Fade put his arms under her knees and back and slowly lifted her up. The other guard, a recent addition to the royal household, kept an eye out as they made their way to her room.
She took shallow breaths and weighed the pain of each step against the humiliation of the nobles seeing her lying on the floor, writhing in pain. She clenched her teeth and let her breathing take her away as she called on that small part inside her that always made her better.
Back in her room, she gestured for Fade to put her down. He placed her on the bed, as gently as if she would break from the smallest movement. As if she was a child.
“Should I send the healers?”
He always asked. “I’ll be fine.” Her breaths were already coming easier.
Fade nodded and turned to leave the room. In the door, the new guard was staring at her.
“We should get the healers, right?” the new guard whispered.
“No,” Fade said.
“But she’s hurt. I’ve never seen anyone...”
“There are some things you’re going to have to learn to not see while you’re here.” The door closed behind them, and Ilyana sighed in relief.
She lay still, wondering if there was something she could have done differently. Perhaps if she hadn’t been so upset with the governess, she wouldn’t have gone to that part of the castle. But there was no use wondering.
A slightly deeper breath made her wince at the pain. This was going to take a while.
She must have dozed off, because voices outside her door woke her up. Fade. He was still out there, and he was talking to someone. A woman. Ilyana groaned as there was a knock.
Without waiting for a reply, the door swung open and a plain woman in a simple black dress with her dark red hair pulled back into a knot came in. She was pretty, not stunning, not someone who turned heads, but she had a demure beauty Ilyana envied.
Ilyana was all wisps of untamed golden hair and lips that men stared at. There was nothing demure about her, no matter how hard she tried. Not like the woman in front of her.
Naturally, Genevere Mirawen was fae. Everything about her screamed good ancestry, from her delicate hands to her posture. And she had been tasked with teaching Ilyana all the things the niece of the king would need to know.
“I’m not coming back,” Ilyana said as Genevere closed the door behind her and clasped her hands.
“You cannot run out on our lessons. The king expects you to learn.”
She wanted to say that the king could go to any hell he wanted, but she didn’t. The cool voice of the governess droned on, but she came no closer and did not raise her voice.
That was another thing that irritated Ilyana about her. She never showed any sort of emotion. Her calm exterior never faulted, no matter how childish Ilyana acted. With a slight cringe, she recognized she had acted childishly.
She shuffled slightly higher on the bed and realized Genevere had stopped talking. She was looking at her expectantly.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have left.”
A court nod was all the reply the governess gave. “Guard Fade tells me you are indisposed for the rest of the day.” She reached into a pocket and pulled out some folded papers. “We will continue tomorrow.” She crossed the room and placed the papers on the small desk by the window. “I expect you to have memorized this list by then.”
Without another word, she left the room as serenely as she had entered.
Ilyana sighed. She deserved that. This had been a bad day from the very beginning, and it wasn’t even afternoon yet.
After a few hours of sleep, Ilyana woke up to a body that ached but was no longer in pain. She grazed her rib. There was nothing more than a dull soreness.
She wished she had never gotten the gifts. They had brought her nothing but heartache and suffering. But she had them.
After rinsing her face and changing her dress, trying not to look at the bruises in the mirror, she grabbed her cloak and left the room.
Fade was nowhere to be seen. She hadn’t expected him to still be there. He was not her guard, and he had duties of his own. Not to mention a family.
It was late afternoon by the time Ilyana left the castle behind. More than once, she had stepped out into the city and wished she could just keep walking. Remove herself from all the pain and humiliation. But some things were stronger than her feelings of discomfort.
She parted with a few coins at a street vendor and scarfed down two small meat pies as she walked. Healing made her hungry. She strolled among the vendors who were closing up for the day. As soon as the pies were gone, she spotted a stall selling roasted honey nuts. Another coin traded hands, and she ate the nuts by the fistful.
But this was not why she had left the castle and she walked on, away from the market and down a narrow alley. She was still in a respectable part of town, but not one frequented by nobles. Here, there were mostly humans going about their business. With a few exceptions.
She was one of those exceptions, and she kept the hood of her cloak up to hide the pointed ears. Out here, nobody cared about her fae heritage. Some even hated her for it.
She found the large, two-story building with the bright red door and entered it without hesitation.
Inside, the smell of burning incense choked the air. The lighting was dim, and the windows covered in curtains. She barely glanced around the room. She had seen it many times before with the salacious wall-hangings and soft sofas.
“Good evening, lady Ilyana,” purred a woman in a fabric so sheer it hid nothing at all.
“Cora.” Removing her coat, Ilyana nodded at her. “Do you know?”
“I think he’s free. I can check with madam.” Cora swayed her hips as she crossed the room to a curtained doorway. She spoke to the woman inside, and Ilyana studied the two men in the room. One sat with his legs wide and his arms slung across the back of a sofa. He smiled at the woman approaching. The other, a young man, was blushing and keeping his eyes on the floor.
Cora returned and took her coat. “You can go right up. Anything else today?” Ilyana shook her head and smiled. They always asked, and she always declined. Sometimes she thought she saw disappointment in Cora’s eyes, but she was pretty sure she imagined it.
Upstairs, the lighting was just as dim and Ilyana ignored the moans that reached her from behind the closed doors. She gave a quick knock on the last door to the right and waited. There was some shuffling inside.
The man in front of her beamed as he saw her. “Ana, I wasn’t expecting you.”
“Do you ever?”
He laughed, and the sound of his voice put Ilyana at ease. “I guess not. You know we could have a standing appointment. I always worry that you’ll drop by and I’ll be occupied.”
Ilyana shrugged as she entered the room, which was mostly occupied by a large bed. “Sometimes you are.”
“And you go away unsatisfied?”
It was Ilyana’s time to smirk. “You’ve taught me to deal with that.”
He laughed and closed the door. Ilyana turned to face him. His eyes studied her.
“How bad is it?”
Again, she shrugged. “It’s... what it is.”
Vaino Gilven reached down and grabbed the hem of his shirt. Without further ado, he pulled it over his head and revealed a toned, hairless upper body. “Let me see.”
Ilyana pulled her hair aside and turned her back to him. He quickly undid her dress and let his fingers gently stroke it over her shoulders. She leaned her head forward as his mouth landed on her neck.
“Don’t worry, Ana. I’ll take away all the pain.” His lips touched the skin on her neck and he kissed his way to the point just under her ear. She moaned and let herself sink into the pleasure.
“You know, madam just got a new man.” The words tickled her skin.
“Oh? Is he pretty?”
“Oh, he’s pretty, just what you ladies like. Maybe you should try him out?”
“Maybe.” She raised her hand and let her fingers slip into his hair. He did this, encouraged her to try out the others at the brothel. But she had become comfortable with Vaino. He was the one who made her feel better. And he knew about the bruises on her body.
His firm hands spun her around, and she sighed as his mouth traced down her neck and to the top of her breast. He gently tugged at the dress and she let her arms fall down to the sides. With a few quick movements, she was standing naked in front of him.
His eyes narrowed as he took in the bruises on her breasts, her abdomen, and her hips. “Lie down.” She obeyed and waited while he retrieved a jar. He kept the jar for her. She didn’t bother telling him it did little good for her. She enjoyed his hands, stroking her bruises as he applied the salve. As he kissed them. When all she had to do was accept the pleasure he gave her.
His mouth moved down her body until she gripped his hair and pushed him where she wanted his tongue. He skillfully eased her tension and brought her to the brink of ecstasy.
Ilyana let the skilled movements wash away the pain. When the wave flooded her senses, her muscles tensed, and she moaned.
Falling back on the pillows, she panted heavily and enjoyed the heavy drowsiness that took over.
“More?” Vaino’s hands were traveling up her sides, ready to do her bidding.
Ilyana smiled. “Not tonight.” She placed an arm over her eyes and allowed herself to be vulnerable for a moment. Vaino lay next to her.
“I could help you.”
Ilyana smiled and patted his arm.
“Whoever is doing this to you, they need to be stopped. It’s been going on for years, and it’s not getting better.”
“There’s nothing you can do.”
“I could get you away from here.”
Ilyana lowered her arm and met his eager eyes. “You know I can’t leave.”
He sighed. “I know.”
“How’s your boyfriend?”
The instant she changed the topic, a smile spread across Vaino’s face. “He’s fantastic.”
“And he still doesn’t mind?”
“No, he knows this is what I do. What I’m good at. Besides, everything I learn, I take home to him.”
Ilyana shook her head. Vaino had mentioned his boyfriend a few times, and it still baffled her that he wasn’t in the least possessive of Vaino’s body.
Then again, what Vaino did here was his passion. He always said he had been put here to pleasure others, and he took his calling seriously.
Ilyana sighed and got up, looking around for her dress. Vaino helped with the ties in the back. “I’m so glad you found him.” And she was.
For a brief moment, at the start of their arrangement, Ilyana had a small crush on Vaino. Who wouldn’t? He was handsome, kind, and he knew how to use his body to make her see stars.
But their relationship had matured to a friendship that served them both. She got a reprieve from her life at the castle, and he got not only to fulfill his calling, but a good amount of money.
They never spoke of the money. It felt wrong. Ilyana left the coins on his dresser. And if there was a price change, Cora would let her know.
Counting out the price for a moment’s peace, Ilyana smiled over her shoulder. “I’ll see you when I see you.”
“I’ll be here.”
She sauntered down the dim corridor when voices reached her from the stairs. At first, she thought nothing of it. This was a place of business and men came and went all the time.
But the laugh that bellowed up to her froze her in her tracks. She knew that laugh. She had heard it while Caleb broke her rib.
Cursing to herself, she looked around. Moans and giggles leached through the doors to either side. One of the rooms had to be empty. Cora was working the lobby. She must still be downstairs.
The couple on the stairs came closer. She didn’t have a choice. If Wenn found her here, she would never live it down. And then she would have to give it up. And she wasn’t ready for that.
She reached Cora’s door and tried the handle. It opened, and she slunk inside quietly, praying the room would be empty.
As the tall man reached the corridor, she shut the door behind herself.
“I thought I made myself clear,” a deep voice rumbled from the other side of the bed.
Ilyana gasped and turned to face the man in the room.
