Chapter 1
I glance outside the window, with glazing eyes as my mind, is deeply absorbed in my gloomy thoughts.
-”Zafira, you know how much I like you, my dear girl. But…you have signed a contract for three books with our company. If you can’t make due.. There will be legal consequences and there’s nothing I can do about it. I don’t own the publishing firm”.
Mr Adam’s words still echo in my head, as his kind voice, was clouded with sincere concern and apprehension, when he called me on the phone the other day.
My editor….well…not for much longer if I keep up the “good work”, I muse over myself.
I try to turn my focus on the spectacular scenery of the Norwegian landscapes unfolding out the window-pane.
After Mr Adam’s call a couple of days ago, I had to do something! I had to regain my mental clarity and try to retrieve my usually overactive imagination..
This, is my life’s work.
This, is my chance out of waiting tables for a living and into a more decent livelihood.
This, is my chance to reorganize my life, look after my future, finally take better care of both of us…
Fuck!….
The mental curse doesn’t seem to appease my wrecking nerves, overwhelmed by the anxiety attack, I now feel is rolling over my whole body.
In the meantime, as the train oozes through the majestic nature of the surrounding mountains, the green forests were raging with beauty and harmony, as the rays of the midday sun, glided tenderly over the tree tops, sparkling in a wondrous spectacle of heavenly eye-sight.
The natural beauty we were rushing through, managed to mesmerize me out of my tumbling thinking for a few minutes.
I heave a deep sigh and shake my head in annoyance, with my own self-pity.
I’ve decided to take this trip, pushed by my best friend Savannah, who was a darling offering to keep my little brother with her, while I was away.
After I told her all about Mr Adam’s call, she took it upon her shoulders, to convince me to “take a plunge into a scavenger hunt” -her words- of my long lost literary inspiration.
“Take a trip, to a far away place, you’ve never been before!” she exclaimed excitedly, clapping her hands like the kid she still remained.
Which, come to think of it, didn’t narrow my options down much, since I literally haven’t travelled anywhere so far!...
I tried to kindly reject her offer, knowing she should use her Christmas leave from work, in order to rest and catch up on her much neglected sleep, from her long working hours at the hospital.
I didn’t want her to undertake the task of taking care of a little boy like Bran, especially on her leave.
But, Savannah, being the stubborn bitch I’ve always known her to be, since elementary school, wouldn’t hear any of my objections.
She practically lured my brother, with her famous Christmas cookies- courtesy of her granny’s recipe- and alluring consumption of candy canes and hot chocolate, shamelessly bribing the kid before my very eyes, to spending “a blast of holidays” together.
Again, her words...
God, I love that girl!
I feel my face sweeten with a smile, at the thought of my lively, perky friend.
So….here I am…on my “scavenger hunt”…
Having left my humble apartment in Buffalo NY, my little brother of age 7 and the most precious friend in all creation, to cross the endless miles of ocean, to the Scandinavian peninsula.
Heading to the Nordic Fjords.
A majestic place, full of remnants of the Viking era, the pirates of the North, in a desperate hope to finally catch up with my overdue work..
And that, one mean sun of a writer’s block.
Yeah…right.
Do I actually believe it’ll work?
Nah…not really.
Did I have a choice?
Doubtful.
One thing I do know for sure?
I’m not letting this trivial hiccup, push away my dreams and aspirations of a better future.
Can’t shake off the dread of a failure, though..
The terror, that rams my core, as it washes over me like waves, that batter the rocky cliffs of the shore..
Has the temperature risen in here?
I suddenly, find it a little hard to breathe.
Shit..
I hurriedly stand myself up from my seat, apologizing to the passengers I almost trip on, in my emergency to reach the corridor and finally, dash myself to the tiny restroom of the wagon.
After securing my privacy, I lean over the shiny inox sink, turn the tap on and start rinsing cold water over my now sweaty face.
I take deep, calming breaths, as I forcibly push all the negative thoughts out of my brain, and slowly open my eyes.
My reflection hits me back, revealing the faint glitter of the panic attack, in my sparkling sapphire eyes.
The image of my mom, talking about the very first time her and my dad laid their eyes on me, as soon as they held me in their arms, rushes before my mental eyesight...
“Sapphire gemstones” muttered my dad, according to mom’s saying and it was unanimously decided then and there…
They would name me Zafira.
I guess, I had to blame someone for my overactive imagination..
I sighed a slow inhale again, looking closely for the receding trails of the imminent meltdown.
I was relieved to see my eyes settle down a little, their vivid, almost electric blue color, showing evidence of the now calming turmoil in my soul.
I press my cool palm on my forehead, shutting my eyelids, never releasing the effort of controlling myself.
I open my eyes looking in the mirror.
I sort my cute, pixie blondish hair, which was in a God sent short cut, since it required little to absolutely no effort to fix, even when I wake up in the morning, practically straight out of my sleep!
My heart shaped face, with the clear, pale skin I inherited from my mom, along with her delicate characteristics, is now looking a lot less like a wild animal, trapped in a cage.
Well, that was a close call.
I curtly nod in approval of my reformed appearance, take a final deep breath and I unlock the door to exit to the corridor.
Crisis averted. For now..
I need coffee! ASAP!
I slightly wobble towards the restaurant compartment of the train, only to find it almost empty from fellow passengers. Which is exactly how I prefer it.
No need to add salt to the wound…
An overcrowded restaurant, could potentially work wonders, on my still freshly averted panic attack!
Ugh!….
I take my black coffee from the cute guy at the bar and scoot myself in one of the empty window tables.
Ahh…!. Silence and coffee..
Pure bliss.
Irresistible combination for my nervous system.
I allow the rich flavour of the blend, enrich my taste buds as I keep the sip in my mouth momentarily, relishing the aroma of the espresso.
My gaze, caresses the landscape outside, noticing the sun is on its way down now, toward the sunset.
I take a look at my watch. It’s still a couple of hours before we reach the final station, where, hopefully, there won’t be many passengers off, either.
I allow my head to completely clear out all thoughts and I close my eyes as I slowly sip my rich brew.
My mind flies to my little brother…my little monkey.
I have to make this work. I just have to!
And just like that, my so hard acquired calmness of the previous minutes, flies right out the window and over the tree tops…
My heart starts racing in my chest and my hand now is slightly unsteady, as I raise the cup to my lips for another sip.
Oh, for Heaven’s sake! I huff, fed up with my pathetic, weakling self and almost spring up from my seat.
Fuck this!..
I forcefully swivel my body towards my compartment, feeling my system entering panic mode again, when I’m crashed on a hard surface, blocking my way.
What the hell??
Hardly do I have time to register anything that transpires, before I feel my skin explode with searing pain, as the brown hot liquid, is spreading a huge stain right on my chest, the high temperature, painfully penetrating my thin T-shirt.
A squeal escapes my lips and I instinctively bounce back and away from the source of the sizzling sensation.
My fogged brain hears a male voice attempting to calm me down, while at the same time, I feel hands reaching out to me.
The dude, has expertly pulled on my T-shirt, tugging it away and removing the burning source from my already scorched skin.
-”I’m so sorry ma’am! Ease down, let me help. I’m a doctor” I hear him utter rapidly and with concern.
In the endless daze and turmoil I’ve been having today, this, has to be the topping!
Feeling somewhat relieved that the soaked garment is now away from my chest, I glance at the direction of the voice.
I stand still, taken aback by the stature of its owner. I was going to give him a piece of my mind, but I didn’t quite expect to see, what my eyes fell upon.
My brain vaguely registered, that his hand, was still holding firmly the soaked T-shirt, away from my skin.
The guy, is at least 6’5 and I’m not a short woman either, sporting the most impressive blond, shoulder length hair, that were coming down in heavy wavy curls over his body.
Square jawline, strong facial bone structure, straight nose and a pair of the grayest shade of eyes, I have ever laid my own eyes on.
That’s not fair! I think to myself and I see the man before me breaking out to a spontaneous laugh.
Soft and base, rich tones flooded the air, underlined with the warmth of genuine amusement.
Hell, did I say that out loud?! I wonder in shock, only for my suspicion to be verified, by the wide grin covering the dude’s lips, brightening up his whole face.
Ugh…let me burn to a crisp, NOW!
-”Despite the absolutely charming comment, how about we get you out of this burning cloth, huh? We don’t want to damage the skin any further now, do we love?”
I nod in affirmation and kick my stupidass body, back to movement.
-”Um..yes, yes of course, I should change. Although it feels better now, thanks” I stutter hurriedly, sending out a small smile.
I’m now starting to realize, that my wet shirt, is already dropping temperature fast, having already reached a more comfortable level, so I try to pull it gently, from the guy’s helpful grip.
He lets my shirt go, the smile still lingering on his face.
-”Allow me to introduce myself and somehow make it up to you, for trying to set you on fire? Unwillingly of course!” he adds immediately as he turns around and starts pushing me gently to the general direction of my seat area.
“I’m Wren Collins. It’s nice…ugh…to save you from heat injuries” he chuckles in amusement.
I can’t help but join him.
I feel the rich warmth of his demeanor, wafting over me.
-” No, really, it was entirely my fault. My mind is…. I’m absent-minded enough apparently, to go around bumping on people all over” I say and I know my face is flushed.
-”Oh, so you’ve tried this before then?” the humorous glare in his eyes is delightful.
-”Nah…but give it time!” I mumble gruffly, causing another round of genuine laughter on his part.
I find out surprised, that I enjoy hearing him laugh.
By the time they had finally reached her seat, the train was already decelerating to the next station in line. Passengers filled the corridor, on their way to the platform.
Zafira smiled as she noticed, that the man behind her was blocking most of the people’s way out, with his bulky stature.
She watched him smile kindly, as he would politely try to cringe his volume to his best extent, in an effort to allow more space for the exiting passengers.
She found her seat and reached up to the compartment above it, grabbing a hand bag and diving in to get a fresh shirt to change her wet clothes. She too, passed in front of the cringing giant, giving him a playful glance while lightly waving her clean shirt in the air.
-”I’ll go change and be right back.”
As I was passing him by, instead of continuing to pull his body back as he did with the other passengers, I suddenly feel his warm flesh rub against my own body. Having no time to reverse my own momentum of movement, I brushed against his defined pecks.
I shot him an irritated look, only to catch a brazen, predator-like glimpse, returning my glance.
His eyes were slightly squinted and their beautiful grey color, had now assumed the dark shade of a winter, stormy sky.
I shook my head almost violently, as I felt getting entangled in his gaze, which practically, set off every single alarm in my brain.
I have no time for emotional shit, at this point in my life!
I mentally scold myself for the momentary slip of my senses.
What’s wrong with me??
I deliberately let out an annoyed huff, before ripping my eyes off, and turning my head to the direction of the rest room. I could feel his eyes, smouldering my back.
Fucking guy…
I secure the slender door behind me, and peal off my T-shirt. Pulling a paper towel and soaking it under the water, I tried to erase the remnants of the staining liquid on my skin, before I pull the clean shirt on.
I adjusted the rest of my appearance as best as I could, trying to ignore my fucking racing heartbeat.
Asshole..
I don’t need this ruckus in my life and I hold him solely responsible for this commotion in my soul.
Shit.
I peer myself in the mirror one last time, before I left the privacy of the small water closet.
My bright eyes, stared at me almost glowering, mirrors of the sea of threatening emotions, that washed over me.
I stomped mid way, before opening the door.
I started the breathing exercises again, in an effort to calm down, for the second time today.
I didn’t give myself any more time to think, and the minute I felt slightly settling down, I flew the door open and entered the corridor.
I pause in my tracks, taking yet again, another deep breath.
Fuck this shit today!! Ugh…
The train softly nudges back to motion again, leaving the station, as I gather myself one final time, before making my way to my seat.
The isles were so quiet now, to my great satisfaction, seeming to aid my claim on inner peace and tranquillity.
Seriously though..Where has everyone gone all of a sudden?
-”Most of the passengers get off the train Trondheim. Bodo, is the end of the line. The Norwegian Fjords.” Wren stated as if answering my unspoken thoughts.
What is he, psychic?!
I sneer at the sound of his laughter.
Looking at where his voice came from, I’m surprised to see him comfortably tucked in the now empty seat, next to mine.
What the Hell??
My face must have given away my thoughts, as he points to the other side of the row.
-”My seat was right there. Now that the train is almost empty, thought you wouldn’t mind the company..?..” he trails in a hopeful and inquisitive tone at the same time.
I can do nothing, but nod without saying anything. I wait while he moves his feet sideways, allowing me to pass on the way to my seat.
I sit by the window and feel the place around me closing in…His huge stature, seems as if it’s occupying the whole space.
Why the hell is he sited so close?
Absorbed in keeping my distance as much as possible, in the ridiculously narrow seat with him right next to me, I suddenly, pick up a weird sound coming from his direction.
A sniff?!…
I shoot him a suspicious look, which grew exponentially, when I see his seemingly innocent puppy dog eyes he gives me back.
What’s he up to??
Snapping my attention away from him, I quickly glance around the cart. I can locate no sign of a pet, being left behind from a passenger, that could justify the sound that came to my ears.
Could I be mistaken? The sound was quite distinct, though.
I shake my head and my eyes return to Wren, only to see that he has been staring at me, the whole time.
A straight stare, full of a mixture of audacity, soberness, authority.
Weird!..
This, is the first time I travel by train.
I’ve never cared much about public transportation means. Too many people stacking on one another, for my claustrophobic-prone taste.
I’ve never traveled much either. No time…or money for “seeing the world”, as Savannah’s dream has always been.
And this specific venture of mine?
Solely motivated, by my desperate efforts to regain my lost inspiration and make good on my signed contract with the publishing firm.
No way in Hell, can I afford a law suit for breach of contract!..
A breach that, to my greatest dismay, I see heading rapidly my way, if I don’t succeed in jolting my brain back to creativity...e…
