(26) The amazing stuttered Christmas

-"So ugly, it's perfect. So stupid, it's perfect. It's so perfectly stupid, it's ugly. You're all so perfectly stupid and ugly—merry Christmas and happy holidays!"

Call now to order. This label on the box guarantees the historical value of these recordings. They are the most legendary of their kind in Christmas music.

All the tracks were carefully chosen and compiled from ensembles and soloists with the greatest speech impediments and pronunciation failures and recorded at various locations with handicapped orchestras and other disabled musicians.

This year, play guessing the song by its melody by offering yourself the most heartwarmingly authentic holiday innocence you will relish closely with your family and friends. You can enjoy many hours at a time each day, and that way, beyond the holiday season, this anthologic treasury,

"The Amazing Stuttered Christmas."

You will want to learn and listen to the songs over and over again. This five-CD anthologic treasury opens with one of many essential and most popular songs, classics stuttered, sputtered, and hissed six times their original length and longer.

You will immediately hear the wonderful "Les anges dans nos campagnes" with stuttered breaks where you least expect them! A

"Little Town of Bethlehem"

that'll make you cry each time and an incredibly long double male-female choir rendering of

"D'ou viens-tu bergere?"

that you must hear to believe! Also exclusive to this treasury, another ensemble of soloists and choir performs an extremely rare and convincing

"Twelve Days of Christmas."

We feature several versions of

"Minuit Chrétien"

sung as well as possible. Other favourites include

"I Saw Three Ships,"

a delightful

"We Three Kings,"

a superb

"Gesu Bambino,"

and a hilarious

"God Rest You Merry Gentlemen."

Fill your home with the season's spirit with special favourites featured on this treasury you will be happy to own, like "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer,"

"Frosty the Snowman,"

and

"White Christmas," and as a bonus, the epic

"T'was the Night Before Christmas"

and, taken live on location,

"The Little Drummer Boy."

The anthology would be incomplete without the beautiful "Silent Night,"

a very hesitant

"Winter Wonderland,"

a jingling

"Carol of the Bells,"

and many more. If you order now, you'll get to blanket yourself cozily around the tree and fire with more Christmas spirit hits you might not recognize at first, like

"Away in a Manger,"

"Good King Wenceslas,"

and the nearly missed

"Santa Claus Is Coming to Town."

Fall asleep with your family and pets with the never-before-featured

"Ave Maria"

sung from the heart. This Christmas, get our five-CD anthology treasury while supplies last. As a bonus, if you order now, get a free CD of all the rejected selections. Enjoy over and over again silly bloopers, extended repeated takes, and a few selections that were a bit too ugly, like the deaf and blind old nasal sister that might have scared children, and more. It's free if you order now. Call now. Merry Christmas