What is your opinion?
Great tease
"I really enjoyed reading this excerpt. The writer wasted no time in getting this reader's attention. I appreciated the colorful and playful language and apparent depth of each of the characters, especially Irulen. I really enjoyed the mystery aspect, coupled with vibes from fantasy lore. Almost like "Merlin the Detective". This reader will definitely be looking forward to what comes next."
Review
"I am a pretty casual reader and found this excerpt to be entertaining. I thought the writing style and descriptions were intriguing and kept me interested. The story was somewhat dark but the main character came across somewhat light hearted. I would definitely consider reading the entire story."
Riveting
"What a through and through riveting read. From the first sentence to the last, quite engrossing. I thought it was well written. The pace was right, the plot was engaging and the characters well rounded and well established even if it was just an excerpt . I like the subtle lightness to an otherwise dark story."
Well done overall! Ch. 1-2
"Chapter 1 "Perhaps that's why I like the cold so much, It acts like people repellent." Same, actually. I enjoy going outside in the warm, summer. But doing the winter, cold is the perfect excuse to stay indoors and read! So he uses his gift of foresight for his mind to travel ahead, what does he see? Does he just look for the path and then return to the present? I like the idea of him finding jobs through Max, although his name seems more modern compared to Irulen (although I love the name), unless its a name from another country? I really like your descriptions, they're very vivid, but I think describing the wall watcher as "the fatty cylinder" is pushing it a little too far. I don't know, but to me it just seems to be an unnatural description. And then several lines later you describe him as "the little mole man", I think that's a contradictory description? As I was saying, I really love your descriptions. I think that they're very well done and its as if you are right there watching everything happening. The way the story is written reminds me of older fantasy novels I've read and Tamora Pierce's style. Its nice to read a story that makes you think of traditional fantasy and yet something new. I think the setting feels much like a character in itself and gives the story a certain gloomy, suspenseful tone. I like it. I think its an interesting twist to have a wizard that solves mysteries and believes more in the darkness in humans than in the supernatural. It gives the story a refreshing look. Also speaking of Tamora Pierce, Irulen reminds me of her wizard Numair. He's a wizard too and similar in a way in personalities to your character. I also really love Irulen's bond with the raven, Max. I enjoy it because its a twist on the traditional view and symbolize of the raven. Even mentioned in the story, ravens traditionally are seen as harbingers of death and so I think its an interesting way to flip the trope. Here Max, the raven brings the wizard that helps towns and people find closure. The fact that Irulen has such a strong bond with the raven adds something to his character and I think helps him be more 3D. That being said, I think Irulen seems very well developed as a character along with his weakness for beautiful women. I'm also thinking that Irulen and the tavern girl will become romantic interests later on? As for the plot, I think its suspenseful and already even in the first chapter, I want to know who killed Isabel and why. I love mysteries and a wizard who solves them is a delightful concept. The other characters I think are well developed. The village head, the watchman, and the other characters. They all seem pretty realistic. Overall I think this is a great start. And while it isn't super exciting as far of what happens, I think it has an air of suspense and mystery that I enjoy, So well done, I'm excited to read the rest. Chapter 2: I like the description of the old man where Irulen thinks that he can see dust coming out of his mouth. I think that's a good description to show how old he is. I think its an interesting detail to add in the part about Max going to the bathroom. I'm not sure how necessary it is, but its a detail I myself wouldn't have thought to have added. My next question then is what does he do with the rag and does he do that all the time? "The ground's snow..." I think that's an awkward phrasing because it gives the ground possession of the snow, as if it belongs there. Which is an interesting concept in itself, but I do think that it would be better to maybe just say that the snow was littered with brown needles... "Max, deciding to spread his morning wings," <--- Not sure what you mean by morning wings. I love the description of when he walks into the grove, it sounds so beautiful despite the horrible thing that happened there. I think its interesting the way he reacts to the crystal and has another one. It almost seems to be that this event is somehow personal to him, as if it affects him more than other murder scenes. I like the idea of him collecting the footprint using the ink method, but considering how cold it would be, I'm not sure how effective it would actually work. I might imagine that the ink would either freeze really quickly or that the ink would be warmer than the snow and therefore melt it. I'm not sure how well it would transfer. Have you done research on this method or tried it yourself? I like the way you describe people, raging beasts, wriggling worms, etc. Nice descriptions. Just be careful not to overdo it. So this mystery man comes to Angus telling him his daughter's soul is trapped and is constant pain. And then he makes a bargain to keep the town safe. I'm confused on how this is connected. What exactly was Angus trying to keep the town safe from? From this mystery man, from the same thing happening to other people, or something else? The ending is very captivating and dark. I like it. Good suspense. Overall: I think the second chapter does a good job at keeping up the suspense and mystery. As in the first chapter, I think some of the details and descriptions are a little unnecessary or overdone. Other times I think your descriptions are wonderful and very well done. I like the town as a setting and it seems to have its own character. Nicely well done. I remembered what this reminds me of, the retelling of the Red Riding Girl story with Amanda Seyfried from a couple years ago. The town reminds me of that. Also with the similarities between wolves and girls being taken. Of course, two totally different stories altogether, but the similarities make me think of that. I think that the characters are still very well done and are all their own character. No one seems to be particularly flat or cliche, so well done. None of them seem to be Mary Sue or Gary Sues. The plot as I mentioned before is still suspenseful and full of mystery. And it flows well, I wasn't confused with the direction of the chapter at all. Overall this is another great chapter and I look forward to reading the third."
Brilliant Mystery-Fantasy
"With a well thought-out magic system and a mysterious plot, this story had plenty to keep me interested. I was hoping for a bit more of a battle between the bad guy and Irulen, but the story didn't seem anticlimactic without that. I would love to read more of Irulen's adventures."
An Engaging Blend of Fantasy and Mystery Fiction
"I really enjoyed this excerpt. The story is an engaging blend of fantasy and mystery fiction. The author really touches on so many elements of the human condition in such a unique and creative way. Guilt, revenge, regret, redemption, even a touch of romance...it's all there. The characters are intriguing and I'm hoping to learn more about them as the story continues! I love that the hero in the story, Irulen, is so flawed, I found myself yelling at him sometimes and rooting for him at others. Easy read as your other work, I'm keeping an eye on this author!"
Wonderful story!
"This is one of the best stories that I have read on this site so far. Although it was a murder mystery, it was not too dark and had a good ending. The plot was understandable and interesting, and the characters kept me intrigued throughout the whole story. I would certainly read more by this author."
Intriguing Mystery Fantasy
"Being an avid reader of fantasy and science fiction, this book was great for me. So far I have only completed the first two chapters but even so the story merits a review. And I look forward to reading the rest of the book and writing a more thorough review later. Even so, Irulen is an intriguing character along with his raven, Max. From the two chapters alone, there is a hook that guides you into reading more! You can immerse yourself in this world and Will Bly certainly has succeeded in marrying the fantasy and mystery genres. Certainly, he is an author to watch!"
A rewarding, creative “Fantasy Crime Mystery”.
"I am eager to read more of the story and find what is given to be both unique and highly enjoyable. The author presents a dark, savage world that is entreated by no typical protagonist—Irulen, a wizard investigator for hire, whose limited supply of power makes for an interesting dynamic and a plot ripe with potential. Specifically, the first three chapters do well to establish Irulen’s short-term objectives as an investigator, while hinting at the dark nature of the world he lives in. The side characters are paradigms of a savage domain—William Steadfrost and Jorin—are presented as weathered, ferocious men and contrast well with Irulen’s demeanor. Overall, great job on a creative marriage of both fantasy and mystery genres!"
Intriguing delight
"Usually, this isn't the type of story I'd find myself reading, but a new thing I'm trying is to have an open mind to different genres. This story did not disappoint. Although the start is a bit slow, it picks up when the reader learns of the first case taken on by the wizard. Already, the mystery has been introduced and it keeps the reader searching for clues wanting to know more. The imagery was well written. A few contradictions in the description of characters, but overall enjoyable. There were times I felt it was forced or perhaps too much, but other times it was spot on.. The relationship between Irulen and Max is interesting. One with an exotic name and the other with the name of a dog, but he's a raven. I like it. I like the overall relationship. Is it weird I thought of Maleficent and her raven when I read he was a wizard with a raven? lol. Kind of reminds me of that. A huge thing I loved was the suspense in this story. The author did a great job keeping the reader on their toes."
Not My Usual Cuppa
"Y'know the expression "not my cup of tea"? RAVENS IN THE SKY wouldn't normally be a book I'd read, the story being stewed in the dark arts and peopled with characters who are puppeted by evil forces, and yet I read the whole thing. (Of course, only an excerpt is available here.) Bly's writing voice is engaging, the characters are interesting, and I always like a mystery, so I was drawn into the story in spite of myself. That wasn't too difficult. (wink and a smile) Recommended reading."
