1. Aftermath
Henry
I woke up with my mouth dry as sandpaper and a dull throb behind my eyes. The room smelled like sweat, cheap perfume, and whatever was left of the night. I didn’t recognise the ceiling, or the girl breathing softly beside me.
My right nostril felt irritated and sore, like the air itself was too sharp and I try to piece together the events of last night.
“Can you stop moving?” the mysterious girl moans, “Unless you’re ready for round 2?”
I frantically look around and let out a sigh of relief when I see the empty condom packet on the floor. The girl sits up and raises an eyebrow at me.
“The house is free, you can see yourself out.”
“Thank you…. errr…” “Abi.”
“Right… Abi… Well, bye?”
Truthfully, I can’t remember what we did last night, or how I even got here in the first place but I’m glad she isn’t expecting anything more from me.
The house is easy to get out of, but I realise I’m in fucking Croydon off all places, when I was meant to be staying in Mayfair with the guys. I call an Uber and pray it comes quick before I get mugged. Luckily it does, but it’s an older Skoda that’s beat up because that was the quickest one available.
Fan-fucking-tastic.
I enter the Uber without a word to the driver, even when he tries to make conversation with me, and during the drive, I start to reflect on how I got here in the first place.
It’s been over two months since the winter ball, and the memories of the day still give me nightmares. Finding Emma’s body looking so lifeless and with blood dripping down her head is an image I fear will scar me for the rest of my life.
One week she was in a coma for after the surgery to stop the internal bleed. She even had a stroke before getting her into theatres. I stuck around while I waited for her to wake up, despite her mother screaming at me many times to leave.
When she eventually did wake up. I was too much of a coward to see her, so I left and haven’t said a word to her since then. Two weeks after uni restarted, I noticed her sit at the back in the far corner, where she used to sit before she met Shola and I. She’s always wearing a dark hoodie that’s up so I can barely see her face, but it’s not like I look at her long enough to even try.
Shola and I barely speak, not that I can blame her. Everyone found out that we slept together, along with me, she became a public enemy. But instead of being there for her, I was so focused on one thing.
Revenge.
It was my mission to ruin Kayla Matthew’s life. I filed the biggest lawsuit on her that nearly ruined her father’s basketball career. I’ve started so many awful rumours which led to paparazzi never leaving her alone. But I have a little gem that I’m saving for a day she won’t see coming, a video of her sleeping with her stepfather. Shola has begged me to not reveal it but there’s no telling me.
After that day, something in me snapped. It’s like all the good in me that I had built up had left my soul, and I was a crueler version of the person I tried so hard not to be. I spend a lot of my weekends partying, taking all sorts of drugs, and sleeping with anyone with a pulse. Anything to numb the pain I’m feeling from losing Emma.
I’m still in disbelief that Emma nearly died that day. All because of me. I haven’t tried to explain that the text messages were fake, or the photo of Kayla and I kissing in the club were fabricated. I was heartbroken and drunk out of my mind the day it happened, but I remember the encounter perfectly clear.
***Flashback***
Kayla waltzes over to me in the club with the smuggest expression on her face. I'm too wasted to entertain her bullshit so I try to walk past her, but she pushes me against the wall.
"Why the long face?" she purrs and her breath tickles my face, "It's not like it was ever gonna work out?"
She presses her lips against mine, and tries to gain access with her tongue, but I push her off.
"If you touch me ever again, I swear you'll wish you never even stepped foot into England!" I seethe.
"It's not like you're gonna get her back anyway!" she shouts over the music.
"Watch me."
***End of flashback***
Maybe Kayla was right. It was never going to work.
The taxi pulls up outside the penthouse and I try to leave but the door remains locked.
"I'm sorry, because we were in Croydon and-"
"Do your fucking job properly!" I snap before slamming the car door shut.
When I get to the penthouse, I'm shocked to see Malcolm up and waiting for me on the couch.
"Nice of you to stop by," he scoffs, "You look like shit by the way."
"Fuck off," I reply as I grab myself a plate of food from the breakfast buffet. I slump myself on the couch nearby and proceed to shove croissants into my mouth.
"What the fuck's going on with you, man?" Malcolm says, and I raise my eyebrow at him. "Ironic for you, of all people, to give me shit."
"Yeah, well that's me, I'm a useless scumbag. You on the other hand have your shit together. You're a better person than this Hen. This has been going on for too long now, you think Emma would want to see you acting like this?"
I get up from the couch with my food and start walking towards my room, "Don't fucking mention her name again."
I slam my door shut and look down at my food. Out of frustration, I throw the plate against the wall and sink into the bed. I don't know if it's a comedown from all of the drugs, but sadness washes over me as I think back to the time where everything was perfect. Emma and I were still madly in love, my company was doing well, Kayla Matthews didn't fucking exist. I pull out my phone, and find the video of Kayla riding her stepdad. I have it all set out. The burner phone I'll use to expose the video, the fake account. I'm so fucking tempted to finish this once and for all, but I guess my hesitation comes from the last shred of humility I have.
As an attempt to talk myself out of doing it, I decide to FaceTime Shola.
"Nice of you to call, has the constant partying started to bore you?" she asks sarcastically.
I've been the worst friend to her. Emma outed that Shola and I had slept together, and more rumours came out that I was secretly being her behind Emma's back. Shola has been called every name under the sun, and it got so bad that she had to shut down her instagram that she worked so hard for.
"Can we please meet before class tomorrow?" I plead, "I know given everything that it isn't the best idea but... I miss you."
"You miss me?" she scoffs, "I never had you on block and you could have reached out to me all these days. What the fuck was stopping you? My life is fucking over!" she says as her voice cracks, "You were too busy partying, or trying to seek revenge on Kayla and for what? So you can feel better? I needed you, Henry."
My heart breaks as she sobs through the phone, and it pisses me off that I don't know how to comfort her, especially as she had been there for me at my worst.
An idea pops into my head, “How much do you care about missing uni this week?" I ask. "I wanna avoid the whole of Colchester if I'm being honest," she scoffs.
"Pack your bags, we're going to Barcelona for a few nights."
“Holy shit!” Shola gasps as she steps into our private jet. “You own this?”
“We actually own 2,” I correct her, “Although I don’t really see the need for a family of 3.”
“I mean, youre no better for taking a private jet for a 2-hour flight- not that I’m complaining!
When we’re up in the air, I notice Shola from the corner of my eye stare at me, whilst I try to read.
“Can I help you?” I ask.
“Are you okay, Henry?”
I shrug, “I’m as okay as I can be.”
She comes to sit closer to me on the sofa and crosses her legs as she faces me.
“You’ve been off the fucking rails.”
I guess that’s a nice way of putting it. The media have been more than generous in capturing me at my worst moments. I’m shocked my father hasn’t combusted into flames.
“I’ve been trying to take my mind off things,” I reply non-chalantly.
She sighs and scoots closer to me, before resting her head on my shoulder.
“I know how much she meant to you.”
I haven’t cried since the day of the ball about the sitiation, trying to numb my pain with booze and drugs. I swallow my feelings that are threatening to come out, and turn to Shola.
“I’m sorry you lost her too.”
Shrugs but doesn’t reply. Emma was the only girl friend Shola had that she could be herself. She often had an identity crisis when it came to friends. Often being seen as “an oreo” with her black friends and having to tone herself down for her white friends. But Emma saw her for who she really was, and although Shola is angry with her for outing us, she misses her too.
“Have you spoken to her at all? Tried to explain the situation?”
I shake my head, “She’s better off without me Sholls, I nearly killed her.”
“Don’t say that-“
“It’s fucking true!” I shout as my voice breaks. I take a deep breath in to supress my emotions and blink away the tears threatening to fall.
“You loved her, everyone with eyes could see that. It just…. Clearly wasn’t meant to be at this time, but who’s to say never.”
It could have worked. If I hadn’t had slept with Kayla, or told her about when she tried to kiss me at the club. It’s all my doing, so I deserve to feel like a piece of shit for the rest of my life.
“Let’s just enjoy our time in Barcelona,”
“Alcohol free!” Shola scolds, “Ugh don’t be boring!” I reply but truthfully my liver could do with a break.
It feels good to be back in Spain. After the break up, I spent some time in Madrid with my old school friends and I honestly didn’t want to return - probably why I’ve turned to partying back in the UK. It was also really nice to spend time with Shola. As much as love my usual circle, Shola is a really refreshing change of company. Makes me miss the times when Shola, Isaac, Emma and I used to hang out.
"How's Isaac doing?" I ask as we eat paella by the seafront, but her smile fades a bit.
"I think he's a bit put off by the fact we slept together."
"Why the fuck?" I snap, "He didn't fucking know you during that time, and it was in the past. I'm gonna kick his ass!"
"Okay first of all, we both know that is a fight you do not wanna start with him, he would karate chop you in half! And it's not that... It's just he hasn't really touched me since finding out. It's as if he's second guessing himself. And it sucks because we had really good sex."
"I don't wanna know that," I grimace.
"Oh, but it was fine for me to hear you and Emma all night?" she laughs, referencing to the time we had a Forbes 30 under 30 celebration party, and Emma and I were doing our own version of celebrating.
"The point is, I think he's a bit insecure, obviously with you being you, he feels like he can't compete."
"Take it from me, being with someone that's insecure is draining," I add, "It won't work if he doesn't get over himself soon. Just have a conversation with him about it. Reassure him that it was a mistake. You can even tell him it was shit - even though we both know you'd be lying."
Shola kicks me in under the table and I feign injury. After dinner we go for a walk by the seafront as its our last night.
"I really don't wanna go back to uni," Shola sighs.
"Things will be different," I reassure her, "Open up your insta account again, don't let all this crap affect your achievements. And if anyone even dares to chat shit, they'll have me to answer to - and I have a lot of anger right now."
Shola laughs and links my arm, "Are you gonna chill with the partying and sleeping around?" "I promise."
"And the video...?"
I shrug, "I still have it, saving it for a rainy day."
"Henry-"
"She has it coming Shola, you're not changing my mind. That was the happiest I've ever been and she ruined it. So I'm going to ruin her."
Shola sighs in defeat and doesn't mention it again. I can tell she's disappointed in me but I don’t care.
A couple days later, we get back to uni, and Shola is feeling a lot better. She's opened up her instagram account and has resumed posting, and her relationship with Isaac seems to have improved.
"I don't know what it was about him finding out about us, but I swear he was holding back before," she beams as we walk to class. We're a bit earlier than usual because I picked her up for some breakfast. We were gonna find a seat together before everyone came in.
"Again, I don't want to know about your sex life with Isaac," I groan. Isaac is attractive sure, but way too awkward for me to imagine him having sex with my best friend.
"Honestly Henry, it was earth shattering, it was like-" she stops at her tracks when she notices someone, and when I look towards the same direction, I see.
Emma.
She freezes like a dear in headlights when she sees us, and I notice her knees start to tremble.
She's wearing the same dark green hoodie that I've noticed her in before and is wearing joggers. This is the first time I've seen her face since the ball, her cheeks are a lot more hollow and I can see the stitches from when she hit her head. My chest starts to pound and I gulp a large chunk of air to suppress it, but I start to hear my heart beat out of my chest when she makes eye contact with me.
I miss her. I miss her with every fibre in my body. I just want to pull he into my arms and never let her go. But I don't. I just stand there with my dick in my hands, unable to speak or move.
She turns around and starts to walk away quickly, hurrying when Shola tries to stop her.
"Wait Emma!" she shouts as she walks after her, "Can we all just talk please?"
Emma doesn't turn back, and hurries off into another corridor. She takes a deep breath and walks over to me, but her expression turns to concern when she sees my face.
"Hey, you're going to be okay," she reassures me when a panic attack starts to rise.
"I-I just need to get out of here," I stutter as swallow the bile rising up my throat. We rush to my car and she stays with me whilst I sit and calm myself down.
"God, I'm fucking pathetic," I say once my heart has gone back to normal.
"No, you're just human."
