NAYAN : Your Eyes Tell

Nayantara

My life was filled with darkness, since I was born. Not because I have some kind of depressing backstory aligned with my life, but the part of myself, which makes me see the light of the world around me, was snatched from me by fate. Since then, the only thing which supported me in my daily life is the cane I always used to carry around.

Whenever I goes around the neighborhood or some place to relax, I always hear one thing repeatedly. Wow Nayan, Your eyes are so pretty. I don't know how much of this are truth and how much it's a lie. I've never seen my eyes afterall.

I just give them a smile and asked back, "Is it? Really?"

Today as usual I did my morning routine. Even though my eyes don't work, it won't cause much difficulties in my daily life. I have caring parents along with him. Avyukt Singhania, an over caring elder brother. Since childhood he became my eyes. Wherever we go together, I can see the world in his voice.

But now I stop seeing the world with the help of him. Cause, I understand, that my brother has his own life, his own future, his own personal world. I can't always hold onto him, and become a burden in his life. With counseling, and help of family and friends, I started living my life alone.

I learn to read with the help of Braille system, and not only that I even started to write sensing the paper surface and the structure of the pen. At first it was way too hard, so I almost gave up. When I curled up in corner, cursing myself and the God, for making me a miserable loser, my only ever light, my brother sat beside me wiping my lonely tears.

My Nayan has the most beautiful eyes, so what if you can't see with them. You have other eyes too, which will make you see and understand the world, better than these two. So, see the world with your heart, Baby Star. You are and will be always the brightest star of the sky.

This is the last thing he said to me to make me come out from the darkness which consumed me completely. And it didn't take me too much time to actually do that. I conquered my darkness, used my sense rather than vision, and became the brightest star as per my brother's wish. I scored top in my every academic field, and became a secret novel author while working as a librarian professionally.

"Maa, I'm going to work?" I shouted out of my lungs like usual while taking my stuffs and adjusting my bag.

Aradhana Singhania , A loving and caring housewife, my mother, shout back, "First take your breakfast, Beta."

They say, a lady is the boss of a household. I don't know, how much of it is true, but in my house, this rules absolutely, in every way. I know, since it's the lady boss's order, I can't help but have to oblige it.

I sat on my chair like a good little baby. Avyukt came downstairs and ruffled my well set hair,

"My baby star is so hardworking." He giggled making me whine frustratingly. The next moment I heard a 'Bam' sound along with his painful whimper.

"If you bully my daughter once again, I will disown you", I heard the familiar voice which was my most favourite.

"Baba" I made my most pitiful face which was the greatest weapon I have against him. Nachiket Singhania, a typical daughter slave father, who's also my superhero since childhood, pulled my brothers ear making him whine. I can't see their cute banters but it always makes me giggle hearing them. The next moment, I felt a pair of rough hands on my head, combing my hair. I knew this hands better than anyone. Baba (father) loves to comb my hair as far as I remember.

I had an accident when I was 10 years old, which made me forget 5 years of my previous memories. I didn't even remember how did I get into the accident. But since then, my family get overprotective about me, especially my father. It was actually a mother's job, to doll up a daughter, but my father snatched it from my mother. Maa (mother) and Bhaiya (brother) told me that he was like that since Maa was pregnant with me. He filled a whole closet with girls dresses along with baby shoes. He had the confidence that he's gonna have a daughter.

And after my birth, whenever Maa wanted to doll myself, my Baba rejected the idea. You go make your son doll up as princess. My princess is mine to adorn. That's what he used to say to her, as much as I've heard.

My Baba made a beautiful braid out of my hair, while Bhaiya fed me. If there's someone else in my place, they might feel pathetic of themselves. They might felt miserable for their disability, and for being a burden. But I don't feel like that. Cause I know, my Baba and Bhaiya loves me most in the world. And the way they take care of me, is not just out of obligation or pity, but because they love me. I'm not a burden to them, but the most precious existence which they are unwilling to lose. Even Maa gets jealous seeing both her husband and son worshiping her daughter.

"Wow, early in the morning, the princess service has begun", See, even now her voice is laced with jealousy. Though I can tell, it's not for long. Out of three of them, she's the most possessive about me after all.

"Baba, your Biwi (wife) is getting jealous again", I made a fake complaining pout.

"Don't mind this old woman, princess. She is not as beautiful as you, that's why." Baba said, setting my previous messy hair perfectly, which made me giggle.

"Baba said right, Maa, can you stop being jealous of my baby star", Bhaiya chimed in teasing Maa. I can feel the heat coming from my mother. She can burst in any time. I feel the mission of saving both my idiot father and brother. They don't know with whom they are messing with. So I made a cute pout, and spread my hand to touch her.

"Maa..." I call her, which made her soften herself. She held my hand and kissed my forehead.

"Well I agree with them. No one is more beautiful than my daughter." Maa said, caressing my hair which made me smile. At that moment my smartwatch started ringing the alarm breaking our family moment.

"Oh no... I'm gonna get late. I'll miss my bus" I hurriedly stood up.

Baba and Bahiya hurriedly gave me my bag, bottle. Maa put the tiffin box inside my bag and hand me my cane. I kissed her cheek and bid them goodbye.

I walked through the road with the help of my cane. The neighbors in my neighborhood are all so friendly. They all greeted me with smile. I also greeted them back with a subtle nod. The road to my workplace is all familiar to me. I just need to go to the bus stop, and take a bus to the library, where I work.

Everyone knows about my disability, so no one do rash driving on the neighborhood street. I walked straight like everyday, with the help of my cane, and was about to reach at the bus stop. When I suddenly heard a cycle rushing at me.

"Didi (Sister), step aside, my cycle brake is not working." I heard a boy's scream following with a cycle ring. This never happened to me, so I don't know what should I do. I freezed on my track, dumbfounded to decide which side should I step, since I don't know from which side he was directing the cycle. I clenched my eyes in fear.

When I was almost about to get hit by the cycle, a firm hand pulled me to the side. My cane and bag fell from my hands due to the strong pull. The boy who was riding the cycle ride past me as I found myself in strong, sturdy arms.

"HEY, ARE YOU BLIND? CAN'T YOU SEE THE CYCLE RUSHING TOWARDS YOU. YOU WANT TO DIE THAT BADLY?" A deep, manly, loud voice rang over my head. I flinched at the loud voice. No one ever talked to me in loud voice, since childhood. The men in my house and also in the neighborhood, used to talk gently and softly at me. But this man's loud voice triggered a fear inside me, like I have heard this type of harsh tone before too, even though, I still can't remember. My whole body started trembling as my blood became cold.

Maybe the man noticed my trembling too, so he let out a sigh of frustration and slowly removed his arm from my arms.

"You've grown up so much, can't you stop acting like a child. Even though it's a narrow road, but who the hell walk through the middle of the road." His voice is gentle now. He keep nagging, without letting me talk, which made me so much angry. I was about to argue back with him, when the boy who rode the cycle, came back running to me. Somehow, he managed to stop his cycle, at last.

"Nayan Didi. Are you okay? Did you get hurt?" The boy said with worry laced voice holding my dress. I recognized this voice. It's Arush, he lives next door. I fumbled my hands to touch his face.

"Aru... How many times do I need to tell you, not to ride cycle in high speed. Today, your brake was not working, what if someday you got in a worse accident. You might lose your legs forever." I scolded him gently, yet strictly. Arush might have also felt guilty. I feel him lowering his head.

"I'm sorry, Nayan Di. I was just having fun since the road was empty. I won't do that again." Arush said with a guilty, repentant voice.

I spread my palm, "Promise?"

Arush placed his hand on my hand and said determinedly, "Promise."

I smiled at him even though I am not looking at him directly. He ran to the road and came back with my cane and bag. "Didi here's your cane and bag. The tiffin box fell out from the bag. I checked it. It wasn't broken and the lid is tightly closed, so your lunch is safe."

I took the things from his hand and pat his face, "You be safe too. And no more high speed riding, okay?"

I told him strictly, he nod his head and ran away. I felt a pair of eyes prying onto our conversation like a hawk. I know, he's the man who scolded me unjustly. I should thank him, for saving me from getting heavily injured, but I'm too angry to do that. So I made a grumpy pout and turn to the opposite side ignoring him, walking towards the bus stop. I guess, I heard a faint chuckle, as I started walking.