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Letters to God: God First

All Rights Reserved ©

Summary

A series of journal entries about the journey I've been on with God and the struggles that I face every day with being faithful to my calling.

Genre
Other
Author
AJ_Black
Status
Ongoing
Chapters
33
Rating
n/a
Age Rating
13+

Bitter Ashes

Her dreams had turned to bitter ashes in her mouth, and years of pain and loss had numbed her heart.

Disappointment was no stranger in the house of her soul, and failure often visited like an old friend.

She fought against the odds until she gave up, and—dead inside—still walked among the living.

Hours, days, and years lost their meaning. She was ready to die and be done with it all, yet something stopped her from taking that final step over the edge.

She believed herself strong for surviving so much. Invulnerability became the armor she wore, and she built a towering wall around her heart.

Nothing could hurt her or reach her anymore, or so she believed. Then life ripped through the walls around her castle and tore away the armor like a monstrous beast.

Unable to face the storm without protection, she fell to her knees and bowed her head. All the emotions she had pushed away for so long rushed through her like a flood through a canyon.

Tears leaked from her eyes and dripped onto the ground. She thought herself defeated, broken, and beyond help, but a greater power than herself surged from the ashes of her despair.

It cried for her, it pleaded for her, it implored on her behalfand she surrendered herself.

Calm descended upon her as the pieces of her broken life took on an entirely new shape.

She sobbed quietly as the pain eased away, the bitterness dissolved, and the angry storm quieted.

The great empty void in her chest was empty no more, and a phrase loosened itself from her tangled memories of the past:

“Be still, My child, and know that I am your God.”

The world had not changed, but she had. She had come alive again, reborn from what was.

“Thank you,” she whispered, knowing the storms would never overtake her again, because Hope lived inside her.

Sometimes we get to a point in life where everything becomes too much.

The day I got to my breaking point was the day that saved my life: 23-02-2020.

There have been many storms and dark days since, but this time I know I’m not alone.

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