Chapter 1
"See, isn't he handsome?" My mother asked me while showing me a picture of a man.
"But I don't want to get married; Maa, I don't even know him." I replied, and she started sobbing.
"After your father died, I took care of you, Samiksha. How could you not trust my choice? If I chose him for you, then I must have seen something in him."She was crying.
"Maa, please don't cry." I said it pleadingly because I couldn't see her like this.
After all, she raised me when my biological mother died and took care of me after my father's death.
Hesitantly, I agreed, "Okay, Maa, I trust you."
"Oh my God, that's great news. Come, let's go shopping; we don't have much time. It's just a day, and we had so many things to do." She said it happily.
"A day?" I asked, confused.
"Yes. Your would-be husband wants this as soon as possible." She replied smilingly, and I cringed over the word husband.
We did all the shopping, and the next day came in the blink of an eye. Now I'm all ready in a mehroon-colored lehnga and tons of heavy jewelry, waiting for Barat (the groom and his family). I'm so nervous.
How could I agree to all this? I mean, a wedding in a day? But Maa says Rajbeer wants it low-key and fast, so here I'm.
Well, Rajbeer Singh is his name.
Then my maa came to take me for mandap. There is a heavy ghoonghat (kind of a veil) on my face, and I'm not able to see anything.
Then Pandat Ji (the priest) enchanted mantras, and after Faira's (seven rounds around the holy fire), he put Sindoor (Vermillion) in the partition of my head and put Mangalsutra (nuptial chain) around my neck. I'm married and didn't even see his face.
After Bidaii (farewell ) , I left for my new house with my husband. The veil is still on, and I'm so tired of this heavy attire that I slept.
I didn't know when I was sleeping, but when I opened my eyes, I was in a luxurious bedroom and laying on a first-night-decorated bed.
Then I remembered that I'm married and it's my new room.
I'm getting up from my laying position when the door opens, and I hear footsteps approaching me. I instantly covered my face because Maa told me that only my husband would take it off on my first night.
Oh god, thinking about this gives me chills, and I waited. He approached me near my bed and sat in front of me. Slowly, he took off my veil, and I closed my eyes in nervousness and out of shyness.
He held my chin and made me look at him. "Open your eyes," came a demanding voice, and I obeyed.
I slowly opened my eyes, and after seeing who was sitting in front of me, I screamed in shock. He is nothing like what I saw in the pictures. In fact, he is older than me.
"Who are you?" I asked, sinking back.
"Is this a joke? I'm your husband." He said it in a little pissed-out tone.
"No, you are not him. HELP!!!!" I screamed for help. "Rajbeer? Where are you? Help me."
"I'm Rajbeer. Your husband." He said.
"No," I said in disbelief. "The pictures weren't yours?"
"Oh, that must be your mother's deed. So you don't deny marrying me." He said it, chuckling. "But it doesn't matter. I'm your husband." He said he was getting close to me.
What? Maa would never do such a thing to me.
"No." I said that, pushed him back, and jumped from bed. But he held me by my waist and threw me on the bed.
"Please don't; it must be a misunderstanding." I pleaded.
"Misunderstanding?" He laughed. "No, it's not. You are my wife."
"No. You are lying. Where is Rajbeer? RAJBEER? RAJBEER? Where can you help me? Help your wife." I said it while crying.
"Enough!!!!!" He roared, and I'm stiff at my place.
"Please." I pleaded with my joined hands.
"Let me go. Let me go to my maa. She will tell you it must be a misunderstanding." I said meekly, and tears started rolling from my eyes.
"Your Maa knows everything, and she agreed to this." His words shocked me.
"NO, NO, NO, YOU ARE LYING." I screamed at the top of my lungs.
Then he landed a harsh slap on my face, and I'm stunned.
"Enough of your nonsense. Don't you understand? I'm your husband. Look see." He barked on my face, threw an ID on my face, and stormed out of the room.
The ID does say that he is Rajbeer Singh, 41 years old. Oh my God, he is 21 years older than me, and I'm just 20 years old. I threw it away and started crying about my fate—how could my mama do something like this?
I called my mom instantly. She picked up the call but didn't let me say anything.
In fact, she said, "I'm coming." And cut the call.
After waiting for an hour, the door finally opened, and my mom came in. I got up from my bed and hugged her.
"Maa, please take me. I don't know who he is. He is saying that he is Rajbeer. Maa please............"
She didn't even let me complete, and without saying anything, she slapped me. I'm stiff in my place.
"Maa????" I asked with confused eyes.
"Stop saying this word. I'm not your maa. You were a burden to me. I hate you so much. I only tolerate you because of your fucking father; now he is gone. You are nothing to me. Be grateful that I married you, a nice guy, and didn't sell you in a brothal."She replied with greeted teeth, and the earth is taken under my feet.
"I know you are lying. Please, I would do anything." I said it pleadingly.
"I'm not lying, you cunt. Don't touch me." She said that and pushed me away. "He is your husband, and you have to do whatever he pleases."
"He is not my husband. How could he? He is older than me."
"Believe or not, he is." She said, squeezing my jaw, and each word pierced my heart like a knife.
She threw me on the floor and stormed out. I tried to run after her, but she locked me inside.
And I'm all crying, and I don't remember when sleep consumed me.
