Duang With You

My dad said that only losers still go to Loy Krathong with their friends.

My brother said that I was so lame, that I couldn't even bring myself to ask him to go to Loy Krathong with me.

And my friend said...

"Hey."

This trick works a hundred percent.

" ... "

"Hey."

I licked my dry lips. Damn it. What do I do now?.. The way I practiced, he was supposed to respond with something, not just stare at me like this.

"My friend likes you."

I shut my eyes and blurted it out a little louder. The sound of firecrackers and the usual noise of the Loy Krathong festival filled the air. Everyone was here floating Krathong with their lovers. Of course. First year in university, single like me... it was bound to be a little sad. No, actually, it was so damn depressing.

"Friend?"

"Uh, yeah."Has anyone ever told him? That he's ridiculously cute.

"My name is Buddy."

Cute with no reason at all.

Cute enough to drive some idiot crazy in love since the first day of freshman orientation.

Cute even though he's the same height as me.

Cute even though he dresses so damn carelessly, the oversized student uniform shirt that's never been ironed properly, the same old sneakers he's worn since orientation... or even those pale hands carefully holding a bread Krathong.

"Your dad's friend, my ass."

Bang!

It felt like I just got shot straight through the heart. The bread Krathong he threw hit me right in the face, his expression annoyed. I knew that look well... His friends whistled and teased us, making everyone turn to look. I bet my friends, who had been hiding behind a tree, had also come out to cheer now, blending in with the bright, flashy festival lights the university had set up. And it was that day.

"Duang! Just go for it, man!"

"Duanggg, say it! Modern men, broad shoulders, leather shoes!"

The first day I did more than just secretly watch him practice music after class.

The first day I did more than just walk past him and sit at the backof a food stall, watching his back as he slowly ate the same meal every evening.

"So, is your name Buddy or Duang?"

The first day...

"Duang."

That saying my own name felt so damn hard.

"And? What is it?"

"Would you... mind?"

" ... "

"If we try talking?"

The first day I felt like the dumbest person alive.

I wanted to scream at his face, apologizing for being so lame... so uncool. But yeah, would he mind?

I'm a guy.

He's a guy.

"Can you be more straightforward?"

I swallowed hard.

"Qin! Easy, son, easy!"

"Don't bully him, man. Chill!"

Any more straightforward and I'd be down on one knee proposing, I swear. I scratched my nose awkwardly... accidentally met his eyes, and my heart dropped like I was on a roller coaster.I stopped asking myself whether it would go well or not because how could it ever go anywhere if I never tried?

"Can I court you?"

I went back and forth in my head a hundred times. But after all the calculations, I figured it was better to just say it before he could either agree or reject me. And because of that, I had to gather even more courage than when I was in kindergarten and had to dance on stage in front of hundreds of people on Mother's Day.

He was more than that.

"No... I mean, Duang is going to court you."

More than a hundred people and a stage that made my knees shake.

"I changed my mind."

" ... "

"I'm not asking for permission. Just letting you know."

I'm so old-fashioned.

But well...

"Then go ahead and court me successfully."

Me and him.

Him, who sings so damn well.

Him, who always gets back to the dorm late and buys black coffee to fight off sleepiness every morning.

Him, who's unpredictable like the weather.

And it was that day... that I started courting him.The day we started talking.