Chapter 1
Isobel
It all started as a stupid game at a party on the last weekend of the summer holidays.
I hadn’t even wanted to go to the party, but Patience had forced me to go. She insisted that we had to live a little before we went to university next year or I would spend the entire time I was at Exeter hiding in my room or the library because she wouldn’t be there to make me socialize. She was hoping to get into Oxford. I mean she wasn’t wrong. The only reason I had ever met anyone else was because of her. I didn’t exactly have any other friends, but I did have faces that I knew the name to who would occasionally nod amicably at me in the corridors at school or even get a rare ‘hi’ from.
Patience had been my only friend since we were in pre-school together. She had come up to me on the first day when I was sitting alone in the reading corner holding a picture book upside down over my face trying to hide from all the other kids and told me it was upside down. I was painfully shy. I always had been. It made no sense really because my parents were both extreme extroverts – constantly talking, socializing and laughing with people. Maybe it did make sense I had grown up unable to get a word in, so I had just stopped trying. Patience was similar. She did all the talking for me, so I mostly just had to nod or shake my head in response to her. When she insisted that I meet other people she would tell them my name and reel off a string of facts about me that usually include that I had social anxiety (I had never actually been diagnosed as such, but she assumed I had it. Sometimes I found myself wondering if I wouldn’t be anxious if the people around me actually gave me a chance to speak). The other people would smile sweetly at me then never really make any effort. And of course, I didn’t make any effort either.
We were about to start our last year of A Levels – year thirteen – in a sixth form attached to the same upper school we went to. The school itself was huge despite only teaching years 9-13 there were over 2000 students. The good thing about this was that it meant it was easy to blend in and be invisible most of the time, at least until we reached sixth form where there were fewer students in a class and the teachers were more demanding of our participation. But most of the teachers knew I wouldn’t speak up in front of a class so usually just asked me for yes/no answers or shared my written work with the class as an example answer. I liked it when they did that it made me feel proud of the work I had done but I was also terrified that one of the other students might be critical. It hadn’t happened yet, but I was still always scared.
Anyhow it was August bank holiday weekend, and Patience had just parked her racing-green fiat 500 on the road near the beach where this party was happening. There were dozens of other cars parked up, some of which I recognised as belonging to students from our year at school. About a third of our year had passed their driving test last year and started driving to school, I hadn’t even started lessons yet. My 17th birthday was only in June so I couldn’t have started before then anyway. My parents hadn’t mentioned it either so maybe they didn’t think I was ready to learn yet. But as Patience was willing to drive me everywhere it didn’t really matter right now.
As we got out of the car and started to walk along the road we could hear music echoing from behind the dunes, something upbeat and familiar I recognised from the common room. I could smell woodsmoke too, there must be a bonfire. And there was the rumble of lots of voices and laughter carried on the wind. Patience grinned at me and grabbed my hand pulling me in a jog towards the noise.
As we came out onto the sand from the path between the dunes we saw a large bonfire crackling in the late evening sunshine, there were about 50 people dotted around the area – split off into different friendship groups. As I scanned the groups I spotted three guys from our year with acoustic guitars strumming and singing together. That explained me connecting the music to our common room then. Reuben, Matt and Craig were rarely seen without their guitars and lunchtimes in the common room were basically a jam session for them and a free concert for everyone else. Tom was with them drumming on a box he was sat on and Lisa sat on the sand singing in harmony with them.
Looking left I saw Eve and her group laughing and drinking together. Eve had always been lovely to me, but I was still kind of intimidated by her and her friends. They were what would be considered the popular girls all through school. Effortlessly beautiful and always the centre of attention without even realising it. They weren’t horrible about it though. That was probably what I found difficult. If they were pretty and bitchy then I would have just been able to avoid them and ignore them. But they were nice and that meant that I felt like I couldn’t just ignore them. In fact since we had moved into sixth form I had realised that our school didn’t seem to have the same cliques that you see on high school movies. Sure there were different friendship groups and the common room sort of broke into some cliché groups – the music guys and the popular girls are examples of that. But all in all everyone was happy to mix with each other and there weren’t really any bullies. Well except one. There is always an exception to the rule isn’t there.
Logan Baxter was a loner like me. Except, unlike me, he did everything he could to stand out in a crowd. And he was here at this party. Standing next to the bonfire and staring directly at me. Sizing me up like I was a choice cut of meat that he wanted to devour.
“Why is Logan Baxter staring at you?” Great Patience had seen him too.
“I have no idea and I don’t think I want to find out.” I muttered to her. Getting the message she grabbed my hand again and dragged me off towards the music guys. A few more of their friends sat on the sand around them, a group affectionately known as the corner group – imaginatively titled because there were so many of them that their group occupied a whole corner of the common room. Like American high school cafeterias our sixth form common room had recognised areas that different groups would sit. The corner group had the corner furthest from the door. The popular girls sat at a middle table to their right. The football team usually sat together in the corner opposite the corner group. The area right in the middle was mostly occupied by smaller friendship groups – people who bonded over musical theatre, art or nature. Then the side nearest the door was the nerdier people – myself included. This area gave us a quick escape to get to class on time and was closest to the sixth form ‘library’. In reality this was no more than a couple of bookshelves filled with a few textbooks that were only studied at A-Level. Logan Baxter didn’t sit with any of the groups. He tended to lounge against the wall outside the common room door giving condescending looks to anyone who dared look at him or disappear somewhere to smoke weed.
Patience had always flitted between different groups in the common room, and I was perfectly happy to sit alone in the nerd area reading or doing my coursework when she did this. She had occasionally dragged me with her to sit with other groups but mostly she left me to my own devices. Tonight she wasn’t going to be leaving me alone though. She had already told me that. Even though I had told her I was perfectly happy to sit and people watch if she wanted to socialise without me. No such luck. And so, I found myself with a bottle of lukewarm beer in my hand sitting on a blanket next to Rosa and Wei from the corner group while they debated the merits of communism. Patience was sitting opposite; practically in one of the twins’ (Dan I think) lap and giggling uncontrollably at something he had said.
I felt the blanket next to me tug a little as someone else settled into he sand beside me. I expected it to be another of the corner group, Keely maybe because she had spoken to me on occasion. Turning to smile at the new arrival I choked on my beer when I saw Logan Baxter’s devilish green eyes boring into mine. The side of his mouth moved into a smirk as he took in the shock on my face. Rosa and Wei had halted in their debate, and I could feel their eyes on Logan and me. Turning from him I saw that in fact the entire corner group was staring at myself and the new arrival, curiosity etched in their faces. Clearly they were as surprised as me to find Logan Baxter joining them. Great now I could feel my cheeks reddening with all these eyes on me. Then Logan spoke.
“This party is feeling kind of dull. I was thinking it’s time to play a game and liven things up.” Clearly the corner group thought this was a great idea judging by the excited murmur that went through them and for them it completely explained why Logan had decided to randomly join them. I however was close enough to Logan and knew enough about him to know there was far more to this suggestion than he was saying. I also had the knowing feeling that I was about to very much regret coming to this party.
