Puncture
An Accidental Catwoman Story
By Zabella Burkett
Chapter One
Puncture
The tail had warned her.
Once.
A sharp orange flick against the couch cushion.
Twice.
Harder.
The third struck the woman’s thigh.
Her hand descended anyway.
Fingers disappeared into thick orange fur, rubbing behind one pointed ear.
The cat’s eyes narrowed.
The hand moved beneath her chin.
The cat’s head lifted.
Her eyes closed.
The tail stopped.
The woman’s fingers worked deeper into the soft fur beneath her jaw.
One hind leg stretched.
A paw opened.
Tiny pink pads spread.
Peace settled over the couch.
The woman’s mouth curved.
Her fingers moved down the cat’s neck.
Across one shoulder.
Toward the belly.
The eyes opened.
The tail struck the cushion.
Too late.
Orange fur exploded.
Four legs became twelve.
The woman’s hand jerked backward.
The cat twisted.
One slipper flew.
The woman lurched sideways.
The cat launched from her lap.
One rear paw caught the inside of her forearm on the way down.
Four claws sank straight in.
Not across.
In.
The cat landed on the carpet.
The woman’s mouth opened.
Her entire face folded.
Her free hand clamped over her arm.
The cat stood three feet away.
Tail upright.
One back foot lifted.
The cat licked between her toes.
The woman stared at her.
The cat spread the toes farther.
Another lick.
The woman’s hand slowly lifted from her arm.
Four perfect red dots sat in a neat row.
A bead of blood swelled from the first.
Then the second.
The third joined them.
The fourth took its time.
The woman looked at the four dots.
Then at the cat.
The cat had moved on to washing her ass.
The woman’s eyes narrowed.
The cat continued.
One eyebrow rose.
The cat remained committed to the task.
The woman pushed herself from the couch.
Her palms planted beside her hips.
Her body rocked forward.
Stopped.
Rocked again.
Momentum won.
She stood.
The cat looked up.
The woman pointed at her.
The cat blinked.
The finger remained.
The cat licked one shoulder.
The woman’s lips pressed together.
The finger dropped.
She walked toward the bathroom.
The cat followed.
Behind them, the television continued playing.
A Gotham City news report filled the screen.
Police vehicles crowded a narrow street outside a jewelry store. Broken glass glittered beneath flashing red and blue lights.
The image changed.
A dark figure moved across a rooftop.
Black leather.
Pointed ears.
A whip trailing behind her.
Catwoman.
The cat stopped.
Two orange ears turned toward the television.
The figure leaped between buildings.
A black cape swept across the screen.
Batman landed on the opposite rooftop.
The cat lowered herself.
Her pupils widened.
The cape moved.
One orange paw lifted.
The cape moved again.
The cat launched.
Two front paws struck the television.
Her claws scraped against the glass.
She slid down the screen.
Landed on the entertainment center.
Sat.
One paw lifted.
The cat licked it.
The television remained unimpressed.
From the bathroom, water began running.
The cat jumped down.
She followed.
The bathroom light flicked on.
The woman squinted at herself in the mirror.
Messy bun.
Old T-shirt.
Black leggings.
One slipper.
She looked down.
The other foot was bare.
Her head turned toward the hallway.
The missing slipper lay upside down beside the couch.
The cat sat beside it.
Watching.
The woman turned on the faucet.
Soap.
Water.
Her injured arm moved beneath the stream.
Her shoulders immediately climbed toward her ears.
Her eyes squeezed shut.
Her teeth appeared.
One foot stamped twice against the bathroom floor.
The cat entered.
Sat.
Watched.
The woman opened one eye.
The cat’s head tilted.
Her eye narrowed.
The cat’s head tilted the other direction.
The woman returned to washing.
Four tiny punctures.
Nothing dramatic.
Just four obnoxiously painful little holes.
She dried them.
Ointment.
Four tiny bandages.
She held her arm beneath the bathroom light and inspected it.
The cat rose onto her back legs and planted two front paws against the cabinet.
Her nose lifted.
The woman looked down.
The cat stretched higher.
Sniff.
The woman moved her arm away.
The cat dropped.
The woman turned toward the door.
The cat moved directly into her path.
She stopped.
The cat stopped.
She stepped left.
The cat stepped left.
She stepped right.
The cat stepped right.
The woman’s shoulders dropped.
The cat sat.
The woman stepped over her.
The cat followed.
Kitchen.
The refrigerator opened.
The cat appeared between the woman’s ankles.
Her entire orange head disappeared behind the refrigerator door.
The woman removed a bottle of water.
The cat looked up.
Water.
The cat left.
The refrigerator closed.
The woman walked toward the living room.
The cat followed.
The woman stopped.
The cat stopped.
She turned.
The cat sat.
The woman stared down at her.
The cat stared up.
A long orange tail wrapped neatly around two front paws.
The woman turned around.
Three steps.
Stopped.
The cat stopped.
The woman turned.
The cat sat.
The woman’s hands went to her hips.
The cat blinked slowly.
The woman pointed toward the couch.
The cat looked at the couch.
Then at the woman.
The finger remained.
The cat lifted one paw.
Licked it.
The woman’s head dropped.
Her hand fell.
She continued toward the bedroom.
The cat followed.
Halfway down the hall, the cat stopped.
Her ears rotated.
Her pupils widened.
Her body lowered.
The woman took two more steps before realizing she was alone.
She turned.
The cat’s backside lifted.
Her shoulders dropped.
Her tail puffed.
The woman’s eyebrows rose.
The cat launched.
Orange streaked past her.
The woman’s shirt moved in the wind of it.
The cat hit the living room.
A thump.
Another.
Something rattled.
The cat reappeared.
Full speed.
She passed the woman again.
Into the bedroom.
Onto the bed.
Off the bed.
Under the bed.
Out the other side.
Down the hallway.
Around the corner.
The woman remained exactly where she was.
Her head turned slowly with each pass.
Left.
Right.
Left.
A blur of orange shot through the living room.
Something fell.
The woman’s eyes closed.
Her lips pressed together.
The cat came tearing around the corner.
Stopped.
Instantly.
She sat in the middle of the hallway.
Perfectly composed.
The woman opened her eyes.
The cat lifted one paw.
Licked it.
The woman stared.
The cat cleaned her face.
The woman walked past her.
The cat followed.
The bedroom was dark except for the television.
Blue light flickered across an unmade bed.
A laundry basket overflowing with clean clothes occupied one corner.
Three empty water bottles stood on the dresser.
A bra hung from the doorknob.
The woman climbed into bed.
The mattress dipped deeply beneath her.
She rolled onto her left side.
Adjusted the pillow.
Rolled onto her right.
Pulled the blanket up.
Pushed it down.
One leg came out.
Both went back under.
One came out again.
The cat jumped onto the mattress.
The woman looked over.
The cat walked across her stomach.
One paw landed directly below her ribs.
The woman’s face tightened.
Another landed on her breast.
Her eyes squeezed shut.
The cat continued.
Left.
Right.
Left.
Right.
Every paw somehow located a place that hurt.
The cat reached her chest.
Turned once.
Twice.
Three times.
Sat directly on one breast.
The woman’s eyes opened.
She looked down.
The cat looked back.
One hand gently lifted the orange body.
Moved it six inches left.
The cat stood.
Walked six inches right.
Sat on the breast again.
The woman moved her.
The cat returned.
Again.
Return.
The woman’s hand fell beside her.
The cat settled.
Victory.
The television flickered.
The cat began to purr.
The woman’s eyes slowly closed.
The remote slipped from her fingers.
Minutes passed.
The television screen darkened.
Moonlight replaced it.
Outside, Gotham City continued moving.
Distant sirens drifted between buildings.
A helicopter passed overhead.
Somewhere beyond the apartment windows, a black silhouette crossed the moon.
Inside, the woman slept.
The cat opened one eye.
The woman’s injured hand twitched.
The cat’s other eye opened.
Another twitch.
The cat lifted her head.
The woman’s fingers curled against the sheet.
One fingernail lengthened.
The cat stopped purring.
The nail continued.
Thin.
Dark.
Curved.
Sharp.
It pressed into the sheet.
Another followed.
Then another.
Five narrow claws extended from five sleeping fingers.
The cat stood.
She walked across the woman’s stomach.
The woman did not wake.
The cat reached the hand.
Sniff.
Her whiskers brushed one claw.
Sniff.
One orange paw lifted.
A pink pad touched the tip.
The claw disappeared.
The cat jerked backward.
Her pupils widened.
The finger looked completely normal.
The paw rose again.
Tap.
Nothing.
Another tap.
Nothing.
The cat leaned closer.
Sniff.
The woman’s hand twitched.
Five claws appeared.
The cat jumped backward.
The claws disappeared.
The cat stared.
Her head tilted.
She stepped forward again.
One paw touched the woman’s fingers.
Nothing.
The cat sat directly on the hand.
The woman’s nose twitched.
Once.
Twice.
Outside the window, something struck the porch light.
A moth.
Soft wings fluttered against glass.
The woman’s head turned toward the sound.
Her eyes remained closed.
The moth struck the light again.
Her head moved.
The cat looked toward the window.
Then at the woman.
Another flutter.
Both heads turned.
The cat’s ears moved forward.
The woman’s fingers curled beneath her.
The cat looked down.
Her tail flicked.
The woman stretched.
Arms over her head.
Back arching.
One leg extending.
Then the other.
Her shoulders rolled.
Her spine curved.
Her fingers spread.
Ten claws slid silently from ten fingertips.
Fabric caught.
A quiet rip crossed the room.
The woman relaxed.
The claws disappeared.
The cat stared at the damaged sheet.
Then at the woman’s hands.
She lowered her nose.
Sniff.
The woman’s chest vibrated.
The cat froze.
A low rumble continued beneath the woman’s breathing.
Soft.
Steady.
Deep.
The cat’s head tilted.
The vibration continued.
The cat stepped onto the woman’s chest.
Her nose moved toward the woman’s mouth.
Sniff.
Toward her nose.
Sniff.
One paw touched her cheek.
The woman turned her face away.
The cat followed.
Another paw touched her cheek.
The woman turned again.
The cat climbed onto her shoulder.
The rumbling continued.
The cat lowered herself directly across the woman’s neck.
The rumbling stopped.
The woman shifted.
The cat settled harder.
The woman shifted again.
The cat refused.
Eventually both became still
