The Early Years
Prelude
Marilyn is so scared an upstairs light is on. Marilyn couldn’t concentrate the upstairs light had her attention. Marilyn swears that she sees a shadow moving in the house and she almost loses her breath. Marilyn agreed she needed to get out of his car right now and go inside the house. Marilyn had made peace with her meager existence a long time ago, she says a silent prayer; she carefully unlocks the door and quietly opens the door. He tells Marilyn to go and get his big belt off of the door hook. She hates her father for being a bully and a drunk. Marilyn pulls the covers up to her head, Five minutes goes by and her father never comes into her room. Marilyn had no idea what her mother had done for her. She felt bad for her mother when he left but deep down they both were happier when he was not home.
Chapter I
Marilyn is sad and depressed as she brings home her beautiful baby girl from Grady Memorial Hospital. She was full of love and hopeful expectations of a bright and prosperous future for her and her daughter. Monroe the baby’s father promised to be there always for both Marilyn and the baby and yet the baby isn’t home a full day and Monroe is nowhere to be found and on top of that he is not answering his phone or returning her phone calls.
Marilyn is distraught Monroe has been her whole world. Her youth has been plagued by abuse, alcohol, drugs, sex and neglect; that is, before she met and fell madly in love with Monroe Elmore Prescott. Marilyn is a shy, unattractive and self-conscience girl and yet somehow she had managed to gain the attention of the young and wealthy heir of the Prescott fortune. What should have been a happy and exciting time in Marilyn’s young life has becomes a hellish nightmare that most grown women could not endure. But, as chance would have it Marilyn is about to face one of the biggest challenges of her young life to date.
When she turned 15 Marilyn had, had enough and was desperately looking for a way out. She got involved in drugs and alcohol although she knew firsthand the negative consequences of drinking and using drugs. Marilyn parents drank excessively and smoke marijuana like a chain smoker smoked cigarettes. DFACS had been in their homes so many times before she turned 7 that Marilyn thought it was normal and that every family had to deal with the social workers in their homes.
Her mother had tried once to be a good and loving parent but the need to satisfy her husband and have a man in her life won out. As Marilyn’s mother became more and more dependent on drugs, alcohol and her husband; young Marilyn became less and less of a priority.
Marilyn never had name brand clothes or shoes but her mother made sure that her clothes were always clean. Marilyn never had company over as the house was seldom cleaned and there was never enough food in the house. On her 16th birthday Marilyn knew that she needed an escape; if only, for one night. She didn’t have any pretty clothes per say, but for once someone had invited her to a party. Although she was nervous and scared Marilyn decided that she was going even though her parents had told her that she could not go.
Marilyn knew that getting out of the house would be no problem; when her father came home from his day labor job he would eat and complain about the food that her mother had cooked. Her mother would load the dishwasher full of dirty dishes. The two of them would then go into the family room and turn on the television set. Before long they would begin to smoke and drink and like clockwork they would begin to fight.
Soon after the fighting began they would go into their bedroom where they would fall asleep.
The husband and wife usually slept until the next morning; this has been the existent that Marilyn knew much of her young childhood. She learned early on how to fend for herself because there was no one else around to do it.
Marilyn stayed in her bedroom she was waiting for her parents to stop shouting. She knew then that the alcohol and drugs had kicked in and she would be free to go where ever she wanted and for as long as she wanted because they would not awake until the alarm clock goes off at 6:00 in the morning. Around 9:00 pm all of the shouting had stopped the house was quiet. Marilyn eased out of her
One time when she was five years old she had gone into her parents’ room after one of their fights. Her dad was mad because there was no drugs in the house so he drank all night and lite a cigarette. He had fallen asleep with the cigarette still lite and burning in his hand. Marilyn had walked around the bed and took the cigarette out of her father’s hand and flushed it down the toilet. Her father awoken in a drunken stubbier he accused his five year old daughter of stealing money from him.
Without saying a word her father had made a fist and hit Marilyn hard across her face knocking her to the floor causing blood to come out of her nose. Her mother never awoke. Marilyn often wonders if her mother was truly asleep or if she was faking it because she did not want to have to deal with her and her father again.
Marilyn imagined to herself that at times her mother got tired of playing match maker and go-between, but this night Marilyn really needed her as her father licked severely loosed the tooth in the front of her mouth. The next morning her mother had kept her out of school for three days to protect her father. Marilyn was hesitant but she slowly pushed opened her parents door there was no cigarettes or drugs that she could see only beer cans all over the floor.
Marilyn thought about picking up the beer cans and cleaning up her parents’ room just in case something happened and one of the neighbors had to call the police or the fire department. Marilyn resisted the urge to clean up and decided that if she is going to get out of the house undetected she had better get out of their bedroom and down the stairs. Marilyn turned off the lamp by her parent’s bed and quietly closed their bedroom door.
Marilyn let out a deep breath she was relieved they had not moved one inch. She walked to the front door and took the lock off the door. She waited, still nothing, she closed the door behind her and locked it. She had made it out of the house. Marilyn felt alive and free. She walked up to the end of the block where she caught the Marta bus she was both nervous and excited for the first time in her young life.
Marilyn had never sneaked out of the house before although she had numerous occasions where she could have and no one would have known that she was gone. For the most part Marilyn was a good girl she was obedient to her mother and she tried really hard to respect her father, but he often made this almost impossible for her to do that.
Marilyn stood at the bus stop there was only one other person at the bus stop. Suddenly, she becomes afraid she has never ridden the bus at night alone before. She couldn’t help but too think how she had spent most of her early childhood alone in her parents’ house. Marilyn didn’t have any friends at school she never participated in any of the fun activities at school. Her parents never attended any of the meetings or conferences; all Marilyn did was go to school and then back home.
She was so happy when one of her classmates had given, her an invitation to her sixteen birthday party. The bus arrived and Marilyn and the other patron paid their fee and got on the bus. Marilyn walked with her head held down. A man sitting mid-way on the bus in the outside aisle stuck his foot out just as Marilyn was walking by almost causing her to trip and fall to the floor. The man never looked up or apologized to Marilyn.
Marilyn was used to ridicule she did not let out so much of a squeal she got herself together and then she walked quickly to the back of the bus where she took a seat next to an elderly bag lady. The lady smelled bad but Marilyn didn’t mind she knew how the lady felt. While, Marilyn never smelled neither were her clothes ever dirty the kids at school still picked on her and called her dirty and ugly.
Marilyn had gotten used to it she reckon to herself that a person if she has to can get use to just about anything. As the bus pulled off Marilyn begins to think about all of the things that could go wrong. What if her parents awaken during the night and wanted another beer or what if they got up to smoke a cigarette and fell back to sleep with the cigarette still burning. But, tonight Marilyn didn’t want to think about her drudgery life or her parents. Tonight Marilyn just wanted to be a teenager doing things with other kids her own age and having fun.
The party is being held in the West End side of town. Marilyn remembers hanging out at the mall with her mom as a young child. They would be at the mall all day but not in the stores and certainly not shopping. Her mother once upon a time was an incredibly beautiful woman with a contagious and equally beautiful smile. Everyone seemed to love her mother when Marilyn was a young girl; especially the men. Marla had a certain way about her back then that commanded both attention and respect.
But, somehow over the years her husband Whittaker had beaten both the spunk and life out of Marla Whittaker. Marilyn and her mother would hang out in the parking lot of the West End mall and solicit money from men who were infatuated with her good looks and infectious smile. There were times when Marilyn and her mother would get enough money to pay a bill or buy food for a couple of days.
During her early years her dad was in and out of her life even though he was in the home at that time he never paid Marilyn any attention, in fact, the only time he noticed Marilyn was when he was cursing her out or whipping her with his belt. Marilyn cringed when she thought about her fathers’ belt. Her father had even managed to name the dam belt he called it white lightening because he swore one time that he had hit Marilyn so hard with the belt that lightning struck outside of their bedroom window. On occasion he still beats her with his belt; especially when he was upset with her mother or was coming down off his high. Marilyn became worried she thought about turning around and going back but her feet wouldn’t move.
She could hear the conductor the next stop was the West End. Marilyn held her breath and blew it out ever so gently. She had managed to sneak out of the house without any problems and gotten on the Marta bus all by herself; and soon she will be at her first party ever. Marilyn was nervous what if the other girls made fun of her like they did in school. Marilyn didn’t care anymore and she didn’t care if no one said anything to her. She had gotten use to that she just wanted to be in their company, if only, just for a little while.
Marilyn stepped off the bus she walked across the street to a vacant warehouse that had been renovated into a club for teens. She walked slowly up the gravel side walk and pushed on the door. The door was locked. As Marilyn was about to turn and walk away a voice behind her said knock three times. Marilyn knocked on the door three times and the door open. She looked over her shoulder and thanked the handsome young man.
She didn’t recognize him from school or the neighborhood. The young man smiled at Marilyn and her heart skipped a beat. No one had ever smiled at her like that before and for so long. Marilyn almost lost her breath she wanted to run up to him and put her arms around him. But, she knew that he would not be interested in her.
Inside the club the party was jumping. Marilyn saw almost the entire student body at the party. Just once she wanted to be this popular- she wanted to be liked. She looked in the corner and she saw all of the presents. Marilyn hadn’t thought of buying a gift; mostly, because she didn’t have money to buy one. Michelle and Karen were on gift patrol and when they saw Marilyn entering the club they begin to snicker.
Karen says look at her who invited her she looks like the bag lady who rides up and down the bus line. Their snickering was so loud that Marilyn and some of the other party goers could hear them. Michelle tells Marilyn that entrance into the club requires one wrapped gift for the birthday girl. Marilyn says lowly I don’t have a gift I don’t have any money. Karen jumps in the conversation well I guess you are going to have to leave then.
Just as Marilyn was about to turn and walk away the handsome stranger presented a gift and said this is from me and her. Karen and Michelle were taken aback; the handsome older teenager was the one and only Monroe Elmore Prescott. Monroe and his family moved into the school district one county over exactly one year ago. Monroe parents’ had lots of money but, he was sort of a rebel, didn’t act or dress like a teenager with a hefty trust fund in his near future.
Monroe spent a lot of time on the other side of the track. He enjoyed the way the girls giggle when he came into a room. The boys were impressed by his buff physique and athletic abilities. It is easy to say that Monroe Prescott fitted in from the very first day he came to town. Karen sniffs her nose at Marilyn but she is very careful not to let Monroe see her doing it.
Marilyn turns to thank the young man and she clumsily bumps into him almost knocking him down. Marilyn is so embarrassed; she cannot understand why she is such a klutz at times and why things never seem to work out for her. The other girls in the room all begins to laugh. When Marilyn decides to head for the door and leave Monroe grabs her by the arm and asks her for a dance. Marilyn is so excited and scared and nervous all at the same time; the best looking guy at the party asked her to dance.
Marilyn nods her head yes. Monroe escorts Marilyn to the dance floor. He tells her his name and then asks what her name is. But, Marilyn didn’t hear a word that he had said she was so caught up in the moment she could not believe that a boy had asked her to dance; and not just any boy the most handsome boy at the whole party. Marilyn voice is muffled and when she speaks the volume of her voice is so low that Monroe can’t hear a word that she is saying over the loud music. He asks if she would like to step outside on the balcony with him. Marilyn simply nods her head again to reply yes.
Marilyn and Monroe are standing on the balcony he leans close to her and tells her thank you. Marilyn never once looking up says for what? Monroe says for saving me back there. I only came because this girl kept on inviting me and I told her that I would come through. But, they are so high school don’t you think? Marilyn did not respond so Monroe asked the question again, don’t you think that this entire party is so high school. Marilyn says I don’t know I think that they are pretty cool. Monroe tells Marilyn that he thinks that she is very pretty.
Marilyn lowers her head. She tells Monroe you don’t have to say that to be polite. I know that I don’t look pretty and that my clothes are old and ugly. Monroe reaches out and takes her hand and says, well you Marilyn whatever your last name is look very pretty to me. Marilyn smiles and says Whittaker my name is Marilyn Marie Whittaker. Monroe smiles and says very nice to meet you Ms. Marilyn Marie Whittaker. I am Monroe Elmore Prescott. Prescott repeats Marilyn your family lives in the big house on the other side of town and owns Prescott Electric, Prescott Furniture and Prescott Inn. Monroe smiles and replies guilty as charged.
Marilyn begins to feel very small around Monroe now. She had remembered hearing her father say one time that the Prescott can buy and sell just about anyone that they wanted too. Marilyn thanked Monroe for his assistance earlier and tells him that she must get back inside. Truth is, Marilyn suddenly felt very insignificance around Monroe he comes from money and she is lucky if their lights, water and gas are on from month to month.
Monroe tries to get her to change her mind but Marilyn insists that she must go inside. Monroe is talking to Marilyn but she cannot hear him she has completely zoned out. She is fantasizing about her and Monroe standing out on the patio kissing. She closes her eyes and Monroe leans in close to her he takes her in his arms and strokes her hair and face. He places a long wet and steamy kiss on her mouth and she can feel her knees trembling and she almost buckles under the excitement and pleasure. She begins to slowly caress his body and pulls him close to her body she looks up into his face and she tells him that she loves him.
At that exact moment Monroe gently touches her shoulder and says; if you are ready to go back inside we can go now. Marilyn blushes she is certain that Monroe can read her mind. She is embarrassed and she says, yes, I am ready to go inside now Monroe stand and says then please allow me to walk you back inside. He offers his arm to Marilyn and she reluctantly takes it. The two walk back into the party arm-in-arm. Everyone in the party stops and stares at Marilyn; the girls aren’t laughing anymore; right now they are secretly envious of Marilyn. Up until this very moment no one ever took Marilyn seriously; she was to them just the poor little ratchet bag girl at their high school and nothing more.
Marilyn is nervous everyone is looking at the two of them and she tries to let Monroe arm loose but, he presses his body close to her preventing her from moving her arm. She tells Monroe that she wants to leave now and he says okay. They walk toward the coat closet and checks out Monroe expensive windbreaker and the two head for the exit. As they reach the door Monroe asks her if she is certain that she wants to leave now. He tells her that he is having a good time and would like to spend some more time with her.
She tells Monroe that she has to hurry to get the bus before the last one stop running. Monroe insists that she allow him to give her a ride in his new 526 Mercedes Benz. Monroe’s parent had bought him the brand new Benz simply because it was a Friday and nothing more. Marilyn is nervous but she knows that if she misses the last bus she will be stuck until 6:00 in the morning when the next bus runs. They walk toward Monroe car he presses the button in his hand to unlock the door. He then opens the door for Marilyn and when she is safely inside he closes the door.
She looks up at him and smiles and says a very low and sweet thank you. Karen, Michelle and the other girls are looking on in disbelief they wanted so much to be Marilyn at this very moment. Monroe asks for directions to Marilyn house and she becomes ashamed she does not want him to see her house or where she lives. Monroe smiles at her and she melts; she gives him the directions to her house.
On the way to her house he tries to engage Marilyn in small talk but she was just too shy and to uncomfortable and didn’t say much the whole ride to her house. So Monroe did all of the talking; nothing in particular just whatever came up and Marilyn was content just listening to him talk. When they pulled in front of her house Marilyn is so scared an upstairs light is on. She couldn’t remember if she had left the light on or if one of her parents had gotten up. Monroe wants to sit and talk for a little spell; just a little while longer but, Marilyn couldn’t concentrate the upstairs light had her attention.
She tells Monroe that she has to go inside. Monroe asks her why, tomorrow is Saturday and we don’t have to go to school. Monroe pulls out all of the stops trying to get Marilyn to sit and talk with him but all to no avail. Marilyn swears that she sees a shadow moving in the house and she almost loses her breath. Monroe says alright then but, only if you allow me to see you again. Marilyn agreed she needed to get out of his car right now and go inside the house. He asks her for her phone number and Marilyn mumbles very lowly that they don’t have a phone. Marilyn is ashamed there are so many things that her family does not have that others family do.
Marilyn had made peace with her meager existence a long time ago, but she was not willing to give up on her mother yet and it pained her that her mother was the butt of so many thoughtless jokes. Monroe takes out a piece of paper and writes his name and cell number on the paper. Marilyn takes the paper and puts it in her pocket. For the better part of her young life Marilyn has always been a tom boy. But tonight she wished she had a purse so that Monroe could have seen her put his number in the purse instead of crumbled up in her front pocket. She waves Monroe off but he continues to sit he is waiting for her to get safely inside.
She is worried that if he does not leave soon he will witness firsthand how her father deals with her, but, she rather like the idea of him sitting and waiting for her to get safely inside of the house but she needed for him to leave now. If one of her parents are up she doesn’t want Monroe to hear or see them yelling at her. She says a silent prayer that neither one of them are standing behind the door when she opens it. She carefully unlocks the door and quietly opens the door.
She quickly steps inside of the house and closes the door without ever looking back at Monroe. Monroe sits for another minute and then drives away. Marilyn tries to walk slowly up the stairs in the old house which makes a lot of noise with each step. As it turns out she didn’t need to be quiet after all. Both of her parents are awake and when she walks past their bedroom her father yells for her to come in their room.
Marilyn had a good time tonight so whatever punishment that her parents have in mind for her she concludes that the night was worth it. She met Monroe Elmore Prescott and for once the other girls were jealous of her and not the other way around even if it was for just one night. Her father immediately accuses her of sleeping around with lots of boys. Her mother asks her how long has she being sneaking out of the house. She tells her mother that this was the first time and that she is not sleeping with anyone.
In fact, Marilyn has never had sex, has never been kissed by a boy. Marilyn has never been out of the house alone after school except for tonight. Her father yells and says that she is lying. He turns to his wife and says if you had been a better mother that his daughter would not be a tramp for boys to do their business in.
Whittaker rumbles on and tells Marilyn that she is turning out to be just like her mother. He tells Marilyn to go and get his big belt off of the door hook. Marilyn knew better than to argue with him even when he wasn’t high. She does as he instructs her to do and he beats Marilyn with the belt until she almost passes out. Marilyn crawls out of her parents’ room into her own shabby bedroom. She is too sore to stand erect she crawls onto her bed and tries to console herself. She hates her father for being a bully and a drunk.
Many of nights she had prayed that her father would die or be killed and immediately afterward she would always feel bad for thinking such evil thoughts about her father. Tonight was no different she was in so much pain that she could not help but wished that he would just go away and never come back again. She has always been close to her mother but her mother was never able to defend or protect her from her father or the teasing and name calling from the schools at kids or in the neighborhood. Marilyn closes her eyes and tries to forget about the pain of her beating and her life.
She thinks about Monroe Elmore Prescott and the way that he treated her like she was a beautiful and worthwhile person. She chuckled as she pictured all of the girls at the party looking at her when she came back into the party arm-in-arm with Monroe. Marilyn drifted off to sleep. For the first time since she was a very small child Marilyn had a peaceful night sleep and she owed it all to Monroe.
Around six in the morning she heard her parents’ alarm clock go off. Her father yells at her mother and throws the clock on the floor. He tells her every weekend it is the same thing you forget to turn the alarm clock off and the dam things it wakes me up. Her mother now off of her high is now quiet and subdued. Marilyn can’t hear what her mother says. But, whatever it was it sets her father off and he begins screaming. I go to work Monday through Friday to pay the bills and to keep clothes and food in this house. I don’t want to be disturbed on the weekend it is my time to rest and now your daughter is turning out just like you sneaking out of the house and running around with God knows whom.
In fact, I am not done with her how dare she disobey me and sneak out the house. That girl got it coming to her and good and I am going to give it to her. Marilyn can hear her mother well this time. She tells her father that he is not to touch Marilyn under any circumstance or she will call the police. Her fathers’ yell and curses and then asks her, who will take care of you then? Marilyn knew that it was a moot point but, she admired her mother just the same for saying it.
Marilyn pulls the covers up to her head and waits for her father to come and finish what he started last night. Five minutes goes by and her father never comes into her room. Marilyn had no idea what her mother had done for her. Her father had gotten the belt off the hook and was heading to her bedroom when her mother pulled out the big butcher knife that she kept in her night stand. She held it to his neck and threatens to cut him if he moved toward the bedroom door.
Her father did not go into Marilyn room to beat her but; he did beat Marilyn’s mother and good. Marilyn couldn’t stand to hear her mother screaming anymore. She knew that she had to get out of her parents’ home and soon. She felt bad for her mother; before the alcohol and drugs her mother had been a good mother. She was very protective of her baby daughter once upon a time she took very good care of Marilyn and took her everywhere that she went. But, that was years ago and the years with her husband had taken its’ toll on her and she just couldn’t fight him anymore.
Marilyn knew that her father hated laziness; except when it was him that was being lazy. She got out of the bed although it felt like every inch of her body hurts. She goes into the bathroom and quickly washes up. She puts on a sweat suit mostly to hide the bruises but to also pad her in case her father decided to beat her again. Marilyn opened the old refrigerator and looked inside two six packs of beer a half of pint of gin and one cup of milk. She picks up the carton of eggs and there are only four eggs in the carton. She walks to the pantry and takes down the bag of opened grits and the last can of Salmon. Marilyn wanted to please her father maybe he will eat and leave and stay gone until Sunday like he always does. She felt bad for her mother when he left but deep down they both were happier when he was not home.
Tracey Conley Bray
