What is your opinion?
Lovable Story
"This story is very touching but also lacks a little in one or two places. Firstly, a six year old child does not quite think like Zoe does. I feel that Zoe should only be able to focus rather simple emotions at each moment. The next thing is the spider, Esmeralda, she is a nice character but her dialogue feels weak and repetitive. Try to think of different phrases for her not just: "My Child". Overall this is a story which feels like it is supposed to teach us something. Maybe add a narrative at the end which talks about how she resolved the problem with her friends (very shortly though). Overall a sweet story. Please feel free to contact me for more input. Caleb"
First part only
"The idea is interesting, but there's always room for more improvement.. The grammatical errors and writing style need some work, otherwise, you have potential. Keep it up!"
