Love, Eliot

I hovered the mouse over his username. The green light flickered next to his name. I felt far too much like Jay Gatsby; except Jay didn’t rely on Daisy for permission to cum.

I envied that.

The mattress springs creaked underneath me as I shifted my weight for the tenth time. Waiting for his first message of the day never failed to be torture, and he knew that.

I thrummed my fingers on the keyboard while the computer screen glared at me. My mother’s good-natured advice scrolled through my mind and I dug my glasses out from underneath the pile of pillows on my bed.

Straining my eyes is the last thing I need.

Although walking around campus with red eyes, whether from crying or smoking, wouldn’t be that suspicious, I preferred not to draw attention to myself.

A notification popped onto my screen just as I settled back into my spot; a new message waited for me in my inbox. I opened it before he could pretend to walk away.

“Quote of the day?”

I typed my response. “Only those who risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.”

“T. S. Eliot, nice.”

“I’m surprised you got that so fast. Usually, you have to Google it first.”

“All English majors know Eliot.”

I scoffed at his latest attempt to tease me with his identity. “You’re no English major.”

“I could be.”

“But you’re not.”

Dots appeared in our chatbox as he typed out something clever and then deleted it before coming up with something else. “Do you want to come tonight or not?”

Fuck. It had been over a week since we found time to blow off steam, or so we called it.

For the first few weeks of classes, I had no free time. Being a student himself, he understood the academic demands of our university.

“You know I do.” I shoved my textbooks onto the floor without considering the annoyance of my downstairs neighbors.

“What are you wearing?”

“Sweats.”

“Take them off.”

I didn’t waste time following orders. “Done. My legs are freezing.”

“Your own fault for going to school up north.”

I rolled my eyes. “I know.”

“I’ll warm you up, promise.”

“Can I touch myself now?”

“Yes, but only over your panties.”

Oh. Apparently, he had no intention of making our meeting quick. I glanced at the clock on my wall and decided that I had time to spare.

I stretched over my bed and let my hand roam the subtle curves of my body. My lips parted as I settled over my damp panties.

It had been too long.

“I’m already wet.”

“And we haven’t even gotten to the fun part.”

“Well, let’s get there quickly, please.”

I tried not to focus on the growing warmth between my legs.

“Take off your bra. You can touch yourself, but don’t play with your nipples.”

“And if I do?”

“Be prepared for the consequences.”

“Sounds like a threat.”

“No, baby. That’s a promise.”

I wiggled my hips against my hand and groaned. His blatant flirting gave me mixed feelings, but then, he made me forget them.

“Go under your panties and continue to rub yourself while circling your nipples.”

My fingers crept under the elastic waistband and stroked my aching clit. I bit my bottom lip and considered disobeying–coming immediately.

It was possible for me to reach the edge within minutes, considering how my body responded to the gentlest touches he permitted. My nipples were hardening with each passing second; they ached for more attention.

“Can I finger myself?” I typed with my left hand and disregarded pleasantries.

“Not yet. Pinch your sensitive nipples and tell me how bad you want to.”

I stifled a frustrated groan. “Seriously, it’s been too long for this. I need something, anything, inside of me.”

“Anything?”

“Shut up.”

“Fine,” he wrote, “Tease yourself for me.”

I rolled my eyes, but followed his instructions. Being painfully horny while relinquishing control brought me to climax quicker than masturbating alone.

Pitiful moans and whimpers filled my room. If I didn’t keep it quiet, my suitemate would complain the next time I ran into her.

“I can’t stop myself from moaning.”

“You’ll have to or else you’ll be gagged.”

My heart raced at the idea; I pictured him tying me down and doing all the naughty-sweet nothings we had gotten off to for so long.

“What if I want to be?”

“Then you’re dirty.”

“That’s been established.”

“Get the tie and put it between your lips. Make it tight.”

I scrambled off of my bed and dug through the cluttered mess inside my drawers. Two weeks into classes and I’m already living like a pig. I found the red-plaid tie buried underneath my panties and socks; I bought it solely for our online trysts.

I settled back into bed with the ‘gag’ tied around my head. I bit down on the sleek fabric tucked in between my lips.

“Gagged and at your disposal.”

“We’ve established that.”

“Ha. Ha. Can I come now?”

“No. Countdown from fifty while rubbing your clit.”

“I’m gagged, remember?”

“In your head, smartass.”

I smiled to myself and laid with a pillow underneath my hips. I did as he said and started counting down. The throbbing in my clit grew until I couldn’t lie still; my hips twitched, desperate for him to dig his fingers into my skin and—

One.

When I finally removed my fingers, my panties were soaked.

“You’re so fucking evil.”

“I take it that went over well, huh?”

“Don’t make me wait anymore.”

“You can finger yourself because you were such a good girl.” Sarcasm radiated off of the screen.

But I didn’t care.

I slipped my panties to my knees and felt my eyes roll into the back of my head as two fingers sunk into me. My hips bucked at the sudden invasion and crude swears formed on my gagged lips.

“Are you satisfied now?” The notification knocked me out of my trance.

“You know I’m not.”

“Too bad. You’ll have to wait for more.”

“Wait, what?”

“I said I’d make you come today. I didn’t say when. Go outside and get breakfast. Maybe you’ll even see me.”

“You’re an ass.”

“Just for that, edge three times before leaving your dorm.”

I grumbled. “Fine.”

“Good girl,” he said, knowing my disdain for being called that. “See you tonight.”

The green light flickered off and suddenly, I was alone. Frustration swelled underneath my skin and I itched for release.

I debated disobeying; the temptation grew as I rubbed myself to the edge of what would have been an earth-shaking orgasm. Then, before I went through with it, I pulled my fingers away.

I sighed. One.