What is your opinion?
N vd Merwe
"I dont like the ending. Its as if you are in t middle of the story and then it ends abruptly."
Superfantastic potential!
"So, I don't normally write reviews for material with only four chapters. However, I found this partial novel so engrossing, and so well done, it deserves a review. As with reviews of all partial material, I have reduced my plot rating (because how you measure out the plot and end your story counts for something and is unknown). I feel like this is a novel with huge potential. The two stories, Hazel in the past and Mandy in the present, both are quite touching. In particular, as I read Hazel's story, I am completely drawn in by the deft decsriptive prose and the emotionally charged scenes. I care so much for young Hazel and want to know what happens to her at this dreadful school. The scenes at the school felt like I was reading a masterfully constructed novel from an accomplished author. I feel like in the first few chapters, we haven't seen as much of Mandy's story. I'd like to see more of the actual tension between her and her husband, though I'm sure this is (sadly) to come. Again, her daily life is woven together so well, I really felt sorry for her, especially when we realize her husband is up to no good. What is missing here, of course, is the intertwining of Mandy and Hazel's stories, and how Mandy can learn something from her friend. What I'm hoping for here is the caretaker becomes taken care of by the wisdom that is inherent in Hazel's story. I'd like to see her tell it to Mandy....or something...I guess it's up to the author. This is less of a review per se than my own personal wish list for how this continues. There are some typos throughout, especially in Chapter 4. Suggest scrubbing this after writing the rest. Also, suggest putting settings on chapters so people like myself (i.e., American or British) know this is in Ontario. Again, this partial work is well-written, engaging, heartbreaking, and well worth the read. It reminds me of Mitch Albom or Nicholas Sparks--an emotionally charged rollercoaster of a read that is bittersweet. Also, it bears noting that the author seemed to have some trepidation about putting her work out there for all to see. This is the second time I've reviewed fantastic material that somebody was afraid to show. Related to this, I have two strong recommendations: 1)Have no fear- your work is well above average. Know the worth of your work. 2)Finish this book. It's a great story and deserves to be finished. And I would like to see the middle and the end of this touching story. Map out the plot, further connect and intertwine these characters, help Mandy grow, etc. Bring this to the light of day! Best of luck --r"
