What is your opinion?
The beginning
"This review is of the first chapter and future chapters have yet to be released. It's a really, really, great first chapter. The beginning is told from the PoV from the MC and pulls the reader into wondering "what comes next" by basically starting at the end. Having ended the chapter, I feel intrigued as to what comes next and that's a great feeling for a reader to have. I'm looking forward to where this book will go. Tone was wonderful from start to finish for the MC. Details expand on a life the MC has created and how he got to where he is. It's a taste of history, but it's enough to build a solid base for the reader to stand on in knowing where the story is going to start and who they will be following. Another thing I appreciated was that the author edited the chapter. It is nice to read something without pausing every few sentences and thinking, "oh, that needs a period." Great work with the grammar and the plot sounds original, unique, and intriguing. Three things an author really needs to make their novel stand out and I am excited to read this one to the end."
Good Control of Voice
"If this is the beginning for your writing, you've done an excellent job. Giving the narrator such a unique place to start (a week before the end) creates an umbrella over what I assume will be the flashbacks to come. The voice of the narrator maintains a consistent tone, and the vocabulary matches the carefree attitude of this narrator. I've just begun reading on here, and I come across quite a bit I can't really get into, but this kept me going. The only thing I'd watch out for is using the same word in different context so close together like endlessly trying and end. Maybe try exhaustively trying since end comes so closely after. Other than that, I can see you edited carefully and removed the inevitable typos, and I appreciate that. Good job."
Nice
"The technical aspects were nailed perfectly. You should consider more ambitious projects. My low score on plot is only because of the short length, not because I was disappointed in the quality or anything. Writing stories of this length is easy. So don't stop here, keep going."
