Matilda's House

“Now, I’ve got to warn you. These guys are a bit eccentric, so if you want to take a minute, then feel free.”

“You’re a strange one Dre.” Jo said, “Can we just go inside, I’m becoming an Icey-pop.”

“Just saying,” Dre said.

“Fine, you get ‘calling it’ rights later. Can we please?” She gestured towards the door.

Dre knelt down and found a key under one of the several pot plants littering the steps. He gave Jo a look, before turning back to the door. Jo heard something like tearing fabric, but once the door was open, the room inside seemed rather ordinary.

“I don’t know what I was expecting,” Jo confessed.

“Best not to expect anything,” Dre said, putting the key back, “I’m telling you, it doesn’t work the way you think it should. Consider that the only constant.”

He led the way into the house, and Jo closed the door behind them. She could hear kids playing in the backyard.

“Aunt Matilda?” Dre called down the hall.

“Dreamboy, get in here” a voice called back. “I need some big strong arms to stir these.”

As they came into the kitchen a woman caught Dre by the shoulders and immediately steered him towards the stove where several large pots were boiling. “Vigilance Dre, I don’t want noth’n burn’n in my kitchen.” Then she turned to Jo, “Joandra, isn’t it?”

“Um, it’s Jo, actually.” She said, holding out a hand.

Matilda laughed, “Handshakes are for strangers, honey, come here.” The large woman wrapped herself around Jo, picking her up off the floor. Jo’s feet swung from side to side as Matilda began to dance.

“You’re a scrawny one, ain’t ya,” Matilda said, putting her down again, “don’t worry, we can fix that.” She dipped a spoon into one of Dre’s pots and tasted it. “Joactually” Matilda repeated, as if to herself, “I like that.” She turned back to Jo, “well Jo, we’ve got punch mix’n or salad chop’n left to do, which one do you want?”

“You want me to help?” Jo asked.

“Of course” Matilda exclaimed, “we’re almost done, I just need a few more hands on deck. So which one, mix’n or chop’n?

“Um, chopping please,” Jo replied.

“Excellent choice,” said Matilda, “and its Aunt Matilda to you, or just plain Aunty. We ain’t got all that formality up in here.” Aunt Matilda put a thick wooden chopping board in front of Jo, along with a knife and a small pile of vegetables. Then she called outside “Darren, how’s them snags com’n?”

“Not burnt” came the reply.

“That’s right”, she said to herself again, “not in my house.”

“How do you want these cut?” Jo asked.

“Any way you like, precious, there’s no wrong ways in this house.” Aunt Matilda started pulling juice bottles and lemonade out from the cupboard. “Now, Joactually” she gave a chuckle, “I want to hear all about you. Where are you from? How’s school? What are your parents like? Tell me everything.”

“Well,” Jo said, “I actually live just down this road, and one street over.”

Aunt Matilda asked, “Which road is that, Hun, I’m all lost with geography.”

Jo tried to explain, “You take a left at the end of this road, then…”

“She means which country” Dre interrupted.

Jo rolled her eyes. “Is there something wrong with him?” she asked Aunt Matilda.

“No, no” Aunt Matilda protested, “noth’n wrong with nobody in this house.” She started pouring two coloured bottles into the punch bowl. “We like to think he’s just creative.”

“Or a liar” Jo retorted.

“What kind of lying, dear?” Aunt Matilda asked, now selecting cutlery one by one out of a draw.

“He’s been telling these weird stories all week,” Jo explained, “I kept trying to bring him back to the real world, but he’s been insisting upon these childish…”

Jo screamed, dropped the salad knife, and backed into the furniture behind her. She immediately tripped over a chair and fell to the floor.

“Is everything alright, dearest?” Aunt Matilda asked.

Aunt Matilda had been sorting cutlery 3 feet away from the two bottles, still suspended in mid-air as they emptied themselves into the punch bowl.

Without a word, Jo pointed at the hovering bottles, then scrambled out the back door, which slammed behind her.

It was warm outside, unlike when they arrived, and half a dozen kids were playing on some kind of obstacle course. It only took Jo a second to realize that several of the chairs, stools and boxes were also floating in the air, and two kids were climbing from one dangling object to the next. One child waved at her.

Jo let out another noise and frantically ran towards a narrow space between a shed and the fence. She squeezed down the narrow corridor and curled up into a ball. She was breathing so quickly, but couldn’t seem to get enough air.

A minute later Dre poked his head through the opening, “Are you alright?”

“Go away!” Jo yelled between sobs.

“It’s alright, I know its hard to take in at first, that’s why I tried to…” Dre’s head disappeared again, it sounded like Aunt Matilda was whispering something to him.

“It’s ok” Dre continued, I can walk you home if you want? Or you could stay and have some food? Whatever you want. Take your time Jo.”

Dre disappeared again, and Jo tried to control her frantic breaths.

After a long while, Jo reappeared from behind the shed. She was red-faced, and still a mess from crying. Dre came over.

“I got you some punch.” He said, holding out a glass.

Jo took it, and sipped it slowly. “Thank you” she said quietly, “I think you called it.”

Dre smiled. “We’re having lunch now; do you want something?” he asked.

“I’m really confused” Jo said, “if its all the same to you, I think I just want to figure this out for a minute.”

“Sure thing” said Dre, “take your time, ask any questions you want. We have all day.”

The kids were lining up at the barbeque as a man handed out sausages and onion. Aunt Matilda ferrying more food out from inside. The obstacle course of furniture was laying on the grass.

“We can grab these chairs and sit over there if you want” Dre offered, “away from everyone?”

Jo took a chair. “What do you mean ‘lunch’?” she asked as they put their chairs down again. “We had lunch hours ago at school, it must be almost 4 o’clock.”

“Ah”, Dre said, pausing for a moment. “Are you sure you don’t want to start with a simpler question?”

Jo gave him a look.

“I just want you to feel better, and that’s a bit of a complex one” Dre explained.

Jo’s look didn’t change.

“Ok” Dre conceded. “We haven’t time travelled, if that’s what you’re thinking. Aunty has houses in a few countries, except, it’s kind of the same house.” He looked at Jo for approval.

“So, time zones then?” Jo suggested.

Dre brightened. “That’s right” he said.

“So” Jo continued, still working this out, “the front door was some kind of portal?”

“Not really” Dre continued, “It’s like, the houses are all in different places, but the rooms, and I guess the yard out here too, are all in the same place.”

Jo’s expression didn’t change. “So, a portal then” she repeated.

The man from the barbeque had just come over and was standing beside them. “Co-terminus hyper-dimensionality” he said, “it’s better than a thermostat in winter. Here, I saved you the last ones.” The man gave them both a plate with sausages on them. “I’m Auntie’s husband, by the way. Darren” he said shaking Jo’s hand, “great to meet you Jo. Sorry about Matilda, I think she likes to show off to the newbies, and sometimes doesn’t know where to draw the line.”

“What do you mean” Jo asked.

Darren began gently moving his hands in the air and making a long ‘woo’ sound. After seeing Jo’s confused face he tried again, “levitating, you know, things floating in the air? I assumed that’s what you were freaking out about earlier. There was some outside, too. Was that it?”

“Yeah” said Jo, “that was Aunt Matilda?”

“She didn’t mean to upset you” Darren said, “I think she must have misjudged the situation. She’ll apologise when you’re ready.”

“Is she psychic?” Jo asked.

Darren laughed. “You’re thinking of telekinesis” he said, “psychics have to do with crystal balls and cards and things, that’s not real.”

Jo looked at Dre, who shrugged his shoulders.

“I guess technically you could call it telekinesis” Darren continued, “but just because she can lift things doesn’t make her any different to you or I. You don’t have to treat her like an alien or something, she’s perfectly normal. Even the…” he started moving his hands again and making the long ‘woo’ sound. “You get used to it” he said.

“So all that weird stuff Dre’s been saying, that’s all true?” Jo asked.

“It’s true” Darren said, “I am the best sausage-sizzler this side of Kentucky.”

“He’s joking” Dre explained, “that’s another thing you’ll have to get used to.”

Darren laughed again, and ruffled Dre’s hair. Dre looked unimpressed.

“So” Jo asked, “if the house is in several places at once, which side of Kentucky are we?”

Darren touched a finger to his nose, and pointed at Jo. “You’re a quick one, I like that” he said. He elbowed Dre in the ribs, “she’s a keeper, buddy. Well done” and walked off.

Dre began to blush. “So what do you think?”

“They are good sausages” Jo said, chewing a mouthful.

“I mean…” Dre began.

“I think its cool” Jo said. “Sorry for not believing you all week, its all pretty out there, and I’m still getting my bearings, but I like it.”