Mending a broken heart

We're on our way to pick James up so we can attend his friend, Beth's party. Old, dear sweet Beth. You'd think so as well if you were to meet her. She has this front she puts up that will make you fall completely in love with her, yet underneath all that facade, you get a conniving little bitch. Wolf in sheep's clothing.

I actually never saw it coming, you know. No signs, nothing. It was like one of those moments you're not paying attention and you end up face palming a tree.

When James started attending our school beginning of last year, he had already made a few friends of his own that happened to not be at our school. I was more than happy to meet new people and when he introduced Beth, I instantly liked her, queue gag reflexes. Me and Mike, had recently just been dating for about half a year by the time we met Beth, but Mike had always been my best friend since elementary.

Mike was and still is a party maniac and with the combination of James who happens to keep a party diary, they constantly attended parties. Beth was always attending the parties with them and mainly hosted some of them, hence why we're on our way to her house.

Things started escalating mid year, last year. We had just started with semester exams, and with my dad's illness, accelerating, I had expected Mike to be by my side, but instead he would always find reason and excuse to leave me and hang out with Beth. He grew fond of Beth, too fond for my liking, actually, because whenever I would say something slightly negative about Beth, he would be quick to jump onto the rescue boat and defend her. That's when I knew. That's when I knew, he had moved on.

It wasn't long after that, maybe a few weeks, after our unspoken breakup, when my dad was finally laid to rest and I lost myself. James and Chelsea (whom I had been friends with since beginning of high school), would come and see me, but at that moment, I needed my best friend. I needed Mike.

In my mind, I think I had managed to convince myself that I was okay with him cheating on me and seeing Beth, as long as he was my friend. But everything inside of me broke the day he officially started dating Beth and I realised I had just lost my dad, my boyfriend and best friend, in the span of a month.

All the love I had for Mike, converted into hate, because my feelings weren't just going to fade. That energy had to be converted into something else.

James and Chelsea, including her boyfriend Josh, watched me drown in self pity, but they stood by my side and helped me channel all my anger into something useful.

Speaking of James. He's never made a comment about the situation between Beth, myself and Mike. I know he feels guilty, because Beth is his friend, but they aren't as close as they used to be and I've also never asked why they're still friends, because it honestly isn't my place to choose his friends for him. Although I would have unfriended her, if I was him. No shade.

On the other hand, Chelsea hates Beth. Sometimes I feel like she hates her more than I do. Which I'm honestly fine with.

"Took you long enough, I was already growing a beard," James says, climbing in the car.

"You don't even have pubic hair," I say at him.

"I'm not your chauffeur, James," Chelsea says then turns away from us, "well he's cute," Chelsea says.

We follow her gaze and we stare, as a cute guy climbs into a car packed just next to Sean's house and drives off.

"That's my new neighbour, Sean. Sexy as well and he smells good. You know how I am with my cologne."

We look at James and he raises his eyebrows. Chelsea reverses and we drive off as well.

"What," he says and continues, "I've already made my move, sad he's straight."

"You have a boyfriend, James," Chelsea comments like she doesn't have one herself.

"Does that mean I can't appreciate a beautiful human being?"

"He has a point," I chip in.

"You can have him, Leya," James says.

"Oh wow thanks, James."

"You do need a boyfriend," he looks at Chelsea, " am I wrong, Chelsea?"

Chelsea, chuckles and mumbles a nope as she stops at a stop sign.

I sigh, "My life isn't that sad guys, I don't need a boyfriend."

Yeah I know. They are tired of hearing me talk about how happy my life was with Mike and how beyond miserable it is now. It really is miserable so maybe if I just voice it out and put it into the universe that my life isn't that bad, it'll actually get better.

Chelsea parks near the other cars, just one house from Beth's house.

"Okay, we're here. I wonder what that witch has install for us today," she says with a serious face.

We exit the car and follow the music, nearing her house step by step. I can hear the music getting louder and surprisingly it's not deafening.

I spot Beth by the main entrance greeting everyone who's entering with a wide smile. Mike has his arm around her shoulders and smiling here and there.

"Jammy!"

Beth comes running towards us and jumps onto James, which earns her glares from myself and Chelsea.

I look at Mike and we make eye contact so he throws me a tight lipped smile, which i reciprocate. On the side, Beth is all over James, intentionally trying to annoy me. I'll be fair to admit, it annoys me a little.

After hours of giggling and fake laughing, Beth turns around and smiles at us, finally acknowledging our presence, so we also flash her a fake smile.

"Well thank you guys for coming, I'm so happy you could come," she says.

"Oh my word." I scoff.

"Right, Mike?"

Beth elbows him as she stands next to him again. He smiles and nods at us before putting his arm around Beth again.

Chelsea walks off into the house and James follows, right on her tail. I look at Mike and Beth again before following Chelsea and James into the house.

As I step inside the house I spot a few kids from my school, mainly Mike's friends, including his now close friend Kayla. Deciding that they won't be able to hold any conversation i would be interested in, I walk towards the kitchen and open the cooler to grab some ice.

"Here."

I turn around and see Chelsea holding a slushie in one hand and another in the other.

"Where the hell did you get a slushie?" I ask her already taking a sip.

"Outside. Machine and everything."

"Wow," I mutter enjoying the slushie, "there's so much alcohol in this."

The alcohol hits me and Chelsea smiles and nodes.We make our way outside and hop onto a bench near the barbeque grill. People are jumping into the pool, getting pushed in and just enjoying themselves before school starts.

"She does know that throwing a party every week doesn't make more people like her, right."

"I don't think she knows much," I say, "you got to give it to her though she is trying."

"Excuse me!" Chelsea screams.

"I said trying, chill dude."

We sip our slushies and laugh as we make a few comments about everyone around us, thanks to the strong dose of alcohol Chelsea poured into our slushies.

"Excuse me, while I go talk to someone who doesn't posses any balls."

Chelsea says giggling as she holds her phone and it flashes "Josh".

She stands up and walks away from the pool from all the screaming and laughing, staggering a little bit. How much alcohol did she put in these slushies?

I pull my phone out of my back pocket and reply to my mom's messages.

"Hey."

I'm interrupted from my typing and my head snaps up.

"Mind if I sit?"

I take a a deep breath in and sigh, "Sure."

I schooch over, creating just enough space for him to seat and enough to ensure his safety.

"What's up?" He asks.

I sit with my legs crossed I look at him noticing that he's rubbing his hands together. Something he does when he is nervous.

"What do you need, Mike?"

He looks at me hesitantly before replying, "how are you holding up?"

I avert my eyes to the people jumping into the pool finding the splashes peaceful before looking at him again.

"You're kind of a few months too late with that question," I chuckle.

"Yeah that's on me."

We sit in silence for a while, not looking at each other. He starts rubbing his hands together and clears his throat.

"I'm sorry."

Damn right. It's about time, he grew some balls and apologised.

"For not being there, you know. It's a new year and I just wanted to make amends. You are like my best friend and-"

"Were." I cut him off, "were your best friend. And I wasn't like your best friend, Mike. I was your best friend."

He looks at me then looks down at his feet and continues, "I just wanted to say I'm sorry."

When he's done, I start laughing. Maybe it's the wine in me, but I've never had to sit through such bullshit ever before.

"You know, technically we're still dating," I say and he looks at me confused, "I mean you never bothered to actually break up with me. You just started dating Beth and that's how I learnt that you never actually cared for me. I had known you for 7 years and we had been friends for the 7 years, but you still treated me like a summer fling you could ghost. You're only coming to talk to me now for the first time, because of a new year resolution."

Mike doesn't say anything and he doesn't even look up to look at me. If he won't talk, I will. I've waited too long for this.

"I'm not stupid, you know. Mike. You're only apologising because after this year, everyone will scatter off to university and go scared of losing all your friends, especially Beth? So now you're trying trying to mend the broken ones, because deep down you know I'll always be there?" I ask him, "I mean it's Beth, I wouldn't be surprised if she left you on graduation day." I chuckle.

Mike repositions himself on the bench, so he's looking at me now. His eyes are red and he looks hurt. Well karma is a bitch.

"You know, when my dad died, I think I had actually moved on from you. I didn't feel the same for you, then cause I knew you were with Beth and there was nothing I could do about it but move, but you know what. I wanted my best friend back. I needed you as my best friend," I wipe the tear that managed to roll down my cheek, "but I had lost you. I had lost my best friend and my dad at the same time and that broke my fucking heart dude. You didn't even offer your condolences Mike and that man treated you like his own son and you know that."

"I messed up, I know. I'm really sorry," he finally says.

"You did," I chuckle, "but you also opened my eyes. I really can't hold it against you if you weren't using your big head to think, so thank you for the apology, i don't accept it, but thank you for trying. We should just go our separate ways and return to how things are. It works best."

"Mike!"

I look up and chuckle, "Your girlfriend is calling you,"

Beth makes her way towards us and he stands up, giving me a sympathetic nod. I hate that. I hate that he has to look at me with a pitiful face like him leaving me turned me into some charity case. I also hate how he seems to have only started caring about me now, like he only realised now that I have been hurting.

For all I care he can shove his little excuse of an apology where the sun doesn't shine.

-♡-

I enter the kitchen again and pour some coke from a can for myself to cool off. After, I walk into the lounge where some of the kids are conversing. I notice James laughing and talking to some of the other kids in the room so I turn around and decide to go back outside and look for Chelsea. Hopefully she's done with her phone call.

When I find her she's still on her phone call, so i wait for her to finish so I scan the scene in front of me.

"Hey."

I stop the guy from earlier, that we saw near James' house.

"Sorry, you're the new guy right?" I ask him.

"Uh, yeah, Sean"

He extends his hand and I shake it. I already know his name, but it didn't hurt anyone, hearing it from him.

"Leya." I smile.

"This is Caitlin."

He motions to the girl next to him and I smile.

"I saw you earlier today, by the Davids', " I say and he gives me a questioning look, "the house I assume you moved into, on Barnard Street."

"Oh, yeah, yeah, we just moved there."

"Yeah, well just thought of saying you know welcome to Westshore," I wave my arms around excitedly.

Someone come save me.

"Thanks, but we just changed houses. Been here for 4 years now," he responds.

"Oh."

I take a sip of my coke and we continue standing there awkardly but thanks to Chelsea's accuracy she comes and saves the day.

"Made new friends huh," she says as she hugs me from the back.

"Sean, Caitlin." I introduce them.

"I'm Chelsea, her hot significant other."

Chelsea says and smiles like it's the most common thing ever to say.

"Well nice meeting you Chelsea, her hot significant other."

He gives a curt nod to Chelsea, turns around and we're left staring at their retriving figures.

"He's so dreamy." Chelsea says once we stop staring at them.

"You've mentioned."

I hook my arm with hers and we make our way to into the house once again.

"Did you see the resting bitch face on that Cathy chick."

"Cailtin." I correct her.

She stops and looks at me.

"Leya," she puts her hands on my shoulders in the process, "correct me if I'm wrong, but i don't give a fuck."