What is your opinion?
Great start!
"I loved the way you wrote this story. It was easy to recognise the characters, and it was a new plot I hadn't read ever (as in, it was different to any other, without any cliches as far as I'd read.) The dialogue was good; your characters seemed realistic. I also enjoyed the action and the setting. Your only problem here is that you have to cut some unnecessary words out. Occasionally, you also had a few errors. For example, you once forgot the second pair of speech marks. Other than that, this was well written and interesting to read. Nice!"
When the sky caught fire
"I'll be honest and say that this really isn't my type of book to read. Having said that I was blown away by the concept. I really liked what I read so far. It was interesting to read about Ross and his family and how the government began to burn books, change history and of course how Ross joins the rebellion. It will be interesting to see where this books goes. I can't say much about this as it is not a finished book but the idea here is a good one and something that gets people thinking especially in this climate in time. Overall, this is something interesting to read."
When the Sky Caught Fire
"The story is interesting, the characters clear and distinct and the action dramatic. Some of the characters rise from the page and take on a reality which makes them appealing to the reader. These are very positive qualities in your novel and is no mean achievement. The overall context of the tale doesn't always convince but it could be improved dramatically by creating a very clear 'time and place' for the action. A really tight re-draft would make a huge difference. I congratulate the author on her achievement thus far and wish her success in taking the novel forward."
Hi how are you?
"I noticed that your book is already a long time in inkitt and you have few readers reading. tries to make a general revision in his writing and in the framing of the story in general because from the beginning when reading his book the reader gets tired. I got tired from the second paragraph of the first chapter, it's a lot: he, he, he. I felt a certain blockage on her part in telling the story. History has great potential and if you work on it you will see that you will have many readers interested.It's a tiring reading. I hope I have helped you, I will always be available to continue reading your stories."
Fun beginning!
"This was a really fun read! I found the voice in the story very amusing and Ross even more so. He makes for a likable protagonist. I also liked the way that you set up the government and its attempts to keep control of the country. The book-burning was especially interesting to me. I also liked some of the names that you used -- Sisterland and....what was the other one.... Abnormalities? I can't remember now. But I remember liking it! I would definitely say that you should try and work on more showing and less telling. I never really got much of a sense of setting in this story, and I think that if you added more setting it would really help to make this even more believable. I also think that you could try and slow down. It felt like you were kind of rushing from one event to the other. I would have liked to have dwelt in some of the places for a longer period of time with vivid details and visceral images - especially with the parents' death scene in the first chapter. I would also move all the telling about the government out of the first scene. That first scene with the firefight should just grab the leader's attention without the need for exposition. I would add that backstory into the next scene once you've already snagged your reader. However, I really enjoyed reading it. All in all, this is a really good start, and I'm eager to see where it goes! Good work!"
Strong Start
"The world you've created here is powerful, dark and eerily prophetic. It's a poignant look at what a dystopian America can look like and how far off we are from it. I love the social commentary and message you're providing here. Very strong start. I also agree with Caitlin that some more detail in your scenery would help out a lot here. You've got a few scenes that move to fast and catch the reader off guard. But other than that, your characters are genuinely good, and you have a solid vision for where you want your story to go. I look forward to seeing the finished product."
