Stabbed Pages

After loving him so much, I couldn’t stop completely,

Because love doesn’t end with a period, darling it ends with three.

-i still love you

When words fall short for expressing our love,

Poets like me are bent on words.

-my love for you inks a million pages

I love nothing. I want nothing. I need nothing. Will you be my nothing?

-will u be my nothing?

As the sun set and the sky turned pink, ravens stood dauntingly on the chimney of my old, crumbling house. I stood by the window, looking outside. I always stared at the same direction, a fact my brother hadn’t failed to notice. When he asked me why that was, I told him that I changed direction with the wind. He didn’t argue.

But truth is, even when a forest lies on the other side, full of beautiful creatures, your house is still what I am looking at.

-I am always looking for you

You think I am into you, so you stop talking to me? Wow… if that’s how you treat your secret admirers, no wonder they keep it a secret.

-I’m so into you

I need a bit of inspiration right now. Please tell me if you guys see my crush anywhere.

-hear hear

“Why him?” you asked me, sipping on some hot chocolate. “I don’t know.” I replied, looking for a reason and finding a hundred. But it was by far over now, even before the start, But I guess that’s just how some love stories end.

-because some love stories end before the beginning

I just hope that someday you can give me,

The love that I deserve.

A heart that’s been broken, stabbed, cheated and burnt,

And yet, somehow it still loves.

-my heartbreak speaks for itself

you were just the beginning of yet another lie,

just another shiny thing that had caught my eye.

and once it did, i couldn’t take it off,

and now my friends say that, darling, i’m in love.

is it true? am i really in love with someone like you?

ball and chains, handcuffs, doors barred,

heart and soul, darling, i’m yours.

and when the water’s too high to swim,

or the fire burns your skin,

when the ice gives you chills,

i’ll be there, i’ll be there, i will.

and when the world starts breaking apart,

when the apocalypse hits us hard;

will you join me on the rooftop to admire the view?

-’cause at the end of the world i’ll be waiting for you.

i will, will you? i will, but will you?

-well, will you?

wish i could say that we were meant to be,

that it was written in the stars, our destiny,

that we crossed paths and our fates were sealed,

and when the stars would align,

it would be you and me.

it’s just that i don’t believe in fairy tales,

or God as an excuse,

don’t believe in all that fucking bullshit,

nor things too good to be true.

-too good to be true

you were every single page of my shabby diary, ’cause darling i was a poet, and you my poetry. you were every ink drop,that felt its way down my wrists, the words that i said were you, your name set on my lips. you were every single breath that i had ever inhaled, you were the words on my heart, embedded- or rather-impaled. you were my everything, until you became my nothing.

-everything to nothing

your name reminds me of sleepless nights,

many a poems still hidden inside,

the scars on my hand that spell your name,

the tears i shed into the moonlight.

your name means so much to me,

so how did just a few letters suffice?

-your name

I know that I should either love him or not. It should be either black or white. But I’m too afraid of doing black, and I simply cannot do white… so my love comes in grey.

-loving you in greys

I’d done away with almost everything,

The sunny morning memories.

Everything to do with him,

All except the poetry.

My friends, they asked why that was,

If I’d still not gotten over his loss.

If deep down inside I still loved him,

And this was just a break, a pause.

How do I tell them that I didn’t want to waste,

So many tears, ink, pages of late.

That I kept them there so that next time,

I remember the pain when I want him to be mine.

-im over you

And then I saw him,

Standing right there;

And I forgot all my dialogues,

(To my utter despair).

My friends pointed and giggled,

But he didn’t feel their stare;

He didn’t even glance at me,

Like I wasn’t even there.

-like i wasnt even there

sometimes my heart goes out for a stroll, it leaves my body broken, eyes open and i’m alone. it climbs out of that broken shell of a body of mine, watches him quietly and gives away a smile. it bites its bleeding lips and pushes its hair out of its eyes, and stays their much much longer, much longer than it likes. and finally, when it does return, it smiles softly at my mind’s concern, when my mind asks it how he had been, it grins, knowing that even my mind loves him.

- even my mind loves him

They tell me to follow my heart, but I choose my brain instead, Because my heart will either lead into your arms or the arms of Death.

-heart vs brain

I don’t want a perfect life. I want twists and turns and sharp, jagged edges. Sharp, jagged edges that just happened to fit perfectly into yours.

-perfect

if you ever need a damaged soul, carve your name on mine and have it; if you ever need a shattered mind, break my crystal one and take it; if you ever need a broken heart, you already broke mine and it’s already yours, so you might as well just use it.

-if you ever need

Remember that morning , when we were sitting by the sea, Staring at the sun rise, corals beneath? When I said, “There’s never been a better view.” I wasn’t talking about the sea, I was talking about you.

-you

When my world starts falling to pieces- can I call you? Will you pick up? Will you come over?- or can I come over? Or maybe we could meet up somewhere? Point is- will you be there? Will you be there when the apocalypse hits?- so that we can admire the view together?

-will you be there when the apocalypse hits?

Your absence is more obstinate than it was before, It prods and pokes and daunts me, every minute or so; Every night it haunts me, every day it’s right there, And I can’t help but feel the absence of you in the air.

-your absence

I smile every time I remember you, and remember you every time I smile; So maybe give or take a few, but I still remember you a million times in a while. I remember your existence every moment of my life, When I need a shoulder to cry on, someone to dry my eyes; I remember of your existence, every time I laugh or smile, For no particular reason, I just remember you once in a while.

-remember you

I love myself beyond all sense and reason, love myself irrationally, Even if I destroyed myself, I’d wake up the next day and still love me.

-i love me too

My eyes are on portrait mode, Everything is a blur; Everything, except for, The most wonderful girl.

-wonderful girl