Wish I never

It was Saturday and she knew there was a lot of things a girl her age could be doing; Jenna could be hanging with her friends at the mall, or she could stay at home making jewelry. She could have even asked to work overtime so she could hang out with Braylen Harvey. Basically, Jenna McCoy could have been out having a life but no it was too late for her to do any of those things. She knew that when bright and early her mother got to her first, waking her up with the roosters. Before the sun.

"Honey, I thought it would be the best thing if we went out today." She plopped on the side of Jenna's bed as she said it shaking her daughter from sleep blabbering the whole time.

Jenna sat up rubbing the last of sleep out her eyes trying to savor the last bit of sweetness she had behind her eyelids. It had been lovely and sweet dream and right before it had its wonderful ending her Mom burst through with her bright idea.

Janelle wanting to leave the house should have thrilled her.

She hadn’t been anywhere in so long; it had been two years since the divorce and Janelle still seemed a bit dazed by it. So instead of rolling her eyes as she sat up in bed, Jenna smiled prepared to do whatever it was that her mom wanted. “Really Mom?” Jenna yarned rubbing her eyes again.

Janelle nodded bravely. The firm set of her shoulders told Jenna she had to have bullied herself into leaving the house, she wouldn’t let her back off now.

“Sure Mom, what did you have in mind?”

Her response was enthusiastic, forced but it was there. For a moment she even looked like the Mom Jenna once knew. “I was reading this magazine and it said the best way to get over the past-” shadows darken her face but they were quickly gone all for Jenna’s sake. She tried to hide her pain but Jenna knew all this had to be killing her.

“The best way to get over the past?” Jenna prompted

Excitement sparked again. “Is to redecorate.”

Oh no. Jenna thought but kept her smile fixed in place.

“Doesn't that sound fun honey?”

Shoot. Me. Now. Jenna thought. The queen of unfinished projects wanted to make a project of their home, or at least it use to be there home. Lately it seemed more and more like just a house with shadows of it’s occupants living in it.

Maybe this is what she needs. Jenna thought. Her mom seemed happy, her face was bursting with excitement her grey eyes had that spark again. It could work. This could be the final push she needed to get over Dad-

“Honey-”

“I think it’s a great idea mom.” Jenna smiled up at her mom.

Her mother’s smile blossomed and Jenna knew the walls could fall down around them and the roof could cave in on their heads. She knew that she had chosen the right thing.

“Great, wonderful!" The excitement was barely contained.

It won’t be like those other times. It won’t be like those other projects. Jenna chanted.

“Is that what you wanted to do today?” Her mother’s head bounced. “I saw this hardware store up on Main road. It seems like a good of place as any to start.”

Fighting down her rising panic, she kept calm, she would be cool. She didn’t have the heart to tell Mom that the best thing to do first was flip through magazines and cop a feel for what they, she, wanted. Mom did tend to be a nose dive right in type of woman. Over the years, especially the last two she had learn to channel her mothers energy. But this, Jenna didn’t know how she was going to do it.

“Sure Mom that sounds great.”

Her mom’s smile bloomed out again, it had been dwindling with the silence of her daughter. Now that she had Jenna’s approval everything was fine and dandy.

“Doesn’t it though.” Mom said suddenly she stood and was at Jenna’s door. “Why don’t you get dressed, we can get out and beat the traffic if we’re lucky.”

She didn’t say anything, just nodded. She nodded back and was gone. If she was hearing right she was whistling while walking through the hallway.

Jenna waited a full ten seconds before falling back into her bed turning her head to look at the clock. 7:00 am. No sixteen year old girl deserved this. Ever.

Jenna would bet the jade earrings she had made last night her mom had woken up hours before strolling in here, plopping on her bed and suggesting this idea of remodeling.

It won’t be that bad. Jenna thought before praying that it wouldn’t be that bad. “It won’t be that bad.” she rolled out of bed before the idea of going back to sleep became too tempting. “It won’t be that bad.” she chanted to her empty room before bustling about to get dressed.