Chapter 1
Austyn Pov
The monsters we fear aren’t the ones under our beds.
They’re the ones inside us.
Mine has been slowly killing me.
Day by day.
Hour by hour.
Minute by minute.
Monsters like mine don’t just appear out of nowhere.
They’re created.
Mine started three years ago.
And it hasn’t left me alone since.
It haunts my dreams every night.
Sometimes, I get lucky. Sometimes I don’t dream at all.
But most nights?
I’m trapped in it.
Reliving it.
Over and over again.
I pull my blanket over me and close my eyes, bracing myself for another night of it.
“Austyn!” my mom yells. “Come down now!”
I groan, dropping my head back against the pillow.
So much for sleep.
“Coming!” I yell back.
I get out of bed and run out my room and down the stairs. My feet stumble as I approach the last set of steps. My choice of running was a diaster waiting to happen.
I close my eyes in preparation for the impact my face was about to have with the floor. Before my favecan collide with the floor, two arms wrap around my waist.
Opening my eyes, i take a small look at my rescuer, and immediately regret it.
Derek Black.
My best friend. Not.
He’s not even my friend at all. I despise him.
I only know him because of our stupid parents. They met when my parents took a vacation to Italy. Apparently they went to this random party and just met Derek’s parents and they all instantly became friends. Not long after my parents went back to the States, the Blacks moved to the States.
Unfortunately that means I've known Derek my entire life. Literally. He was there the day I was born. Once our parents found out I was a girl in the womb, they couldn’t stop talking about how one day Derek and I would grow up together be such great best friends and hopefully marry each other. They still can’t stop talking about it.
The thing is, only one of us kids loves that idea, and it wasn't me.
For as long as I can remember, I've never been left alone by Derek. I’ve only ever been by myself when Derek had to go home due to his parent's orders.
I honestly didn't mind him being around me until I got to pre-k. That's when I started to hate Derek. Every time a boy would come to talk to me, he would push them away and tell them to leave me alone when they never did anything but approach me.
My life has been a living hell ever since then. His actions have only gotten worse over the years. I don't know what his problem is either.
I can't do anything without him right beside me. And I mean, I cannot do anything at all.
If I need to use the restroom, Derek will follow me and stand outside the door until I'm done. Whenever I ask why he does it, he just shrugs his shoulders.
I seriously wish he would leave me alone for the rest of my life. Oh, and get this, when I ask him to leave me alone and go home and don't bother me anymore, he throws the biggest tantrum and goes and tells my mom to get me into trouble. And it works, too, because I'll get grounded for two weeks each time, leaving me to have more time with the devil himself.
I pushed myself out of his arms, giving Derek a look of disgust. A smirk plastered across his stupid face. I wonder if he thinks he's all that and a box of chocolates. That's one box of chocolates that I wouldn't eat.
I look over at mom only to see her smiling and shaking her head at Dereks and my interaction.
I rolled my eyes. I hate how much she loves him. I hate Derek so much.
"What do you want?" I asked. My voice deadpanned as can be.
Mom gave me one of her "seriously" looks and rolled her eyes. She walks towards the kitchen, away from Derek and me, she waved goodbye, leaving me with the one person I hate being around.
Why does my mother hate me so much to leave me with him?
Slowly turning towards Derek, I silently pray and hope that he will leave my house to spare me this one time.
Unfortunately, my prayers are not answered.
Amusement danced through his eyes as he watched me.
Suddenly I remember something.
Derek is supposed to be leaving today. He's going to Italy to start working on his family business.
I'm about to be free of this controlling moron.
"Don't you have a flight to catch?"
"Yes, I do. But I came here to tell you goodby-" Derek said, rolling his eyes.
Me being me, I start squealing and jumping up and down happily.
"Okay, goodbye! Have a fantastic flight to Italy!" I said as I started to try to push him out the door. My tiny self is trying to push away a human being that’s taller than me is like I was driving a car in park. He literally wouldn't budge.
I guessed he got tired of me trying to push him towards the door because he put both hands on my shoulders and forced me to look at him.
He was giving me this annoyed, stern look.
Finally, he lets go of me, walks toward the couch, and sits on it. He pats the spot beside him and gives me this look telling me to sit beside him.
Like hell, I'll sit beside him.
I walked over to the armchair across from the couch and placed my butt on it. The look he gave me was excellent. Infuriation across his stupid ugly face is satisfaction for me.
"We need to talk." He crosses his arms, rolling his eyes at me.
I raised my eyebrows at him. What do we need to talk about?
“I’m giving you a set of rules to follow,” Derek said, his voice firm—like he’d practiced this. “If you follow them, you’ll be rewarded.”
I frowned. “Exc—”
“I’m not done.”
I snapped my mouth shut, glaring at him. Since when did he think he could talk to me like that?
“If you don’t follow them,” he went on, “there will be consequences.”
My stomach dropped. “Derek, you’re being—”
“Rule one,” he cut in quickly, like he didn’t want to lose his nerve. “You don’t talk to other boys. I’m the only one you talk to. Like that.”
I blinked at him. “What?”
“Rule two: you don’t date anyone. You don’t fall in love either. You… you wait.” His jaw tightened. “For me.”
My lips parted in disbelief.
“Rule three: stay innocent. Don’t… don’t do anything weird or gross.” He avoided my eyes for a second, then forced himself to look back at me.
Okay. Now I knew he had lost his mind.
“Rule four: your friends can only be me—and girls. No guys.”
“You cannot be serious right now.”
“And rule five…” His voice dropped, more certain this time. “You don’t forget me. Or these rules. Ever.”
The air between us felt strange. Heavy.
“I’ll be back,” he said. “And when I am… you better have listened.”
I stared at him, my heart pounding, my brain trying to catch up.
What in the world?
Was he actually serious?
