Good short horror read

"The description is excellent, intriguing, spooky, doesn't give too much away, and make the reader wonder what ’it’ is. You don't need to put (inner thoughts), instead weave it into the story by saying he thought after his thought in italic, and combined the two lines into one paragraph. Your description of the house is clear, but is it a house or a cabin? I would ditch the brackets, and add more detail to the build up to the vacuum turning on. You need to make sure you start a new line for a new speaker. The cliff hanger at the end of the first chapter was good but I think you should build up the suspense more. I love that he actually armed himself! He did something sensible! The ending was unexpected, but it was rushed. The story would benefit from more detail. It is a good horror read though. "