Strong Beginning

"I found the Prologue interesting; what lost me was Chapter One. As many up-and-coming writers do, the author dumped so much info into that first Chapter...there were a dozen moments, if not more, where as the reader I was being Told what had happened, incredibly important moments of the MC's life, instead of being Shown. My desire is to be drawn into a story, to feel like I'm watching events unfold, but instead I felt like the author was telling me the story across a coffeeshop table. But the technical skills were pretty good (one tense change and one misused word in all that I saw) and the passion was clear! Please keep writing!"