A Kinky Conspiracy

"Great work Tremour! You do a great job of developing the people as the chapters go on, slowly giving each character more and more background while also connecting them to each other. It's like a spider's web of characters! Moreover, the different POVs you have going really adds to the story, especially the Cynthia chapter. You spent so much time crafting this specific image of Cassie, then threaten to break it apart with the Aunt's perspective. Utterly captivating! As an aside, I LOVE your writing style! It's very punchy, and the reader is pulled into the story as they read each line of thought. In terms of some improvements, there are a few chapters where grammatical edits would clarify the story more, not to mention make an easier read. the most memorable mistake is in Cynthia's chapter, where you (I think) meant to say "Not only the men wanted her, women did too." But instead you wrote "Men didn't want her. Women did too." Or something along those lines. Overall, great story! I can't wait to see where you go with Cassie's character! and how the other characters react..."