Kill Your Darlings

THE MUSIC RINGED loudly in my ears. Whenever the time came for the beat to drop, the ground below me—that I could barely see since I was trying to keep my head up above the others—would shudder.

My hands were trembling, my vision was clouded and could feel my eyes twitching into thin lines from time to time trying to see through the darkness. Everything seemed to be drifting in slow motion just like in the movies: body twisting, turning, fast dancing and mischievous glares shot across the room.

Where on earth was Minerva?

I scanned around for her little figure through the dark. The steamy crowd of people kept on dancing as if they belonged to the music, till they would eventually drop tired on the ground, their smell was driving me insane.

I hated that place, I couldn't stand being there any moment longer but the music sounded so good it was almost impossible for me to leave.

I couldn't leave without Minerva.

I shouldn't have followed her but the idea of going to a club sounded exciting and if the music in my ears: whenever I wore earphones sounded wondrous, what could it, in a place like that: with huge speakers and a big crowd of strangers, have sounded like?

Well, the answer was right in front of me.

I turned around still searching for any signs of Minerva. I felt eyes on me before I could even blink in an attempt to clear my blurred vision, I had a feeling like I knew exactly who it was.

"Searching for someone, sweetheart?" His voice was soothing. Their voice sounded like satin brushing against my skin, it sounded expensive and their French accent just enhanced the sound of its luxuriousness.

His long black hair faintly smelled of coal, overpowering the strong smell of perfume he wore as his body leaned into me. I raised my head towards his, looking into his eyes through my eyelashes, they were of a familiar sparkling gunmetal blue; his skin, even though it was slightly darkened by the dimmed lights in the club, looked as pale as bleach and it was incredibly clear and smooth. He was gorgeous.

He reflected my desires, he wasn't like any other person. A dhampir perhaps? What did I know about vampires? How did I even know they existed?

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

His breed had been hunted down through centuries, he wasn't safe anywhere, even worse near me.

His human scent overpowered the amount of perfume he wore, it started to drive me crazy and the sound of his blood rushing through his veins made me instinctively shut my eyes, trying to regulate my breathing, my hands started to shiver once more.

Something grabbed my naked arm pulling me away from the guy, so, as a response, I quickly looked behind me just to see Minerva's hand around my arm.

"She's with me, leave before I kill you!" She barked at the guy and as I looked back at him, he held a grin on his lips.

"I wasn't doing anything in particular."

"Well, good for you, now we're leaving."

She pulled me away from him, dragging me away with her inside the crowd of strangers, I looked back to the guy, letting myself go along with her pulls.

My vision was getting worse, I could still sense whatever was happening around me: the pushing, the touching and for a moment I felt soft kisses on my cheeks by women I bumped into.

"You're still here?" Minerva stopped in her tracks causing me to stumble and take a few steps forward.

"Not my fault, there are stairs up there." The guy pointed towards his left and I squinted my eyes and looked in the direction he pointed at to see a large set of stairs running across the club.

"At this point, you're just stalking us."

The attitude Minerva had was far more than impressive, she stepped forward tilting her head as she looked up at the guy, he faked a smiled looking down and into her eyes.

"I'm worried about your friend, little one," he spoke nodding towards my direction, he had a gentler smile on his lips once his eyes met mine and something about them made me shyly smile back.

"I'm fine, "I bluntly answered, not wanting to feed his wicked ego, with my other free hand I, embarrassed, brushed my hand across my arm and looked down.

The music got louder, Minerva's voice was in the background dimming away every second that passed by.

I knew that if I looked at him I would have lost all my senses, I would have driven out of control, I wouldn't have been able to take my eyes off him.

Minerva's voice snapped me back down to earth: "Lauv, you have a lot of explaining to do."

I looked at her annoyed expression and questioned her with my eyes, she quickly took in a deep breath letting go of her hand in mine, then took a step closer keeping me away from what was in front of me.

"Please, tell me you know who that guy is."

I let go of the breath I held and looked at her confused, passing my tongue along my lips trying to take little breaths at a time, I shook my head in confusion. "I haven't been out for a long time, its hard for me to remember faces," I whispered.

Minevra's narrowed her eyes nodding at every word I said with her lips pressed into a thin line and then she parted her lips and whispered while she tucked her hair behind her ear: "it might be likely you've forgotten who you might be, so it's better I do all the talking."

"My name's Victor," he introduced himself reaching his hand forward; Minerva took a couple of steps backwards as if that was her first time seeing a guy in her life, I noticed her and swallowed hard. She must have caught the smell of his human scent.

"Maybe he just wants to dance," I whispered as I leaned forwards into her ear when I retreated she looked at me with an intrigued look on her face.

"Then I say you must, are you sure though?"

"You don't look well Lauv but it's up to you, I'm going to grab a few drinks and I'll be right back and if you don't want to dance with him just walk over to me and we'll get going," she sighed right after looking at me with glimmering eyes.

She was long gone before I could bring myself to count how many times I had stepped on his foot, taking under my grey heels, his polished shoes. Everything was spinning way too fast for me to concentrate on the fact that I was dancing with him.

I could have thrown up any moment then, one thing for sure my heart was thumping loudly in my chest, my hands were a sweating shaking cold mess and I would often shut my eyes close due to the embarrassment I had created for myself and how uncomfortable his human scent made me feel.

Still, he smiled brightly as we both moved our bodies along with the flow of the music.

He gazed at me as if he thought his perfume could overpower his mortal essence.

"You can come closer, I don't bite."

I do though and once I do, it'll be less likely of me to stop.

I took a few steps closer to him and Victor grabbed my hands, his fingertips sent electricity through me, once again I felt like whatever was going on wasn't meant to last, once again I felt that urge to leave before he left me, once again.

I remembered him and remembered why he left.

Victor took the initiative and walked a few inches closer and that's when everything around us started to go in an even slower motion: the pulsing of my lips as I slowly brought my head to the side to lay it on his chest, letting him sway my body from my side to side.

I used to love things like that, the pressure of a warm hand at my back and the feeling of my feet gliding along the floor like I wasn't able to take over my own body; that time that feeling was different, it was a mix between greed and thirst.

That time it was way different. I could hear his blood rushing through his veins, the beating of his heart and his luring aroma, the more I smelt the more I felt the need to push him away from me.

I wasn't human, that's what I was and I hated it.

"Why can't you stop running back to me once you leave?" -I asked leaning backwards gazing at him- "there's something about this time we meet again, that's telling me I need to do everything in me to protect you." I placed both of my hands onto his face, his skin felt smooth and soft as it looked, his long curls felt onto my fingers.

"Lauv!" I knew it was Alexandre's voice shouting my name through the crowd, two strong arms wrapped around me and pulled me back, instinctively my lips curved into a smile.

I felt Alexander's hands shifting from my waist to my shoulders, he turned me to him- not letting me get the chance to look into his amber eyes- and pressed me against his chest, his familiar expensive perfume invaded my nostrils and the smile on my lips grew.

"Can't you see I'm busy Alex?"

I jokingly pushed him away, looking up into his eyes, the corners of his mouth turned as he gave me a challenging look to then bite his lower lip.

"You look paler. How's Minerva been treating you since I've left, she's must have been brainwashing you, you look so docile," he said, holding the back of my head and looking deep into my eyes with furrowed eyebrows.

"I'm doing good and as I said I'm busy."

I faked a laugh.

"You're pretty busy and he's cute." He winked and nodded his head to his right.

I rolled my eyes pursing my lips but my lips were still curved into a smile and asked him: "Say whatever you want, Alex but have you seen Minerva?"

"Sadly no. So she's here too? Suddenly showing you the outside world but the real question is how the hell did she convince you to come out of that massive crib of yours?" he asked, sounding as surprised as ever.

I patted his shoulder and said: "I don't know how she did that but you know Erva, she always gets what she wants, anyways I need to know where she is because she's taking too long, I'll see you another day."

"What about your little date?" Alexander shouted behind me, trying to overpower the music.

I quickly turned around and shrugged my shoulders, Alexander looked at me exhausted, the smile on his lips slowly faded away as he pressed his lips together.