our last goodbyes

A soothing, gentle voice hummed a short tune, echoing throughout the empty field of white daisies. It had no direction, no centre, or end; it just was. The voice was unrecognisable yet so comforting and familiar. One would think it was all merely in your head, none of it was real. But this felt so real. So elegant, ecstatic and genuine. I had no thought to try and locate the owner of the voice. I was all alone. In a field of long grasses and daisies for miles. No sign of anyone else. Just the lingering voice of a mystery waiting to be discovered. I don’t know how long I had been running for.

It was endless.

Timeless.

Until I found a strong, oak tree with a small swing tied to one of its many branches. I was only a few feet away it seemed. But as I tried to near the tree, it only stayed the same. Seeming as though I weren’t moving at all. I stopped. A dark-haired boy came out from behind the trunk. He saw me. He smiled. Waved. I tried to wave back but soon realised it was no use. I couldn’t move. His smile softened as I didn’t wave back. The boy sat against the trunk of the tree, leaning against it. I tried to move once more. It worked. I began running towards the boy and tree again. It came closer. It didn’t seem endless or timeless. I was getting closer. But the closer I got, the older the tree and the boy became. With every step I took, a year would pass.

I stepped closer.

They aged.

One.

Two.

Three.

Four.

Five.

Six.

Seven.

By the time I arrived almost a hundred steps later, it was dark and rainy; the dark-haired boy I had seen before was merely a skeleton. The now old tree was breaking and the leaves were dead. It looked abandoned. I was terrified. He was just there? He was a young boy. How could he have died so quickly? It’s all my fault…

There was no going back. I killed this boy. And there is no one to blame but myself.

“You did this. You’re a monster. Nothing more, nothing less,”

“What?” I looked up, tears in my eyes as I turned in all directions.

“My dear, Anastasya, do you not understand?”

“Who are you!?” I yelled. Guilt and sorrow burning through me.

“He had a family who loved him dearly, and you took that away,”

“I know, I know, I know! It’s my fault!” I cried, sinking down to my knees with my head in my hands.

“No one will forgive you,”

“You’re right, no one will,” I whispered; “I’m nothing but a monster,”

“A monster, indeed, but I can help you,”

“Who even are you?” I cried again, looking up into the sky; thinking that maybe it was coming from there.

“I am unable to reveal that, I’m afraid, but I can help you succeed,”

“Succeed?”

“Yes, Ana, I can help you succeed; but I need you to wake up first,”

“Wake up?”

“Yes, my dear, wake up,”

The voice faded as did my vision. Everything was replaced with a bright light. Then everything went black. My eyes fluttered open. The very same dark-haired boy was sitting by my side in a blue coloured room with his head down on my bed. Was he asleep? I moved slightly, trying not to wake him. But I failed.

“Oh my god,” He gaped, “Anastasya…”

“What?” I asked, purely confused.

“You’re actually awake!”