Chapter 1
Cael’s POV
“Brother, you don’t even know what it’s like. It can’t possibly be worth it.”
Cian grips my shoulder. With trembling jaw, he chokes out a ragged breath. “I’ve made my choice, Cael. There’s no going back. I’ll see you around.” Cian takes two steps back. He looks me in my eyes one last time, then falls back.
Every moment spent together, every laugh, every secret, every smile we shared has been inconsequential. Just like that, the only one I care about is gone. Forever. He chose them over me. My chest aches as sorrow consumes me and I can no longer take it. I drop to my knees and hold my head as the tears fall for the first time in my existence. Brother, my only friend. This is wrong, he doesn’t understand, he can’t possibly. A whispered promise escapes my quivering lips. “I’ll find you.”
Gray clouds cover the still dark sky. What a mess this has become. I shake my head and run my fingers through my hair. A whole year and nothing. Why can’t I find him? I’ve been everywhere he could possibly want to be and I’ve still come up empty-handed. I open the window and inhale the freshness of a world made clean again. I close my eyes as the cool air caresses my skin like a thousand feather caresses. I hum and take a deep breath. Today will be different, I can feel it in my very being.
I shrug on my clothing of jeans and a plain t-shirt and grab my baseball cap and notebook. I pull on my boots and jacket then ride out as the sun begins to rise.
After a month of being on Earth, I took over this shop from an old mechanic who was getting ready to retire. I learned all about cars from him, although he doesn’t know that. I stayed with him during that month, technically he was my assignment, but he was fine. It was my job to make sure everything went smoothly, which of course it did. Humans, I hate them on principal; they’re so weak, so useless. At least I found use from the previous shop owner. All I had to do was look.
What is a guardian angel doing owning a mechanic shop you may ask? Well, I’m hoping maybe one day 'He' will find his way to me, but I know that’s not likely.
I switch on the lights and slip into my coveralls, then throw my cap on backward and finish working on the timing chain for a Ford Bronco, allowing the day to pass.
“Hello? Anyone here?” A soft feminine voice calls out from the office. The lightning flashes and the thunder claps as the rain pours down on the tin roof of the brick building. The sun is hidden behind the dark clouds as I roll out from under another random vehicle. “Hello? I'm sorry to bother you, but I really need help." She continues her timid call. "My car won’t start and it’s pouring. Hello?” She rings the bell for service and I grunt in annoyance. Why did I ever buy the damned thing?
I drop my tools onto the table and grab a dirty towel to wipe away the grease. The floor creaks as I step up behind the counter. The woman’s hair is soaked along with her khaki-colored trench coat. Her body shakes and shivers as she shifts from foot to foot in front of the counter.
“Yeah, I hear you,” I mumble as I snatch the bell off the desk and hide it away then continue to wipe my blackened hands on the dirty towel. “I hate that thing." I say with a shake of my head.
"Sorry." She timidly whispers and it throws me off guard causing me to look up at her face before I remember myself and quickly look away.
"What can I do for you?” I droll.
The woman pulls her keys out of her handbag. “I’m sorry to trouble you. My car, it’s not working.”
You don’t say. Auto shops are great places to hang out on rainy days. Humans don't like it when you comment on their absurdity, but sometimes, I just can't help it. “I figured that part. Why else would you come to a mechanic?” The words slip out and I refrain from grunting at myself. She bites her lip, embarrassed. Come on, woman, I don’t have all day. I would like to get out of here at some point. I tilt my head to the side in frustration. “What is the car doing?”
The woman wipes a stray wet lock of hair out of her face. “Oh yeah. Um, it makes a clicking noise when I try to start it.”
I swipe the keys out of her hand and walk out from behind the desk. “Let’s take a look. Which car is yours?” God, I love the rain. It continues to shower from the dark gray sky. The cleansing feeling helps calm my frayed nerves. This downpour is a welcome reprieve.
The woman cowers under the torn awning as she points to the silver car a few spots away. “It’s the Corolla.”
The door is locked, which irritates the hell out of me, but I move on to check the ignition, Click, click, click, click. Perfect. I open the hood and remove the battery to take it back inside the shop. The woman follows me inside like a lost little puppy as I connect the battery to my machine. “I’m checking your battery.” I inform her so she doesn't bombard me with questions, a habit humans tend to have.
The woman leans against the counter. “Is that really all that’s wrong with it?”
I shrug my shoulder, fighting against rolling my eyes. “Hopefully. If not it’s the starter.”
She closes her eyes and runs her hand across her forehead. “Is it an expensive fix?”
I’m not one for small talk. I grab a water bottle and pop the lid off. “A new battery for a Corolla runs around ninety to two-hundred fifty dollars, depending on which one you choose. A starter is usually double that, plus labor.” I turn away and drink my water as she walks to the sitting area. Good, leave me the hell alone.
Her sniffling catches my attention, making me watch her over my shoulder. A tear slips down her cheek. She pulls a tissue from her bag and wipes her eyes. There's something about her that I can't quite pinpoint. I take the time to actually look at the woman, something I desperately try to avoid as much as possible. Her hair is naturally curly and dark brown. Her clothing looks like work attire for an office. Her makeup is light and clean-looking.
The woman lifts her eyes to mine and I inhale a breath, stunned. Her eyes are a silvery blue color, almost like ice. They’re clear, bright, and full of depth. Eyes full of pain and anguish. My mind is instantaneously transported to a scene from her memory; She’s sweeping hair from the kitchen floor. A man comes storming into the room with a backward baseball cap. He grabs her wrist and twists it backward. She cries out in pain as he screams obscenities in her face. He lets go of her arm only to pull her by the hair. He grabs the scissors off the table and cuts the length off of at her shoulder before throwing her to the floor.
My heart is pounding like a set of bongo drums as I close my eyes and retreat to the back room, removing myself from her memory and her presence. I hold my head and my leg bounces into my desk as the vision replays itself over again. My jaw clenches as I desperately try to shove the vision to the back of my mind. I know humans are awful, "Don’t get involved with them, Cael. She's not your assignment. Stay focused. They’re the reason, it’s their fault you’re here," I remind myself.
The machine beeps signifying the testing is finished. With a forced grunt I emerge from the back room to check the status of the battery. “You’re in luck, It’s just a dead battery.” Getting back to business, I pull up the options on the computer and turn the monitor toward the woman pointing out the third one on the list. “I recommend this one, it’s a good quality brand, it lasts longer, and you get more back on the core charge.”
Her voice is shaky as she asks. “How much is it?”
It is literally right there on the screen… Seriously? I point to the monitor. “One forty-nine ninety-five, plus tax. Since it’s a nice day, I’ll waive the labor costs. Minus the core charge of your current battery, you’re looking at one-o-one twenty four.”
She bites her lip, and timidly asks, “Do you have a payment plan or anything? I just got a new job. I haven’t been paid yet.” Oh, for the love of... I reflexively glance up at the woman’s eyes again. Ah, hell! I’m immediately transposed into another memory; The woman is standing at the side of the road, covered in sweat as a man looks under the hood of a car. He drinks from a water bottle then points at the back of the car. She begins to push the car as the man sits in the front seat. The car jump starts and the man drives away, leaving her on the deserted roadside.
I shake my head to clear the vision away. I know I have to help her. She’s telling the truth about not being able to afford it, she’s an honest soul and technically it's my job, even though I don't have a charge at the moment. “How much can you put down today?”
She clumsily thumbs through her wallet which contains a few ones, a five, and a ten. Eighteen dollars in cash. Are you kidding me right now? She shakes her head. “Never mind. I’ll just have to come back later on. I can’t afford anything right now.”
My conscience is kicking me, but I ignore it. Don’t get involved. Don’t get involved. She’s just a human, just like all the rest of them. I have to stay focused.
She wipes a stray tear away and turns to leave. Guilt weighs heavily on my heart and feel like I'm being pushed toward her until I can no longer fight it. I look behind me and see a quick flash of gold. Damn it. “Wait,” I begrudgingly say, stopping her in her tracks. She slowly turns back around waiting for me to speak. “What’s your name?”
She steps forward and extends her hand. “I’m Eva.”
There is no way in heaven or hell I am touching this woman. I hold up my still-blackened hands to show that I’m covered in grease. “I’m Cael. I can’t let you just leave your car here. We usually charge a fee for that. It adds up the longer the car sits.”
She swallows as she drops her hand and any remaining dignity as the tears flow freely. “I understand.”
I take a breath looking up toward the ceiling. For the love of all that is sacred and holy. Are you punishing me? I think to my maker. “When can you pay for the battery?”
Eva wipes at her cheek. “I get my first check next Friday. I was just hired at the bakery a few doors down, I start tomorrow.”
At least I know she can’t hide away. “I’ll install your battery for you now. Tomorrow, you bring me a chocolate cupcake.”
Eva lets out a breath of relief along with a few more tears. She nods like a bobble-head doll. “Absolutely. Thank you, thank you so much.” I give her a slight nod then grab the battery and take it outside. The rain continues to pour as I install the battery in record time. Eva watches on from beneath the shelter of the awning. I close the hood and start the car. Hallelujah. I get out of the car and leave Eva standing alone without another word.
"What am I doing? Now she’s going to come back. Idiot, Cael." I pull out my leather-bound book and make notes regarding the visions of Eva. I read them over, then re-read them. I sag in my chair as the clock ticks in time to my heartbeat. I toss my pen and close up my notebook. With a huff I force myself to get back to work.
Finally closing time. I scrub the grease from my hands, close up shop, and then head home. Home? This isn’t home. This is miserable. I shake my head at the idea of human existence. I close my eyes in frustration. Humans. I can't understand why he would give up everything to become one. I shake my head. "Focus, Cael." I get in the shower and wash the remaining grime away.
Every night since my arrival I’ve spent in bars, clubs, dance halls, strip clubs, or underground gambling rings. I’ve had to participate in the debauchery on more than one occasion, much to my dismay. I still can’t find the appeal. Tonight is no different, I'm determined to find him. I dress in my regular everyday clothes; a pair of light colored jeans and a black button-down shirt with the sleeves rolled up to my elbows. I throw on my black biker boots and jacket then head out.
I check two bars before heading into the strip club. The dancing girls hold no appeal for me, in fact, I detest them. For some reason, these nasty, dirty girls are always attracted to me and vie for my attention. I almost growl at the absurdity. To think any one of these loose harlots is relevant to me. Ridiculous. My eyes roam over the patrons with no success. Once again he’s not here and I come out empty-handed.
I can’t give up so I continue my search moving on to the next overly crowded club. The bouncers pay me no mind. I am larger and more appealing than most men and I am relatively calm. I tend to put the guys at ease and I get right in. Humans quickly forget me. The club is packed and people are bumping in to each other like cattle in a holding pen. They’re laughing and dancing, having a good time acting inappropriately. I slink back against the wall and look around. These worthless humans. With an uncontrolled eye roll, I continue around the perimeter of the horde, then back again, avoiding everyone I come across. He’s not here. My heart sinks to my stomach and I exit the building.
One more, just one more place. One more letdown before I call it a night. I head to an older bar where the patrons come to drown their sorrows, instead of enjoy the nightlife. I doubt he’d ever come here, but I can’t leave anywhere out and risk the chance of missing him. A quick look around reveals yet another expected failure.
I hang my head as I make my way back to my Black Smoke Indian Chief Dark Horse. Riding this motorcycle is the closest thing to the feeling of flying, I never wear a helmet so I can feel the wind on my face. Why anyone would choose this life is beyond me. What was he thinking?
A nearby scuffle draws my attention. A frightened woman’s scream pierces my eardrum, but it's quickly muffled. As a guardian, I am compulsed to check it out so I leisurely walk to the nearby alley. Three men have a woman backed into a corner. One of the men has a knife to her throat and his other hand is covering her mouth. In this situation, the results depend on one thing. I look up into the woman’s eyes; they’re fearful, but full of deceit. I shake my head and walk away, leaving her to her unfortunate, but deserving fate.
I straddle my motorcycle, run my fingers through my sandy blond hair, then kick my bike to life. The engine roars like an angry lion, yet it’s one of the only things on this earth that brings me any joy. I ride back to my apartment, grab a slice of leftover pizza from the fridge, and call it a night. I pull open my leather bound notebook and make notes of the stops I made and the vision in the woman’s eyes. She’s stealing the man’s wallet as she makes out with him as a distraction. I finish up and clear my mind.
Piercing sad eyes stab my brain and I flip back to Eva’s page. Across the top, I write “Honest Soul.” Her eyes hold such clarity and innocence, almost childlike. What is it about this woman, and why can't I stop thinking about her? I break out my drawing pencils and sketch her eyes in great detail then add color. The image stares back at me and I want to soothe her pain. I wrap the leather cord around the notebook and return it to it’s home on my side table. I strip down to my boxer briefs, then get on my knees and say my nightly prayer.
