Balance

At the sound of the door closing behind her, I feel so relieved to hear those stilettos clicking away from my apartment. Another nightmarish night of a date my mom forced me to go to. It was the daughter of a very good business associate and came with high recommendations. If she needed the advertising that much, then the product was surely either faulty or of cheap quality. And boy was I right!

After an hour of suffering through dinner, which seemed to last forever, I told her that I was tired and that I would call her an Uber, but she insisted to have another drink at my place while making it pretty clear that it wasn’t alcohol she craved for. Someone might wonder why couldn’t I just say no and make an excuse to ditch her if she appeared completely uninteresting to me, but it’s been too long since I've even felt the slightest emotional attraction to any woman, so without guilt I got used to using them as an object of sexual release; but the second I was done, I wished I could be fucking Houdini and make them disappear without another word or touch.

And to think my mom believed she was wife material…What a joke!

Prostitutes have more dignity than this woman as well as my full respect. The way I see it, their profession is actually a social offering to the society. This woman only looked decent on the outside and had all the standard required boxes checked, but she was so slimy and so full of herself, that I even had a hard time coming after fucking her brains out for too long. Neither her perfect curves spotlighted in her sexy designer lingerie, nor her expensive perfume could mask away the dirt inside her soul. Don’t get me wrong as I am not one to like prudes, but she wasn’t just a free spirit, she was a cheap spirit, so superficial and fake. The kind that leaves you with a nasty taste afterwards and gives you a bad hangover the next morning.

I had long since given up on women. If they were nice on the inside, they were ugly on the outside and sorry (not) but I am a guy that doesn’t settle for anything less than perfect. MY version of perfect. I know I am no angel myself but that doesn’t make a difference to my demands, as although I realize I am spoiled rotten, I don’t give a flying fuck since nothing or no one is out of my reach and because no such thing as MY perfect woman exists, I 'll just use them for their body as they want to use me for my… well, everything.

Next day I simply block her number, as she kept calling and texting me over and over again. She can go tell daddy if she wants to. I really regretted taking her to my bed after all, as sex with her wasn’t worth any more than fucking the palm of my hand.

I head over to my parents house since it’s a family tradition for me and my brothers to gather up once a month at their lake cabin and spend the whole day simply bonding. It used to be fun but now it’s a torture. My two brothers, one of them actually younger than me, are both married and already have kids, so naturally I am treated as the typical problematic middle child, with relationship and attachment issues that everyone seems to think they can fix. Who said I needed fixing?

Today was particularly hard as my mom was on full offense mode, striking every chance she got.

“You know Veronica called me crying.” My mom scolded me.

“Oh I wonder why, what could possibly be wrong with such an innocent angel?” I mocked.

My brothers both laughed and Liam, the youngest, actually even managed to somehow choke on the delicious soup my mom made. I previously told them about the night with Veronica from hell and not skipping any of the spicy details from the stunts she tried to pull, which was obviously too much information for my siblings to swallow down.

We were casually chatting and catching up with everything and everyone, when my younger brother suddenly walked away, only to shortly return holding a bottle of a good aged bourbon from my dad’s well known collection.

Anthony, my older brother had a big smile plastered on his face and obviously already knew the reason behind this.

“Ok, spill the beans” my mom requested in a serious tone.

“This is one of my finest so this better be good son”. My dad said half smiling.

“Weeell… I got two good things coming up! Liam said in a chirped voice. “We are expecting a baby.” He declared with eyes shining from happiness.

“And…?” Mom encouraged him to proceed, barely able to contain her excitement, in a face that looked like it was ready to joy-explode.

“And… we are expecting a baby.”He repeated.

“Aren’t you a little too young for Alzheimer’s?” I teased.

Then my mom gasped and she screamed in excitement. “You are having twins!”

The smile on that smug's face was priceless! Just great! I am expecting the comment any time now. Anywhere between the back taps and the hugs. I know it’s coming…

“Sebastian!” Yeap! There it is… and I know there is more on the way. “When will the day come, when we hear such amazing news coming out of your mouth?” She disappointedly points out.

“When Zeus takes back the heavens!” I joke and her face drops from disappointment. “Never mom!” I sincerely answer annoyed, not making an effort to hide it. “Don’t get me wrong brother, I am happy for you but this is not anything I ever see happening for me.”

My mom sits on the lounge chair and hides her face with her palms. Is she crying? WTF?

“Darling?” My dad puts his calloused hand on the back of her head in a comforting way, looking worried.

“Oh come on mom! Don’t make a big deal out of this. Not everyone's dream is to get married and have kids. I am a successful incredibly good looking amazing son, what more a mother can ask of her child?” I make an effort to joke raising my eyebrows up and down in a smug tone.

“Family is everything and if you opt out of the greatest gift life can offer a man, then you have lived in vain!” My dad says disappointedly in a drop dead serious tone, while my mom didn’t answer my remark”.

Great! Now my dad was onboard the whole settle down craze my mom was into the past year or so. He was never forcing me into anything so this is unexpected of him. I tried to resonate with them explaining that my life was perfect the way it was. I don’t know who I was trying to convince more, them or myself. My face dropped as the awareness hit me.

After some more of us discussing and arguing about the matter I leave the cabin feeling furious that this time none of my brothers supported me. We are very bonded as a family and theoretically they should have had my back on the matter. Especially after all the juicy details I shared with them about my sex life. I mean…god! Do they even have one anymore? None of them speaks about it. All they talk about is their jobs, the kids and everything concerning their little house in the prairie life. Ok the little one is obviously having sex but after two more crying pooping machines addition to the routine, I doubt that there will be any time left for anything else besides diapers and errands. God! Three kids! How will they manage? Poor Liam.

I am so glad l am single and I swear to myself never to let any woman do that to me.

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