a lot of potential

"I wanted so badly to be able to get through your story, but distracting error after error stalled the story as I tried to read. I would love it if you could proofread and then republish the corrections. A story about divine creatures can be enchanting and a thrill to read, but glaring errors kill the flow. if you would like me to give details and point these out, I can do that if you wish. Also try grammarly.com, the free part can help a lot. Keep at it! "