Happier
There used to be four of us.
Me,Addie and the twins.
We were inseparable,
We were incomplete without each other,
We were each other's comfort zone and solace.
We used to be a happy family.
Mom and dad were still head over heels in love and our lives couldn't have been anymore beautiful.
But then fate decided to play a cruel game with me and my family and snatched them from us.
And then the nightmare begun.
It all begun to fall apart.
Our family was no longer peaceful and beautiful but instead suffocating.
My dad became distant.
My mom became bitter.
Everything turned from a beautiful dream to a dreadful nightmare.
The memories of our happy days stayed as memories and all we lived for now was sadness,hate,grudges and daily arguments.
My mom and dad were no longer head over heels in love.Instead they turned themselves into stranger living under the same roof and having to endure each other's presence for the sake of their daughters'.
I was no longer the happy,care free and jovial Aarinola Zakariya anymore.No,now I was filled with nothing but sadness and regret and loads of what Ifs'
what if I hadn't insisted we go out that day
What if we didn't leave the house that day
What if we didn't get up from that bench like our mother instructed
What if-
What if-
What if-
It drives me crazy.
It drives me nuts.
Knowing that I am half the reason my family is in pain today.
Knowing that I am the reason my parents can no longer stay in a room together anymore without wanting each other's heads.
Knowing that I am the reason for my own depression.
For my sadness.
For my misery as well as that of my family.
I've always been the one causing trouble for my parents,
Right since I was a little girl
I've always been a little rebellious and hard headed
Always wanting things to go my way
But if I had just stayed down that day none of this would have happened and we wouldn't be wallowing in pain and heartaches.
We would still be one happy family.
United.
Together.
Forever.
We would still be one and not separated.
We would still be happy.
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Renyee
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