Chapter 1
Adjust behave mix well and become like everybody else. There is nothing here. There is nothing in here for you. We conduct well and you are housed and fed. How do you like the house within the home the whole area? With the ticking of the time bomb? Does it click when you enter, when you leave, or whenever you are near? Do the screams of laughing women and men behind them make you cringe?
"How can someone eat his oyster in peace?"
"When the screaming is never still."
What happiness for you to be nearby when there is nothing but the best for you? How do you like the girls as they try and try again to misbehave and make nonsense of who you are? How are you? It has nothing to do with a sense you are nonsense. We believe in the here, and that is we are modern. We do modern deeds, and we kick someone like you in a mannerly way.
No sense in the right direction. Whoever disagrees with me cannot live in England. We deny you nothing. We deny you nothing. I wish that the money we give you dries up. So we are obliged to cut you off. We behaved well in the past and made you do the work when the work was nonsense. Your mum and dad were perfect.
Whenever now you go, you are piranha. We are not making sense we are never going to lend a hand. We have no handshakes and the house you place so much it has gone already. It is for the likes of children and child care and the stuffy nonsense that you are alive is nothing you are now half dead with the exhaustion and the task of telling the world what has happened.
"What has happened to you?"
"Nothing that is the point no one has made you famous no one has gotten inside you except him. No one has the right words to mark you but him."
"Certainties are the secret of our success we are the women who can sing and dance."
"If you cannot then we believe you have to bow out."
"If you are nothing but moaning and groaning then what does it matter?"
Hatred boiling nagging and taking control of the contortions and making the whole world contorted and lost control. Contortionists and the mellow feelings that madden and mark the woman who is alone. Mad and alone sad and adrift inside her cage. The cage she refuses to leave. No one to take hold of her hand but him and she is in denial of who she is. That she believes in totally.
One must embrace all parts of oneself otherwise one is dead. Who is dead I am not dead. The self that sat down and wrote this nonsense and tried and tried again not to see because the blindingly obvious to me is not to her.
"She belongs to me."
"I do not."
"She belongs to me."
"No thank you."
"That there is nothing the matter with you why do you need medicine why do you need treatment a waste of space."
"She belongs to me."
"Look there is nothing the matter with the world. But that it is henpecking me."
Women in the streets trying not to throw stones their stony silences and their dogs trying not to let the dogs loose on me.
This is a hate crime. Well, what else can it be?
This is the most awful thought does she dislike us as much as we, her?
The good British women who had led the attack on China to civilized them with their good sense where are they now?
We must make sense of who we are and what else can it be there is nothing the matter with you. Why don't you join in and make more fun and most of it will come?
It is crazy what else did it make the whole world think? They are silenced by the good sense of the whole thing.
The women walk shouting bollocks and stuff and it makes me smile when they do it matters to them to think and feel so in their aptitude of making sensible choices and matter-of-fact freedoms.
All of us behave in accord and make sense in one way or another.. Do we believe you are all shocked by the freedoms we enjoy?
"No of course not I like you all equally. The freedom and the equality we all enjoy in England are fantastic. I blow hot and cold how can a nation who once wrote so much and so many books that shaped the promised lands now have the inability to see that if some women are chasing another one to grim death is wrong? Not a word is said as on the bus there is the jolly ones making the tight spots and trying to grab my knees. Then the speedy and the other stuff there is a tight spot here and now until I had to get something for my leaks as the water shortages did not work in my pants."
"It has been more years than I can remember."
"The English never give up."
The rated self the understatement and the bank statements as a result because if some group of fishwives is chasing you round the bend all that one can do is have a plan in order to travel from A to B. Without coming to harm?"
"Yes it is silly is it not and time wasted?"
"We do not think so we deny ourselves nothing."
"Well, it is alright."
"Is there some sorry compensation for such behavior?"
"Well, there must be."
"I must see to it that the folly is that if someone is willing to pay for chasing me round and round like the magic roundabout I get paid."
Rob plunder then go and conquer telling the world the worst things about the best things. Friends no longer and no more said as done for.
A woman must never go outside at night and when she does she must have the right amount of respect. The thing was she was on the phone again and he was elated. I felt the pang the familiar pang that settled me into orbit. I left for the shops and did not want to make the turn. I just did not know where else to take myself to.
When I returned he and she were still on the phone the lasting discourse was normally sweet for them both they missed the banter being interrupted by me. They needed to feel the fear or something the illogical thought came to me they need me to feel. So I made off with the idea that maybe I was never going to be happy.
Went and made the purchase and ate the entire tube of ice cream.
The Diabetic must be mad. I am now no more young it can cause me hardship to fall ill. On the brink of sadness then I decline no more I sit up straighter than before and startle my fellow mad p
