I find the idea of your story very interesting and unique! However, I believe your characters need some work so they can be more realistic and relatable. I think they need a little more depth, rounding them out with flaws or unique and subtle traits will help with that. I also wish the world building you give us in your information was a little more spread out as right now it feels a little heavy handed and strong, making it a little jarring to read. There are some grammatical errors that can easily be fixed, such as a lack of capitalization and incorrect punctuation. Everything I've mentioned can be changed with a little editing after you've completed a first draft, and I see nothing majorly wrong with the story.
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I admire your unique plot and I'm excited to see how it pans out, I can't wait to see how it turns out, I can't wait to see how you continue the story, I think it'll be a great success!